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August 3, 2017

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries: The Notary Manual

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular on Facebook (very),Popular on Linked In,Popular on Twitter,Popular Overall — Tags: , — admin @ 9:55 am

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries: The Notary Manual

TEACHER: Hello class. We are gathered here today to talk about Notary terms, and the state Notary manual. But, first I would like to ask what the manual means to you.

SHELLY: I see a short book designed to teach the Notaries of tomorrow the rules of the road in order to safeguard the integrity of notarized transactions which protects society at large in a broader sense.

TEACHER: Very good Shelly! And very wonky.

KIM JONG “AKA Korean mom”: It’s so very difficult to understand. Half the terms don’t show up in my English-Korean dictionary. What a pain! I have to use my English dictionary and then translate the words in the definition into Korean to figure it out. How will I pass my test? I tried to use that as an excuse to get out of jury duty but they chose me anyway until they found out I didn’t understand any of the legal terms they used! Like “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.”

TEACHER: Okay, just let me know if there are any terms that I can explain to you. I may not understand Korean, but I can break the complicated terms down in an understandable way.

SHALONDA: I see three things. (1) I see a technical manual that teaches the state & civil laws affecting Notaries public, and more that could help Notaries deter fraud, keep transactions official, and keep paperwork straight. (2) A book that teaches the how-to of doing daily Notary work and (3) A book full of new names for black people to name their kids — you know what I’m saying?

TEACHER: Well, I hadn’t thought about it like that before.

SHALONDA: Oh yeah. I named my kids after Notary terms several years ago. Jurat and Venue… that’s short for Venuetta.

SHELLY: Do you swear under Oath you named your kid Jurat?

SHALONDA: I most certainly do (raising her right hand). But, Jurat is more of a jokester. He doesn’t have a solemn bone in his body. The tread on his boots is shaped like a Notary seal, and he was playing outside after it was raining. It looked like we had impressions of notary seals all through the house. I told him to take his boots off after that.

SHELLY: All of this studying for the Notary exam is tiring. I heard that reading too much can be bad for your eyesight. No wonder Trump doesn’t need glasses.

KIM JONG: I know. That’s why my kid Myong is forbidden to study more than six hours a night. We are recommending dropping his study time from seven hours to five hours and forty-five minutes with the last forty-five minutes mostly study-oriented games, songs or something where he is not staring at a book or computer.

SHELLY: Well we were going to increase Tommy’s study time from forty minutes to an hour and twenty minutes after we found out how hard college is. But, we don’t want him to ruin his eyes, so we’ll compromise at seventy minutes a day.

KIM JONG: How will he possibly compete with those studying five hours a day?

SHELLY’s HUSBAND: She has a point. Tommy will never survive in college unless he studies more. What he does now will affect him for the rest of his life. And if he does poorly in school like my brother, then he might get stuck driving a garbage truck for the rest of his life. Or an Uber.

SHELLY: Or worse — he might have to become a Notary. What has four wheels and flies?

SHALONDA: Ooh! I know this one! A garbage truck.

KIM JONG: No, that’s the junior high version of the joke! The answer in this context is a Notary who is late to a signing because he would be driving so fast!

SHALONDA: Good point. Not funny point, but good. But, honestly, to be a Notary you need to study too. In some states you need to study at least 30 hours to pass the Notary test and then another 30 hours to be a good signing agent. This profession isn’t for jokes — that is if you want to succeed in it. And by the way, you should say what has four wheels and screeches, because when you round those corners, you’re gonna be screeching those tires, girl.

TEACHER: Well class, we do seem to be diverging now don’t we. Being a Notary is a very honorable and noble profession and not for those who lack character. No wonder Trump was never a Notary.

SHALONDA: But, it is for those who lack a high school diploma. There is no educational standard for this job other than passing a test. California, Louisiana and New York make the test hard. But, the other states will just hand out seals to any fool who applies. Like Presidential Seals. Where’s the nobility in that?

