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November 14, 2021

The atmosphere of evil

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:41 am

During the shutdowns, or more specifically from late 2019 until about early April 2021 there was an ominous and evil vibration in the atmosphere. I realize this is part of the Armageddon process and needs to happen. It is part of a global spiritual cleaning. But, the spiritual vibration in the air was really oppressive and got to me no matter how positive I tried to stay. I had many nightmares with vivid symbology about this Godless energy that seems to fuel communist thinking.

The worst dream was of a high rise where I was in the basement, and the walls were all concrete with high ceilings. It was very dreary and spartan. I went in the elevator and of the 12 floors we normally have in my building there were only two floors with buttons (the other floors were shut down), and those two floors were controlled by the government. This was a nightmare about society turning communist and evil. Fortunately, we got through this period only losing some of our local businesses. Most are still open and although business is slower than normal, they are surviving.

I feel that there was an evil consciousness, and it influenced the majority of Americans and people overseas to be fearful, evil and insane. I saw so many paranoid people clutching onto their facemasks with the thought that a tiny piece of cloth was the only thing that could save them from their worst nightmare — Covid!!!! So many atheist governors stripped their citizens of constitutional freedoms, all in the name of this stupid disease that God invented to torture the wicked. People who were normally okay became mean and pestilent. Covid brought out the worst in us — but I don’t believe it was the disease that did this — it was the evil consciousness. Whether or not this was the “antichrist” I am not sure, but it seemed to have a good control over non-believers or religious people who had no faith but valued belonging to a community of like minded pretenders.

I learned from my psychic and a Rabbi what was going on. Those people who are not honest live in a state of Sheker. It means lie or falsehood. But, people who are not honest with themselves, or perhaps not decent, live in a spiritual state where they will believe other people’s lives.

Sweden did not practice the use of face masks and their death rate per million was half of that of NY and similar to CA. However, people still believe this nonsense that facemasks save lives. This is a lie that people believe even though readily available numbers on worldometer show truth. When truth is staring us in the face, the majority prefers to live in delusion. It is mass insanity.

Why do so many people choose to live in terror and insanity? It is because they don’t believe in God or nature. Nature provided us with a good immune system. Nurturing your immune system with healthy foods, sunshine and social interaction makes it much more healthy which keeps you safe. Making yourself miserable locking yourself in your basement and wearing a facemask makes you depressed which lowers your immune system by 80% making you MORE susceptible to death from infectious diseases. Most people choose the option that superficially looks like it is keeping them “safe” while it actually is deadly. Being around these insane lunatics that think like this is very disturbing and also dangerous.

As the spiritual environment shifted in April 2021, politicians in many parts of the states started loosening restrictions and acting more reasonable. Even Biden got more reasonable about the whole border issue.

I used to think it was annoying that so many people are atheists, or lack true belief while claiming to be a God follower. After seeing how dangerous atheists can be to the rest of us — I see them as a threat to mankind.

Atheists not only are a bad influence on the rest of us — they shut down businesses, schools, and churches for very long periods of time. It has been more than a year since California students could go to school. Children don’t die of Covid in any significant way. How long will this insanity last and why do the parents tolerate this without daily protests across the state? The only conclusion that I can draw is that the lack of faith in God is dangerous and deadly. The fact that I am surrounded by faithless immoral people puts my life in tremendous peril. Yes, God protects me but I am not immune to group punishments and there is a limit to what he can do for me.

If religious people had fought to keep churches open, all of the prayer could have been a weapon against the evil forces in the atmosphere. But, these forces of the devil were what led to churches being closed down. But, the Christians and Jews did not stand up for God — they sat passively and took this oppression because they are not fervent believers. I get the feeling that nobody stands for anything these days except for wokism which is based on stupidity and self-deception.

I am happy that the 16 or so months of spiritual darkness is over and that the ominous vibration has lifted. However, I am reminded that Armageddon has started and the war will probably get out of control soon. I hope we survive relatively unscathed by this. Israel is having tremendous turmoil with the Jerusalem and Gaza crisis. How long before Iran and Russia get seriously involved and WW3 begins? Even if America survives, with the rest of the world probably blown to shreds, what will life be like.

On a brighter note, the Messiah has been born (I think), and will reveal himself in 2034 according to my guru. So if you can survive until then, the spiritual environment will be like heaven. The sky will be a richer shade of blue, the flowers a little more colorful, people a little more happy, etc.

The moral of this rambling essay is:
If you like spiritual light, pray more — it makes a huge difference not only for you but for the entire atmosphere. When God thinks you value him, miracles can happen.

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October 24, 2021

The Notary and the N95: Putting Covid info in your notes section

Filed under: Your Notes Section — admin @ 8:02 am

Notaries often like to indicate that they are vaccinated in their notes section. Others note that they take all of the Covid precautions. It is good to put this in your notes section. This matters to some people and could be a hiring decision. Being conscientious is generally a good thing unless you are conscientious in a way that backfires which can happen if you don’t think things through.

People got vaccinated because it was the only way they could feel “safe.”
Then they realized that they still didn’t feel “safe” because other people weren’t vaccinated.
Later they decided that the only way they could feel safe is it everyone else got vaccinated.
After that they found out that vaccines have a shelf life and are only good for preventing Covid for a number of months. Then they realized they had to take a booster, and then find a way to coerce the rest of the world to do the same.
In 2022, the Alpha variant will come out and then there will be yet another booster.

By 2023, we will each have to take about 20 different shots per year, each infused with 100x your daily recommended allowance of aluminum, lead and mercury (not one of my jokes, read the ingredients and see for yourself.) There will be compounds that genetically modify how your body works for better or for worse.

