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March 28, 2018

George Lopez Notary Public

Filed under: Sit-Coms — Tags: — admin @ 10:10 am

GEORGE: Hey Angie, I think we need a Notary for Carmen’s report card.

ANGIE: Okay, I can call one. Can you use the online yellow pages.

GEORGE: I prefer the paginas amarillos, but I’ll settle for whatever I can get.

ANGIE: If you use the paginas amarillos, you will get a Notario Publico. I’m not sure if that’s even legal.

GEORGE: Just as long as it’s barely legal. You know what I mean. Like that swim suit you wore last year.

ANGIE: Hey, I like that swim suit.

GEORGE: Me too!

ERNIE: Hey guys. I overheard you need a Notary to notarize a swim suit? That’s going to be one very small notarization in two pieces.

ANGIE: You can’t notarize a swim suit.

GEORGE: I know, there would be hardly anything to notarize, in your case.

ERNIE: You know, I just had lunch. I saw some old ladies eating potatoes. How pathetic, you know?

GEORGE: I know. You saw mamas eating papas.

CARMEN: Very funny. Like cannibalism. Like the time I went to have Japanese food at a cannibalistic restaurant where the first item on the menu was Raw Men.

GEORGE: Hey Carmen, you are too young to be eating raw men. At least cook them first and get some frijoles tambien!

CARMEN: For your information, my report card cannot be notarized. We need your signature on a document saying that you saw my report card.

ANGIE: Oh, so now we are getting technical.

CARMEN: If you don’t get technical, the notarization will not be honored or even possible.

GEORGE: Good point. Which of my ID’s should I use?

ANGIE: The one that’s not expired!

GEORGE: Oh, I better check. But, don’t we need to draft a document?

BENNY: I can draft the document. I have plenty of experience with this getting my ex-boyfriends out of jail and getting their vehicles out of impound. What does the document need to say?

ANGIE: It says right here?

GEORGE: Can I write it in Spanish and then get a certified translator?

BENNY: That’s gonna cost you, and there’s no guarantee the translation will be correct.

GEORGE: Well, what if I pretend I can’t speak English, then can the Notary still Notarize my signature?

ANGIE: I think that direct communication is required for notarizing a person’s signature in most states according to the 123notary.com blog.

GEORGE: 123notary? Well why use the paginas amarillos when we can use uno dos tres notary punto com!

VIC: It sounds more like a Cuban radio station the way you say it. It makes me want to get my congas out of the closet because they are collecting dust.

ANGIE: But, if you play them you will be raising the dust, and we wouldn’t want that!

VIC: Silence, and let the master take part in his trade…. Rumba… my boriquen rumba… ay mi dios my rumba, sumba y catumba… felices!!!!

ANGIE: What happened to ritmo cubano?

VIC: This one is Puerto Rican, just like the Notary who’s coming in five minutes. I already arranged the meeting and drafted the document. You see. I am a step ahead of you. All I ask, is that you let him lead. Notaries from San Juan are like that.

NOTARY: I’m here! Which one of you is Vic.

VIC: Me, of course, the good looking one papi.

GEORGE: I’m good looking too… most of the time, at least when I’ve had my hair done. I’m the signer, so here is my ID.

NOTARY: You don’t look like the guy in the photo.

GEORGE: Oh that’s because I had my hair done for the photo, but didn’t today. But, the eyebrows should match. See???

NOTARY: Hmm. Okay. Sign here, and then sign my journal.

GEORGE: Journal? Nobody told me anything about a journal.

NOTARY: Su firma aqui por favor!

GEORGE: Okay… ahorita!

NOTARY: Stamps the form. Here you are. Your daughter is off the hook. Your DJ, that’s another story. I know a good conga teacher not far from here.

VIC: Hey, I am practically a professional, what are you talking about? Hey, doesn’t George have to swear under Oath?

NOTARY: Not today. Maybe next time if you are lucky. Just keep your arm flexible just in case I ask you to raise your right hand.

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Jane the Virgin Notary
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Psych Notary Episode. This the victim die of food poisoning or was he murdered?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19397

Notary with Tourettes syndrome
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18999

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June 26, 2015

George Lopez Gets Notarized

Filed under: Humorous Posts — Tags: , , , — admin @ 11:36 pm

ANGIE: Now, you know the notarization is due at work in two days. We need to get a Notary here.

GEORGE: Okay, okay, okay. I’ll do it. Call someone from 123notary.com. They’ll send someone. And have them send someone who speaks Spanish.

ANGIE: But, you speak perfectly good English.

GEORGE: I know, I know, but if I offer them some chips and salsa de chile arbol after the notarization, if they speak Spanish, they won’t give me funny looks.

CARMEN: Everybody gives you funny looks.

GEORGE: Now, you watch your mouth Carmen. You remember who put you here on this planet.

VIC (Angie’s father) : It is so ironic, that he could put you here…. on this planet… when he himself is from an entirely different planet…

ANGIE: Where are you going in such a hurry?

