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May 27, 2011

NNA Certified Signers who failed our test!

NNA Certified Signing Agents who failed our test!

This story goes back many years, perhaps close to a decade.  123notary.com started off very simply without much technology.  We couldn’t afford to do any more than barely build the site back in those days.  I had to decide whether to have a certification or not.  It looked more professional if we had our own certification. But, it has always been like pulling teeth to convince the NNA certified signers to even consider taking our test.
 
Notaries couldn’t answer simple questions without a long pause.
In the old days, we used to give our certification test by phone. It was a dozen or so basic questions about loan signing that any mediocre signing agent with hardly any experience could probably answer.  What I noticed is that those who passed the National Notary Association’s signing agent exam (NNA certified signers) failed our test roughly 70% of the time.  There was a lot of “umm” and “ahm”, and “hmmm” during the phone exam.  Their CSA exam was open book and without any time limit, so they were used to being able to get away with thinking forever to answer simple questions such as, “Where can you find the Rate in a loan”.  I can’t think of a simpler question.  The harder questions threw most people. I got sick of being patient and waiting for people to answer ridiculously easy questions.  The only thought that ran through my head was that if I were a borrower, I would throw these notaries out of my house if they couldn’t answer simple questions.
 
The timed test
So, then we got some fancy programming done and made an online test.  I was tired of waiting two minutes for the answers to simple questions, so a timed test was the only way for the notaries to prove their manhood or ladyhood. There were revolving questions and a timer. We had a few technical problems along the way, and many didn’t like my style of questions.  As time progressed, we got rid of the “ambiguous” questions, and added a few practical marketing questions.  We also tried to have questions specific to the state where the notary claimed to be, but that turned out to be unpopular, so we dropped it eventually.    The bottom line, was that most notaries couldn’t handle the time pressure — even the NNA certified signing agents.
 
The ex-Mortgage broker’s story
I had a few people who worked in Title or Mortgage houses who assured me that it was a joke that they even had to take my exam.  After all, they had been doing this for 20 years.  So, many people (including NNA certified signers) tried to convince me that they didn’t NEED to take my dumb exam.  Almost all of these overly confident know-it-alls FAILED my test, and then wasted my time arguing with me.  They didn’t read the prep book, and they didn’t know their basics about loan signing regardless of their background.  There is a lot of overlap between Title and Mortgage work and loan signing, but there are additional things you need to know to be a good signer. It is a different profession.
 
What does our test prove?
Roughly 25% of our notaries on board have passed our basic certification exam. The others either failed, or never tried in the first place. If people had spent the same amount of time studying for the test as they did arguing with us about why they shouldn’t have to take the test, their business would be a lot different.  123notary certification proves that you know your basics, and that you can function under extreme time pressure without breaking. That says a lot.  Most people can not handle the pressure.  When I created the test, I could pass it in three minutes and Carmen passed it in four and a half minutes.  Test takers were allowed six and a half minutes to ensure that the majority who studied hard would pass the first time.
 
Does it matter what you think about our test?
What I think about my test, or what you or Carmen think about my test doesn’t matter even slightly.  The browsers care tremendously about my test, and (news flash!) they are the ones who are paying you.  123notary certified signers are three times as likely to get work.  Even browsers who didn’t know what the certification meant, and who had a regular document to be signed like an affidavit which had nothing to do with loan signing still chose certified signers if they could.  Ten years ago, I used 123notary as my primary source of marketing my personal mobile notary work.  Time after time I got called at 11pm to notarize a simple form.  I kept hearing, “We chose you because you were certified and the others were not”.

You might also like:

Notaries who failed the California notary exam
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=21433

Roseanne called the NNA when she thought she as calling the NRA
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20503

Need an NNA Alternative?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19234

For background checks, NNA & Sterling come highly recommended
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18835

Notary Etiquette from A to Z
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=300

From 3 jobs per week to 3 jobs per day!

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January 15, 2011

Roseanne calls the NNA when she thought she was calling the NRA.

Filed under: Sit-Coms — Tags: , , — admin @ 9:10 am

Speaking of rebooting a show that doesn’t deserve to be rebooted. Here’s what happens when a Trump supporter becomes a Notary Public.

Roseanne was using Google to look up the NRA, but due to a typing error, found the NNA instead, and then started reading.

ROSEANNE: Hmm, this NNA organization sounds really helpful. They teach you everything you need to know to be a Notary, plus they sell ammunition… um, I mean supplies like Acknowledgment pads. I wonder if you can shoot an Acknowledgment.

DAN: Hey, shoot me over an Acknowledgment!

ROSEANNE: Oh, so you can shoot an Acknowledgment. Cool. I’m gonna call the NNA. (ring ring) Hey NNA, what would you carry if you were on a Notary trip?

NNA: Oh, well, we have an NNA carry-all bag.

ROSEANNE: I like these people already (yelling) Hey Dan, these folks have a carry-all bag! Hey NNA, can you fit a dead moose in one of your bags?

NNA: Um, I’m afraid that these bags are more for Notary supplies and can fit a journal, and a few pads of paper, seals, etc.

ROSEANNE: Well can you teach me how to operate one of them seals, take it apart, and clean it real nice… and reload it?

NNA: We can sell you some replacement ink. You just press the seal down to operate it.

ROSEANNE: Ahh (nasal), do I need any ear protection headset when I shoot your seal gun off?

NNA: I think you’re confusing us with the NRA.

ROSEANNE: I just want you people to know that I support second amendment — the right to bear Notarial arms.

DAN: Honey, you have the right to bear arms, but till you lose a little weight I’d wear long sleeves if I were you.

ROSEANNE: Stay out of it. If that ain’t the kettle calling the pot black. And then speaking of pot, can you operate a loaded notary seal under the influence of Marijuana?

NNA: Um, I believe that is a state specific question that is not covered by Notary law. Please consult an Attorney.

ROSEANNE: Do you know any Attorneys who smoke pot, or Attorney Notaries? Well, they’d have to smoke tons of pot if they would want to be Notaries, right?

NNA: The Notary profession is a very respected profession that has been around for hundreds of years. Please do not defile our profession. We gain tremendous pride from reading about our Notaries of the year as they contribute tremendous integrity to our profession.

