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July 29, 2016

Notary Oscars

Filed under: Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , , , — admin @ 10:30 pm

Notary Oscars

Welcome to this year’s Notary Oscars. For best picture…

“Trumbo” – About the black list – where notaries get blacklisted after doing something wrong… like making a profit which the signing companies don’t want them to do, putting them in the black. Not to be confused with the actors at this year’s Oscars – the white list.

“The Big Short” – about getting shorted out of your pay.

“Bridge of Spies” – about signing companies who spy on notaries who say bad things about them on forums.

“Spotlight” – Uncovering the discovery about having non-consensual notarizations with underage signers.

“The Hateful Eight” – About the current Supreme Court complaining about the Notary who doesn’t know how to give an oath to the yet to be appointed new guy.

“Steve Jobs” – About Apple’s refusal to let the government crack the cell phone information of the notary who was about to notarize a terrorist.

“Joy” – About what a notary feels when actually getting paid on time.

“Room” – About what you don’t have if your last name is too long to fit on the signature page.

“The Danish Girl” – About the first male notary who became a female notary, formerly “Robin Schneider” on his commission stamp, now changed to “Robin Schneider”.

“Inside Out” – About a notary who knows his notary law inside out, and to stay consistent, notarizes a document that’s inside out while wearing his shirt inside out.

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Wheel of Fortune — Notary Edition
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15314

Notaries Without Makeup
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15405

A Notary Public Cures Lying
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6872

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March 2, 2016

Commission Impossible…

COMMISSION IMPOSSIBLE

Your commission, should you choose to accept it, is for an impossible mission that few notaries’ businesses live to tell about… The ones not worth commissioning…

Look out! The signer isn’t present! Right behind you! That document is incomplete! Not a good sign – The signer is the notary’s spouse! Watch out! The signer can’t produce acceptable identification! If their driver’s license picture is Waldo of “Where’s Waldo” fame, beware! Whether you can spot him in a crowd, or not, Waldo doesn’t really exist! Danger! The notary has a financial interest in the transaction! In that case, your interest must be in finding a commission impossible!

Oh no! The document doesn’t have a prepared notary certificate! Prepare yourself for disaster or no commission, whichever comes first! Danger! The notary thinks the signer is being coerced to sign! Coerce yourself out of that situation! What’s that, you say? The notary suspects the transaction is fake or deceptive? That’s as conducive to landing a commission as landing a punch in a fake wrestling match!

Look out!! The signer can’t pay the notary’s fee? Commission impossible! The signer’s a minor? Commission impossible! The signer seems drunk? Face this sober fact – Commission impossible!!

Don’t let the signer intimidate you into notarizing when the law prohibits it! If you use good judgment, you’ll get the commission the right way. Oh, and since this is “Commission Impossible,” at the end you’ll also get the girl, even if you’re not Tom Cruise. If you’re a female notary, you’ll get the guy. Even if he’s not Tom Cruise!

You might also like:

Deceptive fax backs: the good old bait and switch tactic
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14040

Deceptive identities — companies that change their names
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=1090

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August 12, 2012

The Mannequin Signer

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The mannequin signer

AKA — Notarizing a weirdo!

The notary went to the signing, and the signer came to the door. The notary had this bad feeling — something just wan’t right. When she walked in, she saw a site she had never seen before. There was a man who was just — so — strange. And the guy had a female mannequin in his living room. He said he had it there because he felt alone.

Interruption — comment from the editor — “Get a cat buddy!!!”

The signer said he wanted the notary to stay longer after notarizing because he enjoyed the notary’s company. The notary was very uncomfortable with this situation. The signer had a dark and dirty energy about him. It was really a weird situation.

The signing went fine, but the signer just didn’t want to let the female notary go!

Moral of the story — never do a signing with a single person at their home — especially if the signer is a man and you are a woman. Find a nearby Starbucks — because — you never know!!! You might bump into the mannequin signer!

Tweets:
(1) The signer had a dark & dirty energy about him.
(2) Moral of the story – never do a signing w/a single person at their home, especially if they’re male & ur female.
(3) The notary had this bad feeling that something just wasn’t right.
(4) The guy had a female mannequin in his living room. He said he had it there because he felt alone.

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