The Loan Ranger and Tonto ride in after a long morning chasing bandits, only to discover that there is a problem at Johnny’s signing.
JOHNNY (THE NOTARY): There’s a problem at the signing!
TONTO: What type of problem kimosave.
JOHNNY: The interest rate is too high.
TONTO: That is none of your business. Refer them to their lender. Now, Loan Ranger and I need to ride off into the sunset. Ooops, forgot that daylight sayings doesn’t start until next week — we ride off into non-sunset!
SALLY: The ID doesn’t match the signature, what will I do?
LOAN RANGER: No problem kimosave… Hey, he got me started on that — it’s an Indian thing. Okay, just ask for another ID. If they don’t have one, then call in. This is a problem for the Lender and not us. Now, we ride into the day.
SALLY: Wouldn’t it be more romantic to ride off into the sunset.
LOAN RANGER: Yes, but that would mean waiting around for three hours and fifteen minutes and neither one of us has time for that unless we took a really long break at Starbucks.
SALLY: Good Point.
GARY: Hey, the signing company won’t pay me.
TONTO: Use letter from hell from 123notary reference page. Ain’t nobody — does it betta!
GARY: Thanks Chaka-Tonto
TONTO: You are welcome kimosave — and remember — Through the fire, through whatever, come what may… for a chance at loving you…
GARY: Do you know the dance moves too?
TONTO: In my tribe we have our own dance moves when we dance to Chaka Khan with many feathers and chanting.
GARY: Gee — I wish I could be an Injin.
TONTO: You watch film — Boys on the Rez — you learn real story. Spend time on rez — get real picture.
GARY: Oh, you mean poverty, fry bread and green chili?
LOAN RANGER: It is more than that. They have stories that they use to teach their children how to cope with life.
GARY: I like stories, especially with green chili. What if you meet a girl you like, what do you say?
TONTO: My teepee or yours! Just kidding. Now we go kimosave!>