ROSEANNE: Well, whaddo I gotta do to be Notary of the year?

DAN: Wait for a really crappy year when everybody else really sucks.

NNA: Well, let’s first start with getting a Notary commission and learning our Notary Basics, shall we?

ROSEANNE: Is there a way I can become Notary of the year on false pretenses? I’m a good liar. I lie about my age and my sex life. Hey Dan, I’m 30 right?

DAN: Yeah, and you’re really hot too, and I’m not just talking about your flashes.

ROSEANNE: See how good I am at telling the truth about myself in a deceitful way?

NNA: You see maam, the Notary profession is based on integrity. The role of the Notary is to keep accurate records, deter fraud, and be completely honest in all transactions.

ROSEANNE: You missed your calling in life, you should have been a church lady, isn’t that special? Or a mime, that way I wouldn’t have to hear you.

NNA: Well just let us know when you are commissioned, and we’ll take it from there. Just make sure you get this all done before the end of Notary season. (hangs up.)

NNA PERSON #2: There’s no such thing as Notary season.

NNA: You have to make hunting references when you’re talking to this lady otherwise she can’t relate to anything you’re saying.

NNA PERSON #2: Okay, time for lunch. Are you up for anything gamey?

NNA: In Chatsworth, CA? Good luck!

.

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Letter to the NNA about Notary Testing
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19401

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http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19234

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January 13, 2023

Top Mobile Notary Challenges in 2023

As mobile notaries, the world constantly changes and presents new challenges for our profession. Every year, new updates in law and regulations affect our practice. So it’s important to stay informed of what other professionals in the industry are experiencing so we can continue to do our jobs effectively and safely. In this blog post, we’ll be looking at some of the top mobile notary challenges that will likely arise during 2023 – from adapting to digital platforms amidst a global pandemic to keeping up with ever-evolving state laws – as well as how best to prepare for these hurdles ahead!

Increased Regulation and Compliance Requirements

Being a notary public is no small task! With an ever-increasing layer of regulations and compliance requirements to abide by, it’s important for notaries not only to stay up-to-date on laws governing notarial acts but to ensure that their notary service is top-notch. Mobile notaries, traveling notaries, and signing agents provide added convenience for clients seeking notarization services beyond the traditional brick-and-mortar approach. As such, notaries must recognize that increased regulation and compliance requirements come with the territory and be prepared to meet them in areas ranging from personal identification verification to data security protocols. After all, notaries are really providing an invaluable service – one that requires vigilance on their part in order to execute properly.

More States Legalizing Cannabis and Its Impact on Notarizations

With more states legalizing cannabis, notary services have never been in higher demand! From notarizing banking transactions to notarizing documents related to cannabis-related agreements, notaries are rapidly adapting their services to meet these growing demands. Mobile notary and traveling notary services like signing agents make this work possible with flexible scheduling, location options, and quick turnarounds. Today’s notaries are required to understand the effects of cannabis laws within the state they work in—and as more states legalize cannabis, notaries are rising to the challenge with an understanding of not only their state laws but regional ones too. The need for savvy notaries has never been greater!

Increased Use of AI and Other Technologies in the Notary Industry

The notary industry is no exception to the technological advancements in automation, with many notary services embracing advantages like AI and mobile notarization. Mobile notaries provide notarizing convenience to customers by visiting them directly at their homes or workplace instead of the other way around, and they can also perform notarial services remotely. Signing Agents present businesses with many opportunities, such as booking more notary assignments and being away from their office while doing it – improving efficiency while on the move! Automation allows notaries to increase access to and quality of notary services; plus, going digital has enabled notaries to work faster and become more organized. The combination of modern technology and a notary’s expertise creates an efficient yet secure process for all kinds of transactions, making it one of the top mobile notary challenges in 2023.

Continued Growth in Remote Working and Its Effects on Notaries

The notary profession has experienced a seismic shift since the introduction of remote working technology. While notaries have yet to experience the same growth across all sectors, those in the notary public, mobile notary, traveling notary, and signing agent spaces have seen particularly dramatic gains due to their ability to provide notarization services from any physical location. This means that as more companies turn towards remote approaches for workplace operations, notary service providers have seen benefits through increased business. This shift bodes well for notaries looking to expand their services online – something that would have seemed next to impossible for the average signing agent or mobile notary not long ago.

More States Legalizing Digital Notarization

Digital notarization is rapidly becoming the notary norm, quickly changing the traditional notarization landscape. As more states legalize digital notarization, mobile notaries and notary services must evolve to meet the increasingly strict criteria. This means notaries who act as traveling notaries or signing agents will become even more popular, as they are both cost-effective and able to meet the ever-hastening pace of new technology and ideas in the notarization process. Not only that but their expertise and presence in person can help make digital notarization a cinch for both notary and customer alike!

Changes in the Real Estate Market and How They Impact Notaries

When it comes to notary services, the real estate market is at the heart of it. From mobile notaries and signing agents that travel from place to place to notary publics who perform notarizations at their own location, notaries play a large part in helping facilitate transactions for buying and selling a home. So when the real estate market sees changes—be it an increase or decrease in residential sales or rising interest rates—notaries must be ready to adjust their services accordingly. Whether this means taking on more projects if there is an influx of business or partnering with other notaries for added flexibility and capacity, notaries must stay agile as changes come about to maintain their notary business and keep up with the ever-changing landscape of the real estate market.

Expectations as We Move Into 2023

In the past year, we’ve seen more changes in the notary industry than ever. From increased regulation to the legalization of cannabis, there’s been a lot to keep up with. Mobile notary challenges will persist as we move into 2023, and it doesn’t look like things are slowing down any time soon. You can expect continued growth in remote working and digital notarization, as well as changes in the real estate market that will impact notaries across the country. But no matter what challenges arise, one thing remains constant: the quality of the notaries like you who are dedicated to providing excellent service. Thank you for everything you do to ensure that our community thrives!

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January 28, 2022

Bartender Notary: A reverse mortgage on the rocks!

Filed under: Humorous Posts,Popular on Twitter 2011 — Tags: , , — admin @ 11:54 pm

This was originally published in 2013.

