August 2014 - Notary Blog - Signing Tips, Marketing Tips, General Notary Advice -

Notary Blog – Signing Tips, Marketing Tips, General Notary Advice – Control Panel

August 31, 2014

Aug: Signing Companies w/Gossip

Filed under: Signing Company Gossip — Tags: — admin @ 7:53 am

Two notaries get the boot from FASS and are heartbroken. Dropped from the list. That’s what can happen when you hang with a “fass” moving crowd! But, honestly, if they pay well, they can afford to pick and choose!

Land & Law Group
One notary had to wait four months to get paid and thanked me personally for our letter from hell (demand letter) which apparently worked. BTW, our demand letter is accessible if you visit our resources page and then click on the how to make sure you get paid page!

Notary Network Solutions
One notary is at the 59 day mark and didn’t get paid and is tired of excuses! Another notary complains of the same thing!

Notary Pro
Nine months and no pay in sight? Another notary had trouble getting paid, but is giving them another choice since they were trying to get everyone paid.

Safe Signings
A notary raves about this company and how professional, fair and fast paying they are!

Select Signings
One notary worked for them for 12 years! She said they were generally good, but once the Title company was late sending docs. Don’t blame the signing company for the failing of the title company!

The Closing Group
This company sent out cattle calls for notaries who were 100 miles away from the signing. Seriously!


August 30, 2014

Taqueria El Notario — a Notary Taco Joint

Filed under: Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , , — admin @ 3:13 am

We wrote some other fun blog articles about The Notary Hotel, Notary Fast Food, Notary haute cuisine, and others. But, this one is about a notarial taco place. Hope you like it. Just don’t over do it with the hot sauce. It is very potent here.

Dot your eyes, and cross your tortillas!
Welcome to Notary Taco, or as we call it Taqueria El Notario. Please make sure you have errors and “emissions” insurance if you eat the three bean burrito for the sake of our other patrons. Since we had a few Notary wannabe gangsta’s, instead of a drive through window, we have a drive by window. The window is extra low in case you are driving a low rider. I guess I’m a few decades behind the times, but in Los Angeles, we still have a few of those around.

Before you read our menu, please read the following disclosure:

Notice of Right to Carnitas
As a customer of Taqueria El Notario, you have the right to eat carnitas at any time during business hours. There is no limit to how many carnitas tacos you may consume. Please sign and date to indicate that you have read this document and are aware of your right to carnitas… and pastor!

Here are a few of our choice items:

Habanero Rescission Sauce
If you still alive 3 days after consuming this, you have the right to rescind.

Personally Known Pico de Gallo
Eat this regularly with our home-made chips, and you will feel like you know us.

Pollo of Attorney
I know it sounds a bit loco, but our pollo is so good, we got it patented by an Attorney, hence the name!

Backdated Burrito
The freshness of the ingredients is up to date, it is just that we put yesterday’s date on the burrito.

Salsa Verde Venue
State of California; County of Los Angeles! — The salsa is green at this venue

Avocado Affidavit
This chunky guacamole is so good you’ll swear by it!

Tequilla Lime Testimonium Ice Cream
Just be-clause…

Revoked Refried Beans
Eat these and your commission will be suspended, revoked or terminated — if you have gas.

Notary Commission Carnitas
One of our customers has been eating this dish his entire notary commission — hence the name.

Lengua Tacos
Enjoy one of these before you take an Oath.

Quit Claim Quesadillas
One customer liked these so much she sold her house to be able to afford them every day!

Many notaries come here daily. We hope you like our sauces, dishes and desserts. We hope you liked it, and we hope you come again.

You might also like:

Welcome to The Notary Hotel

A date with a notary at “Le Jurat”


August 29, 2014

Notary Information for Beginners – Best Posts


What is a Notary Public?

What makes a mobile notary a mobile notary?

Notary Journals from A to Z

Everything you need to know about journals

Identification requirements for being notarized

Notary Certificates, Notary Wording & Notary Verbiage

Become a Notary

Notary Oath of Office information

Notary Acts

What is a Jurat?

Everything you need to know about Acknowledgments!