TEACHER: Good point. Well, in theory it is supposed to be noble.

SHELLY: Theory doesn’t cut it when a clueless Notary assists a fraud in stealing the Title to your house.

TEACHER: You’re right. Maybe having a longer course than our six hour course would help. Perhaps a background screening too not just for being a signing agent, but for being a Notary.

SHALONDA: In California, the FBI, DOJ, and KGB all check us, but in these other states there doesn’t seem to be a system of checks and balances.

KIM JONG: Perhaps, being a Notary should be regulated federally instead of by a bunch of irresponsible states who can’t keep anything straight. And that wasn’t a reference to the gay parts of California.

TEACHER: Well perhaps you’re right. In any case, let’s practice notarizing a Jurat.

SHALONDA: You’re going to notarize my daughter?

.



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May 4, 2017

Where can I find a Spanish Speaking Notary?

Filed under: Public Interest — Tags: , , , , , , , — admin @ 10:52 pm

Where can I find a Notary who speaks Spanish?
Look no further. 123notary.com has many Spanish speaking Notaries on board. Just look up a Notary by zip code and then use the language filter at the top right of the site. You can enter in the name of any language such as Spanish, Japanese, Vietnamese, American Sign Language, or more! In fact, we have Spanish speaking Notaries in almost all states and metros by the dozen! Additionally, we have a search filter directly above the search results where you can check the Spanish box and find only Spanish speaking Notary service providers.

How good is their Spanish language proficiency?
On 123notary.com, we have many Notaries who speak Spanish. The degree of fluency varies from Notary to Notary as some are conversational while others are native speakers. A handful are from Spanish speaking families who grew up in America and might be excellent at conversation but not as proficient at business oriented communication. So, test your Spanish speaking Notary out over the phone to make sure they are up to your standards before hiring them!

Notary Spanish — Attorneys vs. Non-Attorneys
Please be advised that Notaries in the United States are seldom Attorneys and non-Attorney Notaries may not give legal advice. Most Notaries are also not authorized to draft legal documents. There are affordable legal support centers where they can help you draft documents. Please make sure that your document is completely drafted before contacting a Notary Public from 123notary.com.

Immigration Advice
Notaries cannot give advice about immigration matters unless they are specifically licensed to do so. For immigration questions, please contact the proper authorities.

Notarizing in Spanish?
Notaries may Notarize a document that is in Spanish, however the Notary wording would be in English for the notarization. Some states require the Notary to be able to understand the document. Other states require the Notary to be able to communicate directly with the borrower in any language they both can communicate with. Please learn the laws of your state and how they apply to notarizing foreign language documents. The actual Notary wording must be in English if it is to be notarized in any of the 50 states in the USA. Each state has their own official Acknowledgment and Jurat Notarial wording which the Notary is responsible for knowing. The Notary wording can be included at the end of the document. However, the Notary can also staple a loose certificate form to the document and affix their seal to that certificate after it has been completely filled out. Signers will be required to sign the Notary journal in states where Notary journals are used (which includes most states.)

Oaths in Spanish?
Some Notary acts such as Jurats, Oaths, or other acts that include Oaths such as swearing in credible witnesses require the Notary to administer an Oath. An Oath for an English language document or Spanish language document can be performed in the language of your choice. If the signer or affiant feels more comfortable in Spanish and the Notary knows Spanish, you can conduct your Oath in Spanish.

How can I get a Spanish language document notarized?
As stated above, some states require the Notary to understand the language of the document while others don’t. However, the language of the notarization itself would be in English. You can find a notary on 123notary who speaks Spanish to assist you in this matter. Just visit our Advanced Search page and look up a Spanish Speaking Notary by zip code!

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February 10, 2017

A Notary goes Public on Shark Tank with Shazamdocs!

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Best Humorous Posts,Popular on Linked In,Popular Overall,Sit-Coms — Tags: — admin @ 9:06 pm

First up into the tank: A way to keep records on how long companies take to send electronic documents.