VIC: I have a hot date with my 27 year old girlfriend. We are going to a five star buffet. Don’t tell her anything. She thinks I’m not a day over fifty-five…

ERNIE: I brought my mobile internet. Look, you can get 123notary.com/m right on my iphone. You never know when you need a Notary.

GEORGE: Funny you should mention that. I need a notarized affidavit, contract, and deposition tambien!

ERNIE: All of that? I hope they give you a package deal and throw in some tickets to the Lakers game too for what they are going to charge.

CARMEN: Do they have notaries who are cute?

BENNY: Yeah, I’ll settle for a younger guy, maybe around forty… who doesn’t drink too much, and doesn’t have any neck tattoos. Or at least not too many.

(the next day…)

NOTARY: Boy, the traffic here is terrible. George, you have all the documents we talked about right?

GEORGE: (shows up in white beard and looking 80 years old) Yes, I’m ready to notarize my son’s permission to go on a trip form.

NOTARY: I thought I was notarizing George.

GEORGE: Just kidding. Here I am and here is my ID.

NOTARY: You really had me there George!

GEORGE: That’s nothing. Check out what I got from one of the guys at Whole Foods. It’s the new thing in fashion for those in the food industry. A beard net!

NOTARY: Tan Loco George! But, I like it!

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Woody Allen gets notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14709

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October 16, 2016

Best Virtual Notary Comedy Compilation Updated to 2018

Back in 2015, I created a list of the most popular virual notary comedy blog entries written so far. I decided to create an updated list with some of the more popular older entries and a few newer entries that were in the top 20% of popularity in their category. Enjoy!
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ALPHABETICAL BY THEME OR POST NAME
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Animals – 20 posts about animals at signings
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=3074

Apps – New Notary Apps for the iPhone 7 you’ve never dreamed of!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=10977

Apps – Honey you can kiss my app
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14902

Astrology – What’s your sign? Notary horoscopes
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19001

Bartender Notary — a reverse mortgage on the rocks
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4080

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries Comedy String (popular)
Disclaimer: many of you are not able to discern between satire and racism and this is light-hearted satire and not demeaning to anyone. Please keep your comments polite or we will take action against you for slander.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=black-notaries-versus-white-notaries

Children – Can I bring my 12 year old to a signing?

Can I bring my 12 year old to a signing?

Coffee — Notaries in cars getting coffee (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18945

Court – Noternity Court

Noternity Court

Dating – How Notary work is similar to online dating!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15763

Dating – Notary Dating & romance from A to Z (compilation)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17451

Debate – The 2016 Notary Public Debate
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16006

Disney Notary World (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18880

Driving – Notary Ed similar to Driver’s Education
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19132

Flashpoint – Notary job for a hostage with a multimillion dollar contract

Flashpoint — Notary job for a hostage with a multimillion dollar contract

George Lopez Notary Episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?s=george+lopez

Heaven & Hell Index of Posts
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16640

Health – Barack’s Notary-Care, are you covered?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16055

Hell – Notary Hell — Yeah, but it’s a dry heat!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13196

Hotel – The Sleezy Notary Motel
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16118

Hotel – Welcome to the Notary Hotel (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=8822

Identification – When someone does not have ID. new approaches!

What to do when someone doesn’t have their ID – new approaches

Jane the Virgin Notary (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14899

Lifestyles of the Rich and Infamous Signing Companies
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16715

Maria – Compilation of Mafia Related Notary Posts
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20352

Mafia – Tony Soprano Gets Notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14897

Mafia – The Mafia Notary with the violin case and wine
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19280

Mafia – The Notary, The Mafia & The Fedex Drop Box
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6867

Marijuana – Your highness or my highness? Notaries in the age of pot
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19256

Mayan – The Mayan Rescission Calendar
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15096

Medical – Pulling the plug; A Notary story
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13722

Notary Aptitude Test
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15853

Notary – Are you a Yes-tery or a No-tary?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16626

Notary – How Notary work is similar to online dating
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15763

Notary – The Noterator
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19116

Notary – You know you’re a notary when…
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16038

Politics – A Compilation of posts about politics relating to Notaries. Posts about Trump, Hillary, Jeff Sessions, Alt-Right, Bernie, Immigration, and Guest Speakers who get harrased by college students.
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20357

Politics – How Carmen dealt with some Alt-Right customers (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19092

Politics – Heard of PC? What about Notarily Correct? (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19463

Politics – Notary speaker offends college students
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19395

Politics – Notary guest speaker gets harrased by students

A Notary guest speaker gets harrassed by students

Politics – Notarizing Jeff Sessions on Torture

Notarizing Jeff Sessions on Torture

Price – The Flo-tary and the name your price tool
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16194

Psychic – Psych Notary Episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?s=psych

Psychic – Notary Psychic Tarot Card Reading
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19126

Shark Tank — Self Driving Notary and other posts (popular string)
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=shark-tank