Optional info on Acknowledgment Certificates

Information about various notary procedures

Interesting and uncommon notary acts

Additional Info

Industry standards in the notary business

Fraud and forgery related to the notary profession

Which states allow e-notarizations?

Notarizing your foreign language document!


August 28, 2014

I Love Lucy – The Power of Attorney

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Sit-Coms — Tags: — admin @ 7:06 am


LUCY: Ricky?

RICKY: (reading paper) Yeah, hon.

LUCY: I just got my hair done. You like?

RICKY: (buried in paper) It’s nice.

LUCY: You like the color? It’s my natural color, you know.

RICKY: (buried in paper) Uh-huh.

LUCY: Blue!

RICKY: (buried in paper) Sounds lovely.

Lucy rips paper away from Ricky.

LUCY: Ricky Ricardo, you haven’t been listening to a thing I said!

RICKY: I’m sorry, honey. I’m just trying to forget about the show I’m doing at the Copa.

LUCY: Show?

RICKY: I have so much to do beforehand, I don’t know how I’m gonna get it all done. The rehearsals. The publicity. The contracts. The manager wants one thing splained. The agent wants another thing splained. Ey-yi-yi-yi-yi.

LUCY: I’m good at splaining! Ricky, I know! Fred can be your power of attorney.

RICKY: Fred can be my what?

LUCY: He can act as your agent. You know Fred used to be a notary public.

RICKY: Fred? Really?

LUCY: As a landlord, he figured it might come in handy with other duties on the job. But he didn’t renew his commission. Not that he wouldn’t if you needed him to be your power of attorney.

RICKY: How come he didn’t renew?

LUCY: Ethel told me it was a secret.

RICKY: A secret? Lucy… you were never good at keeping secrets…

LUCY: Ricky, I promised Ethel I wouldn’t say anything…

RICKY: Lucy!

LUCY: (spilling beans) Two tenants wanted him to authorize an affidavit of domestic partnership.

RICKY: Without getting married first? Ey-yi-yi-yi-yi. Well, I don’t blame Fred for not renewing his commission.

LUCY: Bob and Arnold.

RICKY: Two… guys??

LUCY: Yep.

RICKY: We won’t be able to accept gay marriage until they land a man on the moon! Or Liberace gets married.

LUCY: Fred authorized the partnership. Whoops.

RICKY: So that’s the secret you weren’t good at keeping!


FRED: Who feels like playing gin rummy?

RICKY: Not me, Fred. I got a lot on my plate.

ETHEL: Fred never has a lot on his plate.

FRED: If you learned how to cook, maybe I would.

LUCY: Ethel, Ricky needs to find a power of attorney. Know anybody?

ETHEL: Uhhh… You mean drafted or notarized?

RICKY: Speaking of “drafted,” Fred, how will the notary know if the document was professionally drafted or drafted by a licensed attorney?

FRED: In fifty years, notaries will have a don’t ask, don’t tell policy, as long as you signed it.

ETHEL: Lucy, you didn’t happen to open that big round thing on your face with lipstick again, did you?

LUCY: I’ll have you know these are the natural color of my lips.

ETHEL: You didn’t answer the question.

LUCY: See, I am good at keeping secrets!


ATTORNEY: Very well, Mrs. Ricardo. Now you are attorney in fact. You can take this to any notary, get it notarized, and Mr. Ricardo’s contracts will be perfectly valid for both his manager and his agent.

RICKY: Now, Lucy, just because you’re an attorney in fact doesn’t mean I want you coming up with some hairbrained scheme to get into the show.

LUCY: Now why would you think that?

RICKY: Why wouldn’t I think that?

LUCY: As your attorney in fact, it wouldn’t be breaking the law if I…

RICKY: Lucy!

LUCY: Okay, okay. Jeesh. What a grouch.


NOTARY: Have you your document and I.D. ready?

LUCY: Here’s my driver’s license.


RICKY: Anything wrong?

NOTARY: This can’t be your license. Under “hair color,” it says “red.”

LUCY: Well what’s wrong with that? It is red.

NOTARY: Do you swear under oath that’s you were born with that hair color?

LUCY: Ehhhhhhhhh.


LUCY: Need a replacement?

RICKY: Huh?! But… I thought that was you.