NOTARY: Hi, Sharks. I’m Jeremy. And I’m asking for $200,000 for twenty percent of my company, Shazamdocs. Sharks, there’s one thing that matters in life more than looking as dapper as Mr. Wonderful here.

MR. WONDERFUL: He knows of what he speaks.

LAURIE: He’s kissing up and I’m throwing up.

MR. WONDERFUL: Hush. Grab a breath mint.

NOTARY: What matters in life, whether you’re sharks or whether you’re a notary, is knowing when you’ll be paid!

MR. WONDERFUL: You’re speaking my language, son. The language of luv… of money.

NOTARY: The database on Shazamdocs monitors how long companies take to send electronic documents, and… by virtue of our exclusive algorithms… computes the average amount of time it takes to get paid. No longer will you have to waste your precious time and resources hitching yourself to companies that drag their feet when it comes to upholding their end of the transactions.

DAYMOND: Feet dragging is a drag.

NOTARY: We’re like Yelp for notaries. With your help, sharks, we’ll get this in the homes of notaries throughout the country, and after that, the world! Who wants to show this notary their own seal… of approval?

ROBERT: You, yourself, said you’re like Yelp for notaries. There’s nothing proprietary about that.

NOTARY: I’ve applied for a utility patent.

CUBAN: You’ll never get it.

LAURIE: Mark.

CUBAN: What? He’s living a pipe dream. What’s to stop anybody from charting the records of companies to see how quickly they pay their bills?

NOTARY: Nobody does it like we do.

CUBAN: I’m out.

MR. WONDERUL: Ouch.

CUBAN: What about you, Kevin? You said the guy knows of what he speaks.

MR. WONDERFUL: That’s when he was complimenting my impossibly dapper qualities.

LAURIE: You got the impossibly part right.

ROBERT: What do you sell the program for and what are your sales?

NOTARY: I sell it with an annual subscription rate of 19.95. And we’re in pre-launch.

DAYMOND: Uh-oh. So you’ve made bupkis.

ROBERT: Daymond, I didn’t even know you were Jewish!

MR. WONDERFUL: I’ll make you an offer. I don’t know what you’re worth, I’m taking a heck of a risk, but I’ll go on the ride with you. There are plenty of notaries who need greater assurances they’ll get paid faster. But $200,000 at twenty percent assumes a value of a million dollars. You’re not there yet. I’ll give you the $200,000. But I want forty percent of the business.

CUBAN/DAYMOND/ROBERT: Oy.

LAURIE: You’re all Jewish now.

MR. WONDERFUL: I hear the other sharks flapping their gums, but I don’t hear anyone putting their money where their yappers are. I made you an offer, Jeremy. What do you say?

NOTARY: I appreciate the offer, Mr. Wonderful.

ROBERT: If I brought a notary in, would you swear to that?

NOTARY: But with all due respect, that’s giving up too much equity. I’d like to hear what the remaining sharks have to say.

LAURIE: As you know, Jeremy, as I’ve said many times on Shark Tank. I can tell when something’s a zero. And I can tell when something’s a hero. And this… is most definitely… a thirty. Better than zero, but nowhere near a hero. I’m out.

ROBERT: Laurie, you were toying with the man.

LAURIE: No, I wasn’t. I’m just being honest.

ROBERT: Well, Jeremy, I see nothing proprietary here. And I’m not a big notary guy. If I ever need you to witness something, I’ll be a customer. But I don’t see it as an investment. I’m out.

CUBAN: So that leaves Mr. Wonderful’s less than wonderful offer. And Mr.Daymond.

DAYMOND: I hate it when companies drag their feet before paying somebody what they’re owed, so I’m with you there.

JEREMY: Would you consider joining up with Mr. Wonderful?

DAYMOND: As much as it pains me to say it, I might do the deal with Kevin, if he’s up for it.

MR. WONDERFUL: I’d do that deal. But, Jeremy, you’d be getting two sharks.