Signing with the Bartender-Notary: Reverse Mortgage on the Rocks

The bartender notary knocks on the door. “Hi, I’m the bartender notary. I’m here to do your signing.”
“Sure, come right in,” says Joe the borrower.

They go to the dining room table to do the signing. The bartender notary looks around and says, “Hey, isn’t that a wet bar in the back of your living room?”
“Yes.”
“Would you mind if we sat over there?; I would feel much more comfortable sitting over there,” the bartender notary says.
Joe goes behind the bar and asks, “Where am I supposed to sit?”
“No, I’m the bartender so I go behind the bar. you sit on the stool on the other side,” the notary insists.

“Aren’t we gonna do the signing?” asks Joe.
The notary opens his briefcase and takes out a few flasks of non-alcoholic drinks, a tall glass, and a little umbrella. “I’m frustrated, because , when I go to signings, no one ever offers me a drink…maybe after half an hour they might offer me some tap water if I’m lucky…So I decided to turn the tables around…or the counters, as the case may be…and offer the signers a drink. I make my own orange-cranberry spritzer…would you like one of those…or would you like a virgin lemonade? I’ve got everything except ice.”

“Make me a strawberry lime spritzer…and can you muddle the fruits a little? Wait—” says Joe. “Aren’t we supposed to be doing a signing?”
“I’m the bartender notary; I talk bar talk. It’s my trademark to serve drinks and make smalltalk before we do the signing.”
“Ok, I’ll play along,” says Joe.

“How about those Dodgers, Joe? Who are they gonna trade?”
“Well, right now, I’m ready to trade notaries—if we don’t get started with the signing right away.”
“Ok, let’s do the signing,” the notary shrugs.
“Actually,” Joe says, “my reverse mortgage was on the rocks since the beginning of the application process, so I decided to go for a refinance– straight up.”

“Ok,” the notary says.“Your first document is a Deed of Trust. May I see some ID, sir?”
The borrower says, “What, I don’t look over 21?”
“Just a precaution, sir.”

The bartender notary opens his journal and begins to record the types of documents, the patron-borrower’s ID, and the types of drinks served at the signing.

The notary says, “This is your Deed of Trust. Your loan amount is right here; please initial all pages of the document and sign on the last page.”

They get to the Note; the notary says, “This is your Note. Your interest rate is 4.5%. The last loan I signed was an adjustable rate mortgage. I asked the borrower if he would like his interest rate shaken or stirred when the adjustment date comes in two years. He didn’t laugh. He didn’t think it was very funny. I’m lucky he didn’t trade me. Maybe it was how I said it…”

Then the notary asks, “So how’s the wife treating you?”
“Oh, I canned her years ago… I have a girlfriend,” says Joe.
“Do you think she will be in need of a bartender-notary anytime soon?”
“No she lives in an apartment. She won’t need to refinance anything in this lifetime.”

“So waddaya think–those interest rates—are they gonna go up or down?” asks the bartender notary.
“Oh, the Fed’s gotta keep it about the same—or you notaries will all be out of a job!”

“Next, we are going to look at the TIL. This is your Truth in Lending disclosure. Your APR is right here. So are we going into Iran? Whaddaya think the chances are that we invade Iran?”
Joe the signer looks at the TIL and says, “I’d give it about a 4.97%… Hey, I thought we’re not supposed to talk about politics at the signing?”
“That’s my trademark, I have to talk about politics because I’m the bartender notary… that’s what bartenders talk about. Would you like some bar snacks? We have peanuts, wasabi chips … Did you hear about LAX Vineyards new wine blend? It’s a cross between a cab, a merlot, and a shuttle. It’s very popular with bartenders. Did you hear about the wine documentary from Ireland? It’s called Cork Uncorked… There’s a special kind of wine for a signing… Did you hear about the Reverse Mortgage Cabernet? It’s rich in tannins and has two subtle notes…black cherry, and a hint of cocoa…and a smooth finish…assuming that we don’t have to call the lender.”

Joe asks, “What’s next?”
“The next document is your HUD.”

They go to the HUD. Joe the borrower asks, “Oh, so is my strawberry lime spritzer documented in the HUD?”
“Yeah, I think it’s right there under the termite inspection…Let’s just sign the rest of these documents; I have to close up soon…Last call,” says the notary.

They finish signing the rest of the documents.

The notary takes the borrower’s copy of the Deed of Trust and places it next to the signed Deed of Trust. Joe looks at it and says, “There are two Deeds of Trust. I’m seeing double. I thought that strawberry lime spritzer was non-alcoholic…”

“No! These are your borrower’s copies. Are you gonna be ok—or should I call you a cab?”
Joe: “I’m already home…I live here.”

Tweets:
(1) I’m frustrated because when I go to signings, nobody ever offers me a drink!
(2) Bartender notary prefers to do his signings sitting on stools near the wet-bar.
(3) I’m the bartender notary; I talk bar talk. It’s my trademark to serve drinks and make smalltalk before signing.”

.

You might also like:

Compilation of Notary Stories
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=21898

Compilation of virtual comedy Notary articles
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17693

Compilation of posts about Notary etiquette
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20505

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January 23, 2022

The Notary, The Mafia & The Fedex Drop Box

This was originally published many years ago.

An uneventful signing
It was a gray Monday afternoon in the first week of November. Kary went to her signing with the Thompsons. They signed the documents without too much reading or complaining. Kary had one other signing after that. When all was done, she made her way to the Fedex drop box. She had a habit of always going to that same drop box. It was near her home, and it felt like a safe place to go at night, being a single woman.

Luckily for her she was nowhere near the San Diego mayor’s office.

The Sopranos were en route to the same location she was
This poor woman’s luck — she ran into someone who was still mourning the loss of the great James Gandolfini AKA Tony Soprano. He was such a fan of the show that he decided to pull a mafioso type move on this poor unexpecting woman. This thug Tony Baritone had been in the drug trade for years, but wanted to step it up a notch. His old M.O. was meeting for the swap in a dark alley, giving them the briefcase, taking the package — you know the drill. But, he wanted to do it more like they do in the movies this time. This was his first attempt at simulating the panache of his television alter-ego.