LUCY: You thought wrong. Lucky for me I can fit into her dress.

RICKY: Where are my bongos? What’s that pungent odor I smell coming from that beatnik over there?



August 25, 2014

Notary Pick Up Lines Part 1

Filed under: Humorous Posts — Tags: — admin @ 10:39 am

Here are some great notary pick up lines, just in case you ever join a notary dating site.

What’s your sign?
Can I buy you a journal?
So, do you stamp here often?
That’s a nice embosser, is it gold, or gold plated?
Do you shake hands, or shake right thumbprints on the first date?
My signing or yours?
Should we do the signing at my house, your house, or at a Starbucks?
Are you into backdating?
What’s the weirdest ID you ever saw?
I would shake hands, but I can’t because I have a bad case of Notorial Sclerosis.
I just got my expiration date extended, what about you?
Is your APR higher than your rate?
Have you ever hired two notaries at the same time?
Gee, I just love this venue, wonder what county we’re in!
Do you think you could personally appear before me?
I had to initial a form before I could get an open tab!
So, you have ever exercised your right to cancel on a date?
There was a long line at the Fedex station this evening — what a night!
Don’t you hate it when the signer has a middle initial they never told you about?
So, are you a member of A certified member?

Also see:

Notary Pick Up Lines 2

Jane the Virgin Notary


August 24, 2014

Good Signing Companies “A” 2014 list

Filed under: Best Signing Companies — Tags: — admin @ 5:48 am

Here are some signing companies that we recommend. They have overwhelmingly positive reviews.
As always, before accepting work from a signing company, read the forums, and check for new gossip. I don’t want to put every single amazing signing company in the same blog entry, so I’m starting with those that start with an “A” and then next time we’ll move on to B. Lots to choose from though!

A-1 Title Professional Services

Affinity Notary

AMC Settlement Service

American Heritage Lending

AMR National Notary


Angi Notary Signing Services

ASAP Pro Notary Services

ASAP Signing Services

ATM / AKA Service Link
This company has a few minor complaints, but is overall okay.

ATS Document Service

Avenue 365


New Notary Apps that you really need!

The entire world has gone app crazy in the last few years. Personally, I use GPS, and my alarm clock. That’s about it for me in terms of apps. But, what types of apps might notaries need to stay ahead?

(1) Look up signing company reviews.
123notary already has this for i-phones. It is a page, not an app, but what is the difference right?

(2) Find a cheap gas station
Google already does this. Just visit and look up “cheap gas” or “gas prices” and then add your zip code. Or enter your city name and gas prices for a better selection if you live in a big city.
You can also use

(3) Billing applications?
Very few notaries use sophisticated technology to know who owes them what and for how long. But, there are companies out there who have billing applications that you can see at a glance who owes you what and who to invoice. Is it worth it? You tell us!

(4) Road condition apps.
There are GPS systems that tell you which route to your destination is faster under current situations. Such technology has cleaned up traffic congestion in many cities around the world. If you have technology that tells you how to avoid traffic, you could save an hour per day every day! That would be worth paying a bundle.

(5) Translation apps (risky)
The notary is supposed to be skilled in whatever language they use at a signing. If you look up words in an application, you might screw up and the signer might understand you incorrectly or not at all. Words sometimes have multiple translations. “Do you swear to tell the truth” could translate into “Will you marry me” if you miss a subtle nuance in certain languages. But, for those who are app crazy, you are apt to get one anyway. So, go for it! SayHi Translate can do this by the way!

(6) Mileage log apps for the IRS
The IRS may request to see your trip logs. If it is digital, that might be good, unless it is hard to download, print, or gets accidentally compromised. But, paper records can get lost too, so which way is safer? You can keep track of your miles using your i-phone if you have an app for that. I don’t know of any app like that, but they probably exist as probably 50 million Americans deduct mileage for one reason or another.

(7) eJournal applications?
These exist. You need to be an eNotary to use one. Out of 7000 notaries on our site, I’m sure there are a good three or four of you who are commissioned eNotaries.

(8) iSchedule
You guessed it. This app will manage your busy schedule. You can input all your appointments with this app and all is well until you go into a dead zone or run out of battery.