JEREMY: Would the both of you consider the deal for… thirty percent equity?

DAYMOND: 100 K each at fifteen percent each? What do you think, Kevin?

MR. WONDERFUL: I’ll do it with one contingency. That we test the accuracy of your program on us. If your program can tell us how long it’ll be before we pay you the 200 K, I’m in.

DAYMOND: Me too.

JEREMY: Right away?

MR. WONDERFUL: Sorry. I would’ve paid you after hell freezes over.

DAYMOND: Me too.

MR. WONDERFUL/DAYMOND: I’m out!

.

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February 7, 2017

Notary Wording

Filed under: Technical & Legal — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , — admin @ 12:32 am

Notary Wording Varies from State to State
There is no official American Notary wording. Notary verbiage differs from state to state, and varies based on what type of Notary act you are having done. There are various common types of notarizations such as Acknowledged signatures, Jurats, Oaths and Affirmations. The vast majority of notarizations are Acknowledgments whose wording states that the signer appeared before the Notary, was positively identified, and signed the document.

Notary Certificates — what type of wording is included.
Your typical Acknowledgment or Jurat Certificate will include several sections with wording.

1. Venue
The venue states the state and county where the notarization is taking place. Please note that the Notary is not always commissioned in the county where the notarization is taking place. So, if you are in Orange county, but the Notary is from San Diego, please make sure they put the venue county based on where the notarization is taking place, and not where they live.

2. Boiler Plate Wording
The main body of the text could be worded in an infinite variety of ways, but normally state the date of the signing, name of the signer, the name of the Notary, the fact that the signer appeared before the Notary, the fact that the signer signed the document, and if an Oath was included (Jurats by definition have Oaths) then the fact that the signer swore before the Notary. The verbiage “subscribed and sworn to before me this (date)” is commonly used in many states especially in New York where the cabbies enjoy the swearing part more than any other part of the Notarization.

3. The Signature Section
The bottom of the notary wording or notary verbiage has room for the Notary’s seal which might mean their signature or their official notary stamp. In most states the Notary signs and stamps, or might even emboss with a non-inked embosser as a secondary form of stamp.

Types of Acknowledgments
Normally, when people want to be Notarized, they ask the Notary if they can notarize a Jurat for them. In actuality, most Notarizations are for Acknowlegments. Normally people can use an All Purpose Acknowledgment, but in Ohio, there is such thing as a Corporate Acknowledgment and Attorney in Fact Acknowledgment.

Where Can You Find Your State’s Wording?
If you visit our find a notary page, you can click on your state and find current notary wording for your state. Or Google your states notary wording. Example: “California Acknowledgment Wording.”

Sample California Jurat Verbiage

State of California
County of Lake

Subscribed and sworn to (or affirmed) before me on this 5th day of January, 2017, by Jedadiah Goldminer, proved to me on the basis of satisfactory evidence to be the person(s) who appeared before me.

(Seal)

Signature_______________________

Loose Certificates
Many documents have preprinted notary wording on them. However, it is legal to attach a loose certificate form using a staple. NNA is a great source for Notary certificate pads such as Acknowledgment Certificates, Jurat Certificates, and even Copy Certification by Document Custodian if you want to get fancy.

Filling out the Forms
It is common on Notary certificate forms to have sections where there is he/she/they or signature(s). You have to cross out the non-applicable word(s). If you are Notarizing a woman, cross out the he and the they and the (s). If you are notarizing a man and a woman in the same notary act, cross out the he and the she, but keep the (s). If you are notarizing a man who used to be a women — your guess is as good as mine — good luck, you’ll need it.