Just about to drop the FedEx and…
So, this woman was just about to drop her package in the box. Her finger was on the handle of the box. She noticed a large garbage backing up about 50 feet away. She disregarded the truck whose distinctive oder was wafting her way. She put the Fedex in the Fedex drop box, and then proceded back to her car. The garbage truck nearly ran her car off the road as she left her parking space. It was so abrupt, she stopped the car to get out and see what this maniac’s problem was.

The garbage truck backed up
The truck had backed up almost into the Fedex box, and had jaws that clamped the Fedex drop box and tore it from its bearings and lifted it into the truck. The woman started screaming, “What are you doing? Are you crazy?”

Blonde #2 appears
Then another blonde lady appeared out of nowhere who looked almost exactly like the notary. She was the same age, same hair color, and same height, and also had a Fedex package that she wanted to drop. The other lady looked very puzzled. She said to herself, “Wait a second, my instructions were to put the Fedex in the drop box and leave — but, that truck just took the Fedex drop box away!” Blonde #2 (also an unnatural blonde) was unbeknowingly carrying $10,000,000 in drug money that she was to deposit in the Fedex box — which was to be removed by the garbage truck. But, their plan got foiled.

We have to get rid of the witness
The driver said to his friend, “We have two problems — the money is not in the Fedex Box, AND, there’s a witness. We need to get rid of the witness, but I can’t tell them apart.”
His friend said,“You have to look for the roots, real blondes have roots — our blond is a real blonde!”
Driver: “No she ain’t, I’ve seen the broad before, she has a different hairstyle every several months”
Friend: “So, you can tell the two chicks apart!”
Driver: “Not from this distance without my glasses. Let’s get my money first. The broad with the package has the money.”

The mafia chases the blonde
So, the driver and his friend jump out of the truck (which is parked in the middle of the boulevard) and run towards the blonde with the Fedex. The irony is that she doesn’t know that they are the intended recipients of the package because her instructions were only to “Put the Fedex in the drop box”. So, she runs away from these scary people — who are actually her boyfriend’s best friends, and the ones who gave the $10,000 to her boyfriend to pay her to do the drop. Meanwhile the notary lady decides to chase after these scumbags to get them to give her package back.

She loses them and then finds them
In the heat of the chase, she loses them, and then finds them again. The other blonde escapes from these thugs, finds the drop box in the back of the garbage truck, puts it in, and runs away. Meanwhile, notary lady catches up to the thugs, and throws her embosser at them — leaving a raised seal of disapproval (in the form of a bruise) on the now unconscious mafia garbage truck driver’s left temple. The irony of the story is that the character with the concealed weapon is not one the mafia characters, but is the notary who was carrying a stainless steel embosser.

The Notary recovers the loan docs
After that, the driver’s friend ran away and the notary proceeded to the unattended garbage truck to pick up her package. She picked up the highest package in the box in such a hurry, she didn’t realize that she had picked up $10,000,000 in dirty drug money. She gets in her car and drives off with her “loan docs” finally in her possession again. She calls the signing company and lets them know about the problem. Then, she proceeds to her nearest staffed Fedex station — where there won’t be any garbage trucks (let’s hope). She pats the package in glee to have gotten it back after a small altercation. But, she notices a distinct bulge in the package that didn’t feel like loan documents.

But, what she had was not really the loan docs after all
The five seconds after she realized that her loan documents were not in her possession, she saw a large garbage truck driving down the street.

Mental note to self: “Take out the garbage”

Tweets:
(1) A notary bumps into Toni Baratone at a FedEx drop box
(2) The garbage truck tore the FedEx drop box from its bearings and took it away!
(3) “We need to get rid of the witness, but I can’t tell the 2 blondes apart”
(4) The Notary takes $10 million in drug money to the Title company by accident.

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The Flo-tary and the name your price tool
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16194

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Don’t put the FedEx in the drop box
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=2831

More on Snapdocs, the Uber of the Notary industry
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16236

My interpretation of how the Notary industry went South
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16500

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January 14, 2022

Psych Notary Episode

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Popular on Facebook (some),Popular Overall,Sit-Coms — Tags: — admin @ 11:54 pm

This was originally published many years ago.

There is a sit-com on Ion television that you can sometimes get on other cable stations called Psych. It’s about a psychic Shawn Spencer and his sidekick Burton Guster. In any case, the psychic is a fake half the time who sees real clues that nobody else saw him see and then pretends to have a vision.

In this episode, a Notary is found dead and his stamp is found missing. The detectives arrive on the scene.

LASSITER: The body is dead — and it’s cold. It could have been lying here for a good seven to ten hours in my estimate. The cause of death seems unclear.

JULES: Let’s take the body to the lab and see if there is any sign of food poisoning. The victim seems to be a Notary Public, and you know how those type of people are — you know — eating on the road on the run.

SHAWN: You’re right. He might have eaten a poisoned fish filet or….wait a second, I’m getting something… (puts his right two fingers to his head) This MAN, did not die from accidental food poisoning (pause)… he was murdered.

LASSITER: You and your unsubstantiated hunches. I just can’t stand it. And what’s worse is that you’re right more than half the time.

SHAWN: Some people say that I’m talented. Oh, and I’m sorry about your tragic breakup.

LASSITER: Yeah… so am I. I really fell for her.

SHAWN: Don’t despair Lassie, there are other fish in the sea… and coral, particularly Staghorn coral.. and sometimes Pillar coral, and it really sucks when that filmy type of algae gets stuck on the coral.. hmmm. I wonder how that happens. But, I digress. My point is that I’m sure you’ll find someone else.

GUS: Yeah… You’ll find someone. Algae on coral? Ain’t no algae on coral.

SHAWN: I’ve seen it. At least half a dozen times.

GUS: Where?

SHAWN: Snorkeling

GUS: Since when do you snorkel?

SHAWN: I snorkel… Why, you didn’t think I snorkeled? I’m a snorkeler. And I can communicate with fish too. Watch this (puts face near the fish tank and blows bubbles in the air) bubble bubble bubble… See. I told you. I am all about the sea.

JULES: Well, we’ll have to inspect the scene thoroughly and then round up some suspects. Hmm. It seems that this man is a Notary, yet his Notary seal seems to be missing. Perhaps this Notary was murdered to cover up a botched notarization.

LASSITER: Or perhaps the Notary had an exclusive contract with his boss, and his boss found out….