(9) TurboScan
Quickly scan multipage documents into high-quality PDF’s. Wow! Sounds like a winner for companies who want fax-backs.

(10) Documents Free (Mobile Office Suite)
Not sure what this does, but you can read up on it.

(11) Contacts <-> Excel
I think we all know what this is for.

(12) UPS Mobile
Ship your packages using your i-phone, and hopefully a UPS box. You might need a printer too.

And last but not least… (and appropriately numbered)

(13) Ghost Hunters Haunted House Finder
Find a haunted house near you. Or use it to look up your signings. If one of your signings is in an officially haunted house, suggest that you all meet at Starbucks. Use your Starbucks finder app to get there!

(14) Page Separator Pro
Split those legal and letter sized pieces of paper. Even some dual tray printers don’t have the ability to figure out which tray prints what, and why…

You might also like:

Choosing a name for your business license


August 23, 2014

Signing with invisible ink?

Signer: Can I sign with invisible ink?”
Notary: “Sure, if you don’t mind me using an invisible stamp”

It is not illegal to notarize using invisible ink, providing that the document is also invisible!
By the way, this invisible type of notarization is only “legal” if you also have an accompanying invisible #document

Ghost: Let’s get physical, physical, let’s get physical.
Notary: You want to be physical?
Ghost: Sure
Notary: Your singing sucks. Now, I get to say BOOOOO…

Ghost: You look like you’ve seen a ghost.
Notary: Newsflash, you are a ghost, and I’m looking at you.
Ghost: One ghost said to the other ghost, you look like you’ve seen a ghost
Notary: What are you, a comedian?
Ghost: No, but I do a little ghost writing.
Notary: I’ll pay you with invisible money.

Notary: I bet you can read the invisible ink under this blue light.
Ghost: The funny thing is — to ghosts, the invisible ink is readable clear as day, like glow in the dark. “I can read it just fiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnne.”

(1) Q. Can you sign a doc w/invisible ink?
A. If you notarize with an invisible notary seal
(2) Q. Can you sign a doc w/invisible ink?
A. Is the document & notary seal invisible too?


August 22, 2014

Notary Pit Stop

Filed under: Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: — admin @ 8:42 pm

I just love the new Cheerios commercial where the race car driver drives a little kid to school, and then they have a pit stop in front of the school where the kid fuels up on cereal. Very unique and classy commercial. The sports car was pretty cool too. Maybe I’ll see it driving around Los Angeles. But, what about having a notarial pit stop?

Racecar Driver Susan puts on her helmet, leaves her house and gets into her Ferrari notary race car. And she’s off. She leaves her house, she makes a perfect left turn at the light — uh oh, don’t hit Toto… NO, not the lawn… okay… and she makes a right turn, runs an orange light, and miraculously doesn’t get pulled over. Finally she makes it to the Johnson’s house.

The Johnson’s are going to do a notary signing. But, the signing will not be in their dining room like signings at “normal” people’s houses. They are not going to sign in their driveway either. That would take a few extra tenths of a second for the notary to get in and out. They are going to sign on the side of the street on a foldable Nascar Notary table. The Nascar Notary table is light, but built tough to last. It doesn’t topple over too easily either as it has two rounded two fee wide legs on either side of this rounded table.

Susan pulls off the road next to the curb. The table crew race over with the signing table. Ralph runs over with the signer’s ID in his stunning Nascar outfit with matching helmet (just in case he falls during his ten foot run from the lawn to the car.) Sammy runs over with the documents. The signers have rehearsed where they are going to sit, and have practiced running from the lawn to the table six hundred times over the last week to make sure they don’t lose even a single nanosecond during their signing. Last, the pen guy runs over with pens. He has substitute pens just in case. All of what I described in this paragraph happened 3.4 seconds by the way.

Everyone is seated, the notary has her stamp in a velcro pocket in her outfit for fast pulling out. Her journal was kept in the door of the car, and she has it in her hand. They are all set to go. Documents are on the table. Mr. Johnson signs one, turns it over, signs another, turns it over, Mrs. Johnson flips the document back up, signs it, and puts it on the done pile. The clock is ticking. 40.2 seconds have passed, and they are done with the Deed of Trust

Meanwhile, Ralph is taking readings on Susan’s tire pressure. Time for an extra half a pound on the rear left tire. But, wait, Mrs. Johnson has a question. Oh no! That will take time.