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January 17, 2017

Notary vs. Signing Agent

Filed under: Popular on Linked In,Popular on Twitter,Technical & Legal — Tags: , — admin @ 12:21 am

We write about this topic every so often. It is so basic and so critical that all new Notaries should understand. Every year, hundreds of thousands of Americans become Notaries. As Notaries they can perform tasks such as Acknowledging signatures, performing Jurats, administering Oaths, and other tasks which might be state specific. Notaries can hold their heads up high as their function is to identify signers, keep good records (in most states at least) and deter or prevent fraud. But, that is only if they are doing their job correctly — and most states do not vet their Notaries well enough to know the difference.

What is a Notary?
(1) A Notary Public is a state appointed official that is authorized to perform particular Notary functions. All states allow Notaries to perform Acknowledgments, Jurats, and Oaths, while some states allow Notaries to act as an official witness, safety box opener, proof of execution, protests, take Depositions, and more.

(2) A Notary receives a formal certificate of commission from their state, and a commission number.

(3) Many states require a Notary to have an official notary seal that has the Notary’s name, commission number, expiration date, state andcounty.

(4) Many states require the Notary to keep a bound and sequential official journal of notarial acts.

To be short, a Notary can perform certain basic Notary functions that their state allows them to function. Their state offers them a formal certificate of commission, and normally allows them to get one or two official Notary seals with their name, commission number, expiration date, city and state, etc. Notaries use prescribed state specific wording for particular Notary acts and that wording can be used on loose certificates that they can purchase from businesses who sell Notary supplies. A Notary is a public official, although most Notaries don’t understand that on an emotional level. They are appointed by their state as an official who will uphold (or at least are supposed to) the laws of their state at all costs.

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January 13, 2017

The Notary Train

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 12:44 am

Welcome aboard the Notary (choo-choo) Train.
Today is going to be a busy day. We are traveling from Fort Stockton, TX to Tuc (choo-choo) son today. I wish you all a very nice trip. And since this is The Notary Train, if you need anything Notarized, you are in luck. We have in-house or in-train Notaries commissioned in Texas, New Mexico and Arizona just waiting to (choo-choo) help you.

10pm

ATTENDANT: Welcome aboard. May I see some ID please?

RALPH: Here it is. It is an official TX Driver License.

ATTENDANT: I’ll need a blood sample too.

RALPH: I thought you’d never ask. But, I don’t give that out to strangers. But, how about a thumb print?

ATTENDANT: A right thumbprint will do. I was just kidding about the blood samples. After all, a simple retinal scan would be just as good.

12:10am

RALPH: Hi, I need this document signed. And can you backdate?

TX NOTARY: Umm, isn’t that illegal?

RALPH: Never mind. I’ll ask the other Notary. HEY, I need this document Notarized.

NOTARY #2: When do you need it done?

RALPH: Yesterday!

NOTARY #2: No problem, we are about to cross through a time-zone change on our way to El Paso. Once we have passed it, it will be yesterday.

RALPH: So, you can backdate?

NOTARY #2: I won’t have to. In the mean time, let’s get some Notary snacks at the snack bar. How about a crepe with chocolate sauce that is dispensed from a leaky Notary Seal?

RALPH: Cool. Can I get bananas too?

NOTARY #2: Yes, but you cannot emboss them.

RALPH: Oh, too bad. So, who pours the tea around here?

NOTARY #2: Oh, we have an official TEA agent do that along with transporting blood samples.

RALPH: I love this train. I love it even more when you take a plane ride and arrive at your destination before you left your departure point. That’s a real brain teaser.

TEA AGENT: Can I offer you some tea, or a blood sample?

RALPH: Oh no, I stopped being a vampire years ago.

TEA AGENT: I didn’t, now you know why I love my job so much!

SALLY: Why is this train taking so long? I hope we get to Tucson before my commission expires.

TEA AGENT: Your commission never expires on The Notary Train baby! It’s good for life! By the way, you have a pretty neck.

SALLY: What kind of a psycho are you? Oh getting a phone call.

CALLER: I am trying to track down a particular Notary who did a signing for me in 1968.

SALLY: Well, on The Notary Train, we have lots of tracks if you want to do some tracking. But, you might have to call the Secretary of State. Good luck!