SHAWN: That the Notary was cheating on him… I think you’re projecting, Lassie. Your ex-girlfriend.

LASSITER: She never cheated on me! She was arrested for conspiracy.

SHAWN: Sure she didn’t. I understand. We need to know who the last one who was in the room was — and that man (or woman) will be… the killer.

GUS: What if there were two of them.

SHAWN: Okay… I’m getting something. (puts right fingers to side of head). I know who the killer is… or should I say… “Killizz”

LASSITER: According to this security footage, a well known gangster named Tommy Walker was the last man to come here.

SHAWN: Wait a second, I recognize those finger tattoos. Put them all together, one one hand is says love, and on the other hand’s fingers it says hate. And mom told me not to use four letter words. The killer had a document missing a page and the Notary refused to sign it. So, the killer murdered the Notary, stole the Notary’s stamp and backdated the notarization so that it would APPEAR to have been done long before the murder even though it would not be recorded until after because of some last minute travel arrangements gone bad.

JULES: How do you come up with this?

SHAWN: I have a natural gift.

(Meanwhile the main suspect Tommy Walker, a hardened criminal is at home eating fruit loops and watching the muffets when our dynamic team of sleuths barges in)

LASSITER: (pointing gun) You’re under arrest for the Murder of John Q Smith, Notary Public at large.

TOMMY: I didn’t kill him. He just died shortly after our Notary appointment.

SHAWN: Ah-ha, but your Notary appointment yielded no actual notarization. Or did it. Wait a second… I”m getting something (see’s notarized form in the bag) I see a … win a trip for two to Disney Land…

GUS: Shawn!

SHAWN: Oh, sorry, no… check right behind the Disneyland document and you will find the incriminating document. Yes… A falsified Power of Attorney with a classic missing page… The NNA warns people about that type of situation.

JULES: Oh my God Shawn. You’re right. This Notarization was dated several days ago, but the ink is still fresh.

SHAWN: Caught… in the act. And… we happen to have access to this Notary’s Notary journal which has no record of your transaction on May 5th, “el cinco de Mayo” of the Power of Attorney in question. Which proves that either the Notary kept lousy records, or that you faked the notarization. We’ll have to take the form to the lab so that Woody can inspect the ink for aging.

TOMMY: Okay, I did it. I stole the Notary’s seal, but I didn’t kill him. The killer

SHAWN: Or “Killizz”

TOMMY: is STILL at large. We’ll have to wait for the autopsy. In the mean time… hello travelocity.

JULES: Not so fast. We have the right to detain you until we resolve this.

GUS: Good thing this Notary kept good records because many Notaries on 123notary don’t think they need to keep a journal since their state doesn’t require it. And the ones in California who are required, don’t understand that each document and signature require their own journal entry. You can’t just put them all on the same line and expect that to be a legal record.

SHAWN: How do you know all this?

GUS: Because I used to be a commissioned Notary Public for the state of California, County of Santa Barbara — thank you very much for asking.

SHAWN: Oh cool, so can you notarize my stuffed penguin I’ve had since childhood?

GUS: You never had a stuffed penguin.

SHAWN : Did too, you just never saw it.

GUS: Where did you keep it?

LASSITER: Gentlemen, let’s be done with this inconsequential rambling and get to the task at hand. We need to take Tommy into custody and then question him. Meanwhile, we need to see Woody to see what the autopsy reveals.

WOODY: Hmmm, I’ve checked the body thoroughly and it seems that the Notary was administered a tiny amount of poison that would make him drowsy for just the amount of time it would take Tommy to borrow the Notary’s seal, stamp a document, return the seal and then leave. Tommy probably figured the Notary wouldn’t suspect a thing. HOWEVER, since the Notary had an allergy to some of the chemicals in the poison, the Notary died on the spot. Although the death was accidental, the poisoning was not.

LASSITER: Involuntary manslaughter. Tommy will get a much shorter sentence. A petty crime gone wrong.

SHAWN: Couldn’t the Notary die on an x, or on a dotted line instead of on the spot. Wouldn’t that be cooler.

GUS: Shawn! A notary can’t die on an x marks the spot. That’s ridiculous. He could die on a chair.

SHAWN: Or a gezebo. Or … wait a second, or a pagoda. But, that would probably only be a Japanese Notary.

GUS: Unless it was an American tourist Notary who was on vacation in a place where there are pagodas.

SHAWN: True, but would the American Notary carry their seal with them to Osaka to a pagoda and then just die there?

GUS: I don’t know. But, the Notary seal might drop out of his bag while he was bowing. When Americans bow, they bow too low. Japanese bow just a little bit — just the right amount.

SHAWN: How do you know so much about bowing?

GUS: I studied Hokkaido style karate — that is how I know. And if you studied that too, the knowledge would come from within you.

SHAWN: Right now the only thing coming from within me is an intense desire to eat a pineapple. Wanna share one?

GUS: Okay!

LASSITER: You guys are both insane. But, we cracked the case and we can all go home now, except for Tommy who’s going to do some real time.

SHAWN: Yes, unless he also finds a way to backdate his prison sentence!

.

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January 9, 2022

Which rules are laws, Lender practices, or best practices?

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Notary Rules or Industry Rules?

It is confusing with all the standards in the Notary business. When 123notary teaches Notary practices, we are not teaching laws, but solid practices. Many Notaries argue with us about our practices because they are not required by law. That is the whole point — we are not teaching law because we are not authorized to, and because we don’t know it. We do know solid notary practices, and teach it as you can get into trouble for not knowing your basics. However, notaries have many misconceptions about the rules of the industry. So, let me clarify.

1. You can always over sign — industry practice (not a law)
Is this a Notary law, industry practice, or what? This statement means that you can sign a document with a name that is longer than the name typed in the signature line. However, that does not make it legal to notarize that longer name unless you can prove the name with an ID. Pleasing the Lender is one aspect of being a Notary. Obeying the law is a much more important one. If you displease the Lender you get fired. If you get in trouble with the law you can end up in jail. Pick your poison.

2. The name on the ID has to match
Please keep in mind that there are four names we have to keep track of:
(a) The name on the ID
(b) The name typed on the signature section of the document.
(c) The name signed on the document
(d) The name on the acknowledgment.