Mrs. Johnson: “Why is my APR higher than my rate?”
Ralph: Holds up a sign with the answer to that question “Right here ma’am”

Ralphs sign had the answer to Mrs. Johnson’s question. Ralph’s boss anticipated close to three hundred frequently asked questions and had signs to quickly answer all of those questions. The sign explained how the rate is based on the payments expressed as a percentage rate from the amount borrowed, while the APR was based on the monthly payments compared to the amount borrower after the fees and closing costs, PMI and a few other costs had been deducted, and expressed as a compounded annual rate. Mrs. Johnson read the sign, and understood the answer in 12.5 seconds. We didn’t loose too much time here.

And they are almost done. But, wait… Mr. Johnson has to explain in two paragraphs or less why he was late on a Mortgage payment back in 1997. He can’t even remember.

Mr. Johnson: “Honey, weren’t we on vacation in Acapulco in 1997. Isn’t that why we were late on our Mortgage payment?”
Mrs. Johnson: “No, it was because the bill got lost in the mail that month. Acapulco was in 1998.”
Mr. Johnson: “Good memory!”

Finally, Mrs. Johnson signed the last form and they are done! Ralph loads the documents and the journal and puts them in the front passenger door. Susan puts her seal in her velcro pocket, and vroom — she is off!

The entire signing took 6 minutes and 37.5 seconds. Not bad for a 95 page loan signing. Meanwhile, Susan drives two blocks down the street to her next stop which is a quick Fanta orange soda break. She wanted that to be 4.6 seconds, but they had to go slower because of the carbonation.


August 21, 2014

Wannabe #1 on 123notary? Consider this first!

Filed under: Advertising — Tags: , , — admin @ 11:53 pm

123notary is popular with Title companies because they know that the #1 people on our site are generally the cream of the crop. Of course, from time to time, someone less skilled gets in there because they pushed their way to the top, or because nobody else wanted the spot. Mrs. Meao’s strategy is to nap her way to the top, but we can’t all be cats, can we?

People email me daily to ask how much a #1 spot is. But, there is more to think about here. At, most of our clients are repeat clients. We typically keep our clients for an average of three or four years — paying clients that is. The freebies fall on and off much faster than that because they often don’t take it seriously, don’t fill in their notes, don’t confirm their listing, and get bumped off within months. Since we are in the repeat client business, it is imperative that we keep our clients happy. Sure, we have difficult personalities over there at 123. That is a known fact. But, people come to us not for our personalities — but, for results. If we fail to get them enough work, they won’t renew and that is that!

So, I personally do not want to sell you a #1 spot unless I am fairly certain that you will get enough work to merit renewing next year and not complaining about the money you spent this year. In a sense, I am picking and choosing who I want to sell the spot to. I don’t deny service to anyone, but the price can be dropped a bit for those who “quality” in my book. So, who qualifies?

There is no hard set rule who “qualifies” or who is “worthy” for a top spot on our directory. But, we are looking for things that make you attractive to the users of our site (who seldom communicate with us, but whose click behavior is evident in our analytics module.) Notaries with a handful of notary REVIEWS, 123notary CERTIFICATION, and a good NOTES SECTION are typically the ones who get a lot more business in those top spots. If you happen to have a catchy company name, good phone skills and an intimate knowledge of loan signing above and beyond what our certification test requires, then so much the better.

We don’t look good unless you look good. That is why we are so adamant about making sure you have a unique and pleasing notes section, notary education and some evidence that you have a few satisfied clients (notary reviews). It is just common sense. If you have the bells and whistles, chances are you will do well in your #1 spot, renew every year, and recommend us to all of your friends (and maybe a few enemies as well.)

(1) At 123notary, we don’t look good unless you look good. That is why we bug you about having a good notes section + reviews & certification.
(2) There are no hard set rules for who is “worthy” for a top spot on 123notary, but we like those who are knowledgeable & can prove it.

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