RALPH: I just love The Notary Train. It’s the only Notarial entity that is commissioned in one county and expires in an entirely different one. That’s a great concept — almost as good as reverse time travel.

NOTARY #2: Okay Ralph. Time to do your notarization without backdating. It’s 11:30pm Mountain Time on the 3rd now. Whip out those documents! It’s party time!

RALPH: Okay, let’s do the deed — I mean sign the deed. By the way, why is that guy staring at my neck still?

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November 30, 2016

Notary Acknowledgment Wording

Filed under: Popular on Linked In,Technical & Legal — Tags: , , , , , — admin @ 11:11 pm

If you are a Notary, or want to get something Notarized, you will have to deal with Notary wording and perhaps Notary Acknowledgment Wording. There are various types of Notary acts, and Acknowledgments are the most common with Jurats in second place. The process of getting something notarized normally involves the signer personally appearing before a Notary Public, showing ID, signing a journal, etc. The Notary needs to fill in the notary wording on the certificate and then sign and stamp the paperwork. Here are some facts about Acknowledgments.

(1) Certificates
The instrument that contains Notary Acknowledgment wording is called a “Certificate.” A certificate can be a separate piece of paper that is added by staple to a legal document. Or, the certificate wording could be embedded in the document below the signature section. In either case, the Notary certificate must contain notary verbiage specific to the state requirements where the notarization is taking place. The format of the certificate typically includes a venue, body of the acknowledgment and then a signature area at the bottom. There is often an additional or optional information section as well. The Notary’s seal must be affixed near the signature section of the certificate whether it is a loose certificate or boiler plate wording embedded in the actual document.

(2) State Specific Wording
If the notarization is being recorded in one state, but being notarized in another, then the Notary Acknowledgment wording must be substantially similar to the approved and required state wording where the document is being recorded. Notary Acknowledgment Wording differs from state to state. You can Google your state’s Notary wording if you like, or visit our find a notary page for more detailed information.

(3) Jurats
Please also keep in mind that some people call all Notary forms a “Jurat” while a real Jurat is substantially different from an Acknowledgment as it contains an Oath (by definition) and requires signing in the presence of a Notary. State rules for Jurats also differ from state to state, so you need to find out what the rules are in the state that you are being Notarized in are.

(4) Sections in an Acknowledgment

(a) Venue (State of Nevada; County of Clark)
(b) The words, “Appeared before me”
(c) The date (i.e. 08-04, 2012)
(d) That the signer acknowledges signing the instrument that their name is subscribed to within
(e) Name of the signer and the notary.
(f) Proof of identity of the signer
(g) Signature (seal) of the notary
(h) A place for the notary to affix their official notary seal.

(5) Optional Information
There is also an additional information section on Acknowledgments where you can indicate the number of pages in the document, the document name, and other identifying factors. To deter fraud, it is a prudent habit to fill out as much additional information as possible and even get a thumbprint on the certificate as well as in the journal.

(6) Sample Acknowledgment Wording

State of California
County of Los Angeles

On 5-15-2011 before me, John Doe, notary public, personally appear Joe Barber who proved to me on the basis of satisfactory evidence to be the person whose name is subscribed to the within instrument and who acknowledged to me that he executed the same in his authorized capacity and by his signature(s) on the instrument the person, or entity upon behalf of which the person acted, executed the instrument.

I certify under PENALTY of PERJURY under the laws of the state of California that the foregoing paragraph is true and correct.

WITNESS my hand and official seal

—————————————— (affix stamp here)
(Signature of Notary)

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November 14, 2016

Trump caught on mike with a Notary

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Popular on Facebook (A little) — admin @ 11:10 pm

Trump Caught on Hot Mike with a Notary!

We’ve all heard the scandalous 2005 tape by now of Trump with Billy Bush talking about how he can grope women with reckless abandon, simply because he’s a star and can get away with anything. Well now 123notary has unearthed an exclusive tape from 2006 of Trump talking to a notary between takes on season 3 of The Apprentice!