In theory these names could all be different variations, but it is cleaner if they are identical. The critical points are that:

(e) The name on the Acknowledgment must be identical or matching but shorter than the name on the signature line of the document. If the signature on the document says John W Smith, you can put John Smith or John W Smith in the Acknowledgment to please the law, but the shorter name might not please the client.
(f) The name on the Acknowledgment must be provable based on the name on the ID, but does not have to be an exact match. The ID could say John W Smith and you can put John Smith in the Acknowledgment if you like.
(g) The name signed on the document can be identical or matching but longer than the name typed on the document to please most Lenders, but legally notarizing the longer signature or shorter signature is dependent on proving all of the components of their name with an ID.

3. The Lender is the boss of the Notary Public (true for signings, but not for the actual notary work)
The Lender is your boss as to the general assignment, and what happens with loan documents. They are NOT your boss about Notary issues and you should not ask them for Notary advice ever as they might have you do something illegal out of ignorance or greed. You ask your state’s notary division if you have a Notary question and perhaps the NNA hotline and that’s it. The Notary can ask the Lender their preference in how something is notarized if there is more than one legal way to do it, but you can not ask a Lender how to do your job. You are the appointed Notary, not them. If they want to do it their way, they should come over with their stamp and do it their way which hopefully is legal — but, it is their commission at stake if it is not legal. Don’t risk your commission depending on the Lender or Title for Notary advice.

4. The Notary is the boss of the Lender?
The Notary is a state appointed official who represents their state, although the state is not the entity that pays them. If there is a discussion between the Lender and the Notary as to how a Notary act is done, the Notary dictates how it should be done. If there are multiple legal ways to do something such as fixing a mistake by crossing out and initialing vs. attaching a loose certificate — then, the Notary can ask for the Lender’s preference, but not for advice. However, there are liability issues with doing cross outs and initialing. It looks like tampering and you don’t want to end up in court. So, once again, it is the Notary’s discretion as to how problems are solved when there are multiple methods to solve. You can ask the Lender what they like or you can dictate to the Lender what you are going to do. But, the Notary is the boss of Notary work. If they don’t like it, they can find another Notary. It is best if you explain the reasons why you want to do something a particular way. If your reason sounds prudent, there is a chance you might get some respect for your decision. Most Notaries don’t think issues out carefully and do not have well thought out reasons for anything they do. Read our course more and become reasonable! Your commission might depend on it.

5. Send me a loose certificate or jurat in the mail (illegal)
Acknowledgment or Jurat certificates must be stapled to the documents they are associated with. If there is one floating around, you cannot create another one until you destroy the original yourself. Some states do not allow creating new certificates for botched notarizations and require you to do the notarization all over again. Consult your notary handbook on this issue, especially in California where there are many new rules created in the last few years that I have heard about but not actually read to my satisfaction.

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January 8, 2022

Notary Suicide Hotline

Filed under: Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , , , — admin @ 5:04 am

This was originally published many years ago.

This blog entry seems appropriate now that the holidays have set in. I’m sure many of us have a solid dose of holiday related depression with less sunlight, and an interruption of our daily routines.

“Hurry — we have a level 3 on line 2!”, said the neurotic manager of this organization. What organization was this, you might ask? It is none other than the Notary Suicide Hotline. But, I have never heard of this, you might say! It all came to Jeremy in a dream…

The dream…
It was a few days ago. Jeremy had a dream that he and a few notaries were having sandwiches. The bread was a foot long, but each sandwich only had a small cutlet in it. Then Jeremy went up to the 7th floor of a haunted mansion to hide, because he felt bad that the notary industry was so slow, and felt afraid too! So, Jeremy went to his psychic to do dream interpretation. The sandwiches had lots of bread which represented hard work, but very little cutlet which represented nourishment. That meant that the notaries were working too hard for not enough money!

Another dream
Then, the next night Jeremy went to sleep there was another dream. In the dream, the NNA had become very concerned about the emotional well-being of notaries throughout the country. Many were depressed, and a few even contemplated ending it all. Something had to be done. So, the NNA created the Notary Suicide Hotline.

The call
Notary: “Hello… (sob) It’s too upsetting”
Frank: “I’m sorry about what you are going through. Would you like to talk about it?”
Notary: “Yes… well… It was another $40 signing… boo hoo hoo!”
Frank: “I’m so sorry to hear about that — please hold”

Frank “Hey Sully, we have a level 3 on line 2, can you handle it?”
Sully: “I got it!”
Frank: “Sorry to keep you waiting, I am going to transfer you to Sully — he specializes in exactly this type of crisis”
Notary: “Oh…okay”
Sully: “Hi, this is Sully, I heard that you were offered yet another $40 signing”
Notary: “Yes, it is terrible — we deserve more, especially with fax backs!”
Sully: “I’m so sorry about that. How many fax backs were there?”
Notary: “There were 12. I can’t figure out why they need so many!”
Sully: “Maybe they are insecure. Just remember — it’s THEM, not YOU”
Notary: “Really?”
Sully: “Yeah, they are the guys with the problem, not you!”
Notary: “Do you really mean that?”
Sully: “Sure, we get this all the time. they are paranoid that someone didn’t sign ONE little document on one out of a hundred loan documents. My attitude is — deal with it. Don’t put the notary through hell. If the notary makes a mistake, just don’t use them again unless they have a good track record.”
Notary: “That makes me feel so good. You are really on my side!”
Sully: “Hey… we have been dealing with this for a long time. It never ends. And for $40. It is ridiculous. They should pay at least $90 for those types of signings. But, don’t feel bad, just ride the wave until the economy picks up. They, maybe you’ll get lots of $125 signings, especially if you have experience.”
Notary: “I feel so hopeful now. I pictured everything being gloomy forever!”
Sully: “Nothing lasts forever. What goes down, must come up again, right?”
Notary: “That’s true. When the economy was good before, I thought it would last forever. Now that things are slow, I am depressed thinking that things will be slow forever. But, that isn’t true. Everything in the notary industry is cyclical!”
Sully: “You got it. So… you’re not thinking of ending it anymore, right?”
Notary: “No, you talked me out of it. How can I ever thank you?”
Sully: “Well, this week we are having a special, buy three NNA journals, get a half-price ticket to one of our seminars, what do you think?”
Notary: “Well, how much are three journals?”
Sully: “$40, but without the fax-backs!”
Notary: “It’s a deal!”