Sleep – Can you sign in your sleep? What would that be like?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18874

Social Media — Affiant: a social media site for Notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6410

Space – Notary Space Station: In space, nobody can hear you sign!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18920

Steve Jobs Notary Smart-Seal (The)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16522

Suicide – Notary Suicide Hotline (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6995

The Towles Booth
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=9456

Tourettes – Notary with Tourettes Syndrome (popular)

Notary with Tourettes Syndrome

Train – The Notary Train
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18928

Transgender – A new acknowledgment form for transgender people

The new acknowledgment form for transgender people

Trump — Making American Notaries Great Again
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17023

Vampire Notaries – 24 hour service!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4094

Vietnam – Notarization in The Trang
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19652

Zoo – Welcome to the Notary Zoo (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15994

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You might also like:

Best Virtual notary Comedy Compilation 2015
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15957

Compilation of best Notary sit-com episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15949

.

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October 30, 2015

Compilation of Notary Sit-Com Episodes!

Filed under: Compilations,Popular on Facebook (A little),Sit-Coms — Tags: — admin @ 11:32 am

123notary has been writing sit-com episodes for over a year now. It is time that we put them all in one compilation so you can see them all at once! Many of these links are strings to multiple episodes from over the last two years. Here they are!

POPULAR
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Shark Tank
“Good Sign” seeks an investment of 2 million dollars!
Good Sign will reward Notaries by not forcing them to do fax-backs once they have proven a reliable track record for accuracy!
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=shark-tank

Seinfeld
(1) George’s parents get a vow renewal
(2) The List. Kramer has to get his hands on the list of signing companies.
(3) George Needs a Notary
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=seinfeld

Psych
A man dies of accidental food poisoning and Shawn solves the case using his psychic powers. They find a Power of Attorney behind the Disneyland document that solves the case. But, Shawn is upset that the Notary will not notarize his stuffed penguin
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=psych
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ALPHABETICAL
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All in the Family
Archie needs his drug test notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=all-in-the-family

“Apprentice” — see “The Apprentice.”

Big Bang Theory
Feeling in control Notarizing
Raj wants to take Notary lessons. Sheldon wants to know if being notarized can make them sexy…
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=big-bang-theory

Byron Allen — Notary Hot Chocolate
See how Earthquake describes Notaries in the ghetto.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=byron-allen

Charlie Rose
Charlie Rose interviews a Notary and discusses why he became a Notary and the future of the Notary industry.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=charlie-rose
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Cheers
Sammy gets a name change notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=cheers

Comedy Central Notary Roast (na/new)
See how Don Rickles and Amy Schumer make commentary about the Notary world.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=comedy-central

Family Guy
Peter joins ISIS by mistake & needs a notarized conversion
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=family-guy

Family Feud
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=family-feud
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Flashpoint
Notary job for a hostage with a multimillion dollar contract.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=flashpoint

Friends
Phoebe’s boyfriend won’t take No-tary for an answer
She’s trying to break up with him, but he always thinks she’s kidding.
So, she needs to get a notarized statement to prove she means it!
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=friends

George Lopez
George needs a Notary for Carmen’s report card and wants to use the paginas amarillos.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=george-lopez

Good Times
JJ draws a Notary Seal
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=good-times
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Happy Days
The Chinese equivalent of the Fonz appropriately named, “The Fong” needs to get notarized and says, “Don’t touch the leather.”
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=happy-days

I love Lucy
The Power of Attorney
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=10382

Leave it to Beaver
Notarized parental consent form
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13180

Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous (new/na)
See how infamous signing companies who don’t pay their Notaries are living it up.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=lifestyles-of-the-rich-and-famous

“Lucy” — see “I Love Lucy”
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Minions
A scene from the Minion Loan Signing.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=minions

Modern Family
An Affidavit of Citizenship & Affidavit of Domicile
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=modernfamily

Noternity Court
Your honor, it was 20 years ago. I can’t possibly remember if I notarized that document…
You are…. the Notary!
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=noternity-court
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The Middle
Sue calls the Notary about an Occupancy Affidavit
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=the-middle

Notarization on the Steve Harvey Show
Carol meets someone who notarized her 20 years ago and they fall in love!
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=steve-harvey

Notary Housewives
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=notary-housewives

Taxi
Reverend Jim becomes a Notary
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=taxi
.

The Apprentice (new/na)
David Schwimmer competes on The Apprentice
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=the-apprentice

Two and a Half Men
(1) Learning the ropes. Charlie goes to a hot Notary who goes easy on him.
(2) Impaired Judgment. Charlie finds it therapeutic to notarize documents and brings a bottle of vodka for the signers!
(3) Charlie learns the fine art of deterring Notary fraud.
(4) Charlie’s mom needs a Power of Attorney for property management
(5) The intercontinental notary seal
(6) A notary experience
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=twoandahalfmen

Wheel of Fortune
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=wheel-of-fortune

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