Trump: Did you see that babe’s signature? That thing had more curves on it than she does. I give it a ten.

Notary: Of course I saw it. I’m a notary. Although I prefer the professional “witness” over “see”. I also prefer that other signature over there.

Trump: That’s a flat signature. A flat signature can’t be a ten. Speaking of curves, I’d like to grade her on a curve. I give her a nine. Put it this way: I wouldn’t kick her out of bed. And I can get her into bed, because I’m a star. Now, if I was grading Rosie O’Donnell on a curve, she’d be a negative three. Imagine how low she’d be if I wasn’t grading her on a curve?

Notary: Mr. Trump, why are you groping my seal?

Trump: I’m a star. I can grope anything I want to. I like how it’s not flat. Do you remember that contestant who made fun of my hair?

Notary: The one you said “you’re fired” to?

Trump: I’m suing her. I want you to notarize a demand letter.

Notary: Are you demanding I do that?

Trump: Notarize two demand letters.

Trump notices curvy contestant coming his way.

Trump: Ooh-la-la. I better down these Tic Tacs. Not that my breath isn’t the best breath that anyone ever had.

Notary: Better than a baby’s breath?

Trump: Please. My breath has it all over a baby’s breath. I like the formula for obscene wealth. Not the formula you suck on when you’re not busy sucking on… Hello, my darling!

Curvy contestant: Hi, Mr. Trump.

Trump: Good thing I’m between wives, but hey, if I can cheat on my taxes, I can cheat on wives, am I right? Don’t answer that question, I’m always right. I did have that threesome once when I was literally between wives.

Curvy contestant: I like your hair.

Notary: (Re: not having to sue her.) At least it’s not three demand letters.

Trump: Want to touch it?

Curvy contestant touches it.

Trump: It’s real. As real as what I’m staring at right now.

Curvy contestant: They’re fake.

Trump: Make that…

Notary: Three demand letters. (to curvy contestant) You just implied his hair is fake.

Curvy contestant: Would you sign my breasts?

Trump: I’d be happy to. Cancel the demand letter.

Notary: Would you like me to witness that?

Curvy contestant: Pervert.

Notary: No, I’m a notary. I can help make his signature on your breasts official.

Trump: Even if your rack isn’t “official,” am I right? Don’t answer that, I’m always right. Let’s see, where’s my Trump pen? Unbelievable pen. Every Trump University graduate gets one.

Trump signs away. A little too hard. In a beat, we hear… PHTTTTTTTTTTT. At this deflated moment, Trump responds…

Trump: Your nine just became a one.

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October 15, 2016

How can I find a French speaking Notary?

Filed under: Public Interest — Tags: , , , , , — admin @ 9:42 pm

Where can I find a Notary who speaks French?
How do I find a French speaking Notary?
How do I find a Notary who speaks French?
Look no further. 123notary.com has many French speaking Notaries on board. Just look up a Notary by zip code and then use the language filter at the top right of the site. You can enter in the name of any language such as Spanish, French, Japanese, Vietnamese, American Sign Language, or more! In fact, we have French speaking Notaries in almost all states and metros.

How good is their French language proficiency?
On 123notary.com, we have many Notaries who speak French. The degree of fluency varies from Notary to Notary as some are conversational while others are native speakers. A handful are from French speaking families who grew up in America and might be excellent at conversation but not as proficient at business oriented communication. So, test your French speaking Notary out over the phone to make sure they are up to your standards before hiring them!

Notary French — Attorneys vs. Non-Attorneys
Please be advised that Notaries in the United States are seldom Attorneys and non-Attorney Notaries may not give legal advice. Most Notaries are also not authorized to draft legal documents. There are affordable legal support centers where they can help you draft documents. Please make sure that your document is completely drafted before contacting a Notary Public from 123notary.com.

Immigration Advice
Notaries cannot give advice about immigration matters unless they are specifically licensed to do so. For immigration questions, please contact the proper authorities.