So, ends our level 3 suicide hotline call. Thank got it wasn’t a level 10. Level 9 is when a notary is standing at the edge of a bridge holding a stack of pre-fax-back loan documents. I’ll leave it to your imagination what a level 10 is. You need a lot more experience handling those types of calls.

Tweets:
(1) The Notary Suicide Hotline — making sure notary commissions expire before the notaries do since 1932.
(2) Notary Suicide Hotline: “I have a level 3 on line 2, can you handle it?”
(3) Notary Suicide Hotline: “May I help you?”
Notary: “I’m tired of $40 signings w/fax backs!”
(4) Don’t put the notary through hell. If the notary goofs, just don’t use them again.
(5) Dream: A long sandwich w/3 little cutlets inside.
Interpretation: Notaries doing too much work for too little money.

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January 1, 2022

Who is the authority at a Notary Loan Signing?

Originally published several years ago.

Notary Public Authority

We often ask questions about authority to signing agents, and the results are horrifying. Most Notaries do not know who is in charge of what. So, this article will sum it up clearly.

Notary Public
A Notary Public is a state appointed state official who is paid by customers, but whose “boss” or authority is the state Notary division. Many Notaries Public seem to be confused as to who their boss is, the one paying them or the one commissioning them. The problem is further complicated by the fact that the ones paying them often pay them for more than just Notary services as travel, pick up, drop off, and supervision of non-notarized signatures and packages seem to be part of the deal if you are a Signing Agent.

The Notary is the sole authority regarding what goes in a Notary certificate such as an Acknowledgment, Jurat, etc., what goes in the journal, what is allowed or not allowed, and how a notarization should be done.

It is common that Notaries have questions during a loan signing and direct those questions to the Lender or Title representative. This is okay for Title or Lending questions, but not for Notary questions where the Notary may only turn for help to their state Notary division, official Notary handbook, or perhaps the NNA hotline.

Notaries should NOT ask the Lender for Notary advice because:
1. The Lender is probably not a Notary
2. If the Lender is a Notary they might be in a different state
3. If the Lender is a Notary and in the same state they might not be knowledgeable.
4. If the Lender is a Notary, in the same state, and knowledgeable, they might (are likely to) give you advice that would make the job go more smoothly for them, yet have tremendous liability for you.
5. You are the one appointed to the job, so even if the person you are asking for advice is a Notary, they are not the one whose commission number gets put on the certificate, and you are the one going to jail if something goes wrong. Therefor, you have to know your laws and what you can and cannot do, etc.

Who can initial and where?
Any initials on a Notary certificate are done exclusively by the Notary Public. It looks like tampering if the borrower or anyone else makes marks on a Notary certificate. The borrower may initial documents, but not the Notary certificate or Notary section in or attached to a notarized document

The Lender
The Lender is the “boss” of what happens with loan documents. If the Lender authorizes a change, initialing, cross outs, etc., on an actual loan document that is NOT in the notary section, that is up to them and they are the authority on that matter, not the Notary. The minute the issue becomes with a Notary certificate, then the authority swings over to the Notary (even if the Notary doesn’t have a clue what to do.)

The Title Officer
The appointed Title company might be a good source of information about how to handle any issues that might come up with Title documents or recorded documents. You can ask them if you have questions, but don’t let them answer Notary questions.

Issues of Preference can be asked to the Lender
Sometimes there is more than one legal way to handle a situation. If there is an error on a preprinted Acknowledgment, and your state allows a choice of crossing out & initialing vs. using a fresh Acknowledgment form, you have a choice. The Notary has the right to make that choice on his/her own and choose the option that he/she feels is more prudent or ask the Lender. However, this is a situation where the Notary can ask the Lender not for advice, but for preference. If the Lender would prefer a loose Acknowledgment stapled on to the document rather than crossing out & initialing the original form, the Notary can proceed accordingly.

The Borrower
The borrower has the right to sign, not sign, tell you where to park and more. Their preferences matter as well.

Your State
Your state Notary division decides what the laws are in your state, how they are explained or document in your official Notary handbook, etc. They are your boss, so you do whatever they say. Additionally, if you are weak on your Notary knowledge, that can lead to ending up in court as a witness, having your commission revoked, suspended or terminated. Additionally, it is possible to be convicted of a crime if you are thought to be involved in property related fraud, or if you filled out a form stating that an Oath was taken when in fact it was never taken which is a daily fraud that most Notaries engage in that is unacceptable.
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December 28, 2021

Special memories of my life

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:41 am

Sometimes we get caught up in work and forget to smell the roses. But, I take time off and smell plenty of cactuses and pine trees and ocean breezes depending on where I go. Refreshing the soul and body is so important. But, what are the most memorable moments in my life.

1. My moments talking to my psychic Walter about dreams, managing my business, and spiritual topics mean a lot. I will think about this on my deathbed — assuming that I ever die.

2. Driving through Hungary in 2006 was a bit disorienting, but the scenery kept changing and I felt like I passed through eight national zones while in Hungary. It went from a Gypsy area that felt like Latin America (and the people looked Mexican too), to an area with Central Asian looking architecture to a communist looking area with Russian style buildings. Then it looked more Hungarian, and then I felt like I was in Thailand due to the triangular window casings. Finally, my last stop was near Austria and it looked German. What a bizarre day driving through Hungary. They kept speaking German to me. I guess they thought I was German. How odd.

3. Seeing my spiritual master in San Jose in 1998 was an experience like no other. I stood in line to meet him with twenty others. He patted me on the shoulder as a sort of spiritual blessing. But, I felt high as a kite for half an hour after that. I had some bizarre meditations that night where I felt an out of body experience as well. He was a very powerful guru.

4. Visiting Sedona, AZ in 2001 for the first time was like being in a movie. I kept saying — “I can’t believe we’re here” over and over and over. I was expecting to see the Marlboro man come out from behind a corner at any minute. The red rock scenery was fantastic and so was the buffalo burger and the hiking. Later in that trip we saw Dead Horse Canyon in Utah and we (my housemate and I) were cracking jokes and doing impressions of all the people who might make commentary on this scenic spot mimicking different accents, etc.