Notarizing in French?
Notaries may Notarize a document that is in French, however the Notary wording would be in English for the notarization. Some states require the Notary to be able to understand the document. Other states require the Notary to be able to communicate directly with the borrower in any language they both can communicate with. Please learn the laws of your state and how they apply to notarizing foreign language documents. The actual Notary wording must be in English if it is to be notarized in any of the 50 states in the USA. Each state has their own official Acknowledgment and Jurat Notarial wording which the Notary is responsible for knowing. The Notary wording can be included at the end of the document. However, the Notary can also staple a loose certificate form to the document and affix their seal to that certificate after it has been completely filled out. Signers will be required to sign the Notary journal in states where Notary journals are used (which includes most states.)

Oaths in French?
Some Notary acts such as Jurats, Oaths, or other acts that include Oaths such as swearing in credible witnesses require the Notary to administer an Oath. An Oath for an English language document or French language document can be performed in the language of your choice. If the signer or affiant feels more comfortable in French and the Notary knows French, you can conduct your Oath in French.

How can I get a French language document notarized?
As stated above, some states require the Notary to understand the language of the document while others don’t. However, the language of the notarization itself would be in English. You can find a notary on 123notary who speaks French to assist you in this matter. Just visit our Advanced Search page and look up a French Speaking Notary by zip code!

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http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6498

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October 5, 2016

Notary Casino 2

Filed under: Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , — admin @ 11:59 am

Welcome to the Notary Casino where your dreams can come true. There are many Notaries here as guests, and also working here in various capacities. Notaries were hired to witness players counting cards to see if they are cheating. Just don’t mess with the big boss (they call him the embosser) of the casino otherwise he’ll make sure your term expires.

Entertainment
For entertainment, there was a Notary doing Notary tricks.
They had a Notary would could make a signature disappear. It was written in time released invisible ink. Then, they had an Elvis impersonator who could make signers disappear. The henchmen of “the embosser” could make people who didn’t pay their gambling debts disappear, but that’s a different story. The third Notary specialized in doing card tricks with ID’s and could make an ID appear out of nowhere with a little help from some friends in China (who didn’t get caught… yet…)

Dining
Drinks at the Casino were all commissioned by their local county clerk. There was Rum from The Domincan Republic; County of Santa Maria; Issueation Date Feb 02, 2004. Instead of expiration dates, the alcohol had issueation dates so you would know how aged it was as 12 to 21 years is considered perfect. For dinner they offered a seal steak and Apostille cut oatmeal for breakfast. The squid ink pasta was a huge hit with Notaries as they loved the fact that they could finally eat ink and brag about it to their friends.

Staff
The staff is very attentive and they acknowledge all people who walk into the casino. They also witness all of the guests, and their movements (creepy.) Notaries were hired to witness witnesses — if that makes sense. (sounds like Russia during the cold-war)

Games
The most popular slot machine is called Signing Company. This game is a real gamble because if you win, you don’t know if it will pay you, or how long it will take to get paid. One Notary was glued to this machine for sixty days and only left to go to the bathroom. To win this game, instead of getting three cherries, you need to get signatures, all with middle initials.

The Wheel
Finally, this casino wanted visitors to spin the wheel, but only when they were about to depart. Each section on the wheel had a different prize or lack of a prize. You could win a contract with signing companies that actually paid if you hit 10. 11 was a dud. 12 was a date with Jeremy from 123notary. 13 was “spin again”. 14 was nothing. 15 was win $100. But, the grand prize was a top spot on 123notary and a collection agency that would pay you all of the money owed to you by signing companies (after their collection fee was deducted) and then they would sue the companies to get their money.

The Fedex Box
All visits to the Notary Casino end at the Fedex box. Any money you won will be Fedexed to you in the form of a cashier’s check sent to your residence. Don’t lose the tracking number! And remember, what happens in the Notary Casino stays at the Notary Casino.

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