5. The other night I had a wonderful dream about my dream girl who I have never met. I was sitting in the back seat of a car, and she sat right down right in my lap. When will I meet this person? I felt so happy having this dream. I have had several dreams about this mystery lady — all in scenic places.

6. Seeing Mrs. Meao on the heater was truly special. She spent a lot of time in my room helping me do my work. I call it emotional support. I would always ask how she was feeling and she would normally stare into space, but sometimes she would tell me in cat language. She died in 2008 but comes several times a month in dreams. When she was dying I made her promise to come to me in dreams regularly, and she has. She keeps reincarnating into different cat bodies, and then dying within several years. I think she has had about five lives since she was our cat where she lived 14 human years — not sure how many cat years that is.

7. After Carmen died, I contacted her spirit a few times. It is hard for me to talk to spirits, but Carmen is up in heaven and is her usual self. Same personality — just without the body. She warned me that we are going to have a huge war involving Iran. I guess that is what they talk about up in heaven. I know it is coming because the Christians and Jews are both predicting this to happen soon. I just hope American doesn’t shut down because of this war. We’ll see.

8. When I was 16 I had my own landscaping business. Nothing fancy. But, I had to drag my lawnmowers all over the neighborhood and sometimes to other neighborhoods which was very time consuming. I pushed it all the way up steep hills. I was very motivated in those days. I saved my money and borrowed $4800 from my date and bought a Toyota pick up truck for $6219. I think that was the exact price. I got a quarter of a million miles out of that truck and did well with my lawn mowing business. I used that truck to give lots of friends rides as well and they were very appreciative. Without that truck it would have been almost impossible to have a social life in subsequent years. The people I knew and women I dated would not have been able to spend time with me had I not had a truck. Thank God for my work ethic.

9. When I was 17, I played a final recital on the cello at the Longy School of Music where I studied music on Saturdays. I practiced a lot. I don’t remember how I did. I played a Bach Suite, a concerto with chamber orchestra and a sonata with piano. It is all a fuzzy memory, but it was a big achievement in my life.

10. I played in two orchestras with my father. These were only ones that met a few times. But, I remember playing the Messiah. We also played the cello part for a Bach harpsichord concerto. My father and I both played the cello. He was better than I was, but I was good enough to play in seven orchestras.

11. In my distant and more early childhood, I remember Quaker Meeting. But, Quakers sit still — they don’t quake at all — maybe they need a new name. It was a nice 1700’s style building in a quaint and comfortable part of Cambridge, MA. I liked going there. I don’t remember what we learned in Sunday school other than that war was bad — but that the Army provided good work opportunities to people. So, which one is it? Is war good or bad? If you join the Army for work, you aren’t going to make paper mache, you are going to go to war dummy! We had Christmas pageants where I sang and played cello. I always remember this song — If you have a penny and you give it away, you’ll end up having more. I really don’t remember many specifics, but it was a nice place to be and our family life was a lot less turbulent when we made a weekly presence at this spiritual venue.

12. Elementary school is a very distant memory. My favorite class was gym with Mr. Arch. They really made it interesting and I did well (even though I was timid) until about age 12. I remember Clyde the bus driver. He was a guy in his early 60’s. I remember Sandy, Scott, Michael & Jay, and others. Michael invited me to their summer home on the beach and I got sucked under water by the undertow. That was scary. But it is a memory — and that is what I am writing about.

13. I think when I was seven, my father took me hiking to Mount Monadnock in New Hampshire. We have many photos of that trip. It is a large mountain with a very rocky top and several routes to the top starting from different sides of the mountain. We would always get Birch Beer on the way there. I don’t think I’ve had it since.

14. We had many Thanksgiving meals with friends and neighbors. One year we invited two guys from MIT who were very cerebral and had nowhere else to go. They liked to play music, so they played sonatas with my mom who was a professional pianist. Another year we met some distant relatives from Jordan — Walid, Nabeel, Faeeda, and Mary. They were very lively, had amazing stories, and were a lot of fun. Sometimes I wonder how they are doing.

15. When I was really little, my mom would drive me to Nanna and Pa’s house in Watertown, MA. They would babysit me and we would watch TV. I don’t remember much. I think I was afraid of the ebony door to the upstairs neighbor’s apartment. It was very ominous looking.

16. Starting 123notary was a memory. I was living like a pauper in Monterey Park, CA. I was working at signings and building my site up. What a lot of hard work, but it paid off and it was my passion! When they say stick to what you love, believe that. Because if you don’t love what you do, you won’t give it your 110% and stick to it year after year. I have many memories of building 123notary — too many to count — some of them traumatizing, some were glorious achievements.

17. More recently…

I meditated in the middle of nowhere in New Mexico and saw red lights in my meditation. It was very deep and meaningful. Then I went to a forest near Santa Fe, NM and saw greenish blue light which was coming from Lord Ganesh. I had never had this experience before. My guru said the red light was coming from a portal to other planets. Wow! It was an extraterrestrial contact, but on a spiritual level — so I didn’t get to meet ET. Maybe next time. On one occasion on the border of AZ and NM in Navajo, NM I felt the vibe of a forcefield that was created by extraterrestrials, but I didn’t see anything. One week before this experience, I had a dream that I saw a UFO hovering behind some tall buildings in Los Angeles. I guess the dream manifested itself, but not in a way that was as much fun as I was expecting.

On a brighter note — I have met many mystical people in New Mexico, especially when I go to native areas. They are such peaceful people. Several people I saw at gas stations who I didn’t even have the pleasure of talking to left a lasting impression on me. I guess they must have been deeply spiritual beings, whomever they were.

18. I’m trying to think of noteworthy things that happened here around Los Angeles, but nothing comes to mind. It is just business as usual and not much good or bad happens around here other than the shut down. Eating on the trunk of my car with my housemate at one of my favorite South Indian restaurants was a shutdown memory. It was like a shutdown style date. Thanking God for lamb chops was another memory during the shutdown. At least I could still eat well even though I was miserable. Going to comedy clubs once in a while and to Moroccan group dinners definitely is memorable, but we do this so infrequently. I think I should have fun more.

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