Don’t forget that the genetic engineer who designed humans in such a way that we have survived 180,000 years is named God. Whatever he did seems to have worked. If you let a few mad scientists tinker with your genetics to make it how they think would be good without any long term knowledge, you are likely be the next Frankenstein.

Then in 2024, the Alpha-Omega-Phi variant will come out — a variant that makes people want to do hazing on a daily basis.

In 2025, the Beta3 variant will come out that will only attack children and kill them, that is assuming people are not sterilized by the original vaccine — and that remains to be seen. Bad news for teachers if I am right — the teachers union will be out of business if everybody is sterile.

NEWSFLASH
You don’t need a single one of these vaccines or facemasks. 5000 I.U. of vitamin D3 per day (ask your doctor first) will raise your D levels in your blood or liver, or wherever they are. Lots of veggies, fermented foods, and shitake or maitake mushrooms will keep your immunity bullet proof. Socializing and being happy helps immunity too. It is your immune system that will save you from Covid, not some BS mask or vaccine. If facemasks were so critical, God would have had you born with one attached to your body. God is not an idiot, he designed the entire cosmos piece by piece. Let’s see Fauci do that!

Facemasks delay the spread of Covid, they don’t end it. That just means you will catch Covid and die in March instead of February. What is the long term difference? Vitamin D has been proven to keep you out of the hospital and prevent death by a factor of 96% if you have high D levels vs. low. Vaccines and facemasks combined do not reduce your risk of covid death by 96%

So, why does the media not tell you this?
Because they are owned or controlled by companies who profit from selling facemasks and vaccines.

It is remarkable that more than half of Americans put their trust in complete criminals. The stupidity astounds me. And no matter how many percent of the community has one of those worthless degrees from some university, they still cannot think critically. So, what good is it. I’m siding with the Amish. They end school at 14, but they know how to think normally. Plus I just love those horses and buggies!

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October 17, 2021

My response to NNA’s article: Is the Notary industry overcrowded?

Filed under: Marketing Articles — admin @ 7:39 am

My opinion on this matter is that there is a lot more notary work than there used to be. The crazy ups and downs in the economy, people losing their jobs due to covid related causes and getting new jobs. People escaping from certain areas and moving to other areas. All of this transitioning necessitates a lot more Notary work and Notaries. And yes, there are more Notaries out there than before. When people lose their job, the first thing that goes through their head is whether or not to become a Notary — or so it seems.

However, for the last eight or so years, new notaries and old alike lack the willingness to master their trade and become experts. Many take classes and pass tests. But, when I test them on actual notary or situational knowledge, few can get more than 80%.

So having lots of poor quality notaries who can’t even administer an Oath properly is not overcrowded. The quantity of what I consider to be qualified Notaries is as sparse as the population in Northern Alaska in between sled dog races. Actually, I think those races are in central Alaska along the biggest river when it freezes over. And the Northern lights are good in both places. But, I digress. What was I writing about again? Ah yes — Notaries.

POINTS IN THE NNA ARTICLE DISCUSSED

The author of the NNA article says that many Notaries claim that there is not enough work to go around. Qualified Notaries are not making this claim. They claim that there is not enough work that pays what they want to go around. Notaries with no name recognition, no skills to speak of and no experience would not get much work even if there were enough work to go around. I understand the author’s point, but when you look at the situation a little below the surface it looks very different.

The author states that RON or Remote Online Notary work creates new opportunities. This is a very true point. However, RON work is feast or famine. The 80:20 rule of Real Estate where 20% of the agents get 80% of the work applies to RON, if you change it to the 99:1 rule. It seems that the applications and sites catering to RON work favor the very solid Notaries who have seniority and know what they are doing. A handful of Notaries are cleaning up where the majority are lucky to get even one job. So, understanding RON from a business perspective is complicated and it does not provide work for the masses.

The author recommends: use the support of your fellow Notaries. Yes, this is a great idea. However, any successful notary who teams up with others will be very picky who they choose or their reputation will go down the drain. If a new Notary thinks they can partner up with an experienced Notary with a good customer base, this is very unlikely unless you developed a stellar reputation or are very socially close to the experienced Notary. But, in the long run, networking is a good idea. I did it for years, and many Notaries on 123notary do it too. Networking — it’s a good idea, but there are catches and many considerations.

The author recommends: Network with local businesses that need notary services. Once again, another good idea. But, this is an idea you should be using anyway regardless of how the notary market is doing. Call up local businesses. Or drop by and give them your card. A certain percentage will use you, so go to lots, and have lots of cards.

Then the author recommends: Find opportunities outside of your local area. This is what I recommend too. It is called widening your net. You should do that in any case whether business is fast or slow if the price is right or if it is for a client you like enough to drive. This point is a good one, but has nothing to do with overcrowding.

SUMMARY
I feel this particular NNA article is helpful, but is a general marketing article with a title that is specific to a particular type of market condition that the article does not address. The fact is that for years, the NNA has been outstanding at marketing to new Notaries, getting them on board and turning them into signing agents. Many of these Notaries are Realtors, Insurance workers, Mortgage and Escrow people, etc. NNA tends to attract a good crowd and a big crowd and floods the industry with signing agents. However, how many of these signing agents can pass a tough notary or signing agent exam? The answer is very few. And the reason is that people since about 2013 (yes I noticed this), have become lazy and don’t want to study hard. Even people with four different certifications don’t like to study hard. This is hard to believe but it is my experience.

Here is the original article
https://www.nationalnotary.org/notary-bulletin/blog/2021/09/is-the-notary-industry-overcrowded

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July 28, 2021

A Rabbi explains Notary Oaths & Affirmations

Filed under: General Stories — Tags: , , , — admin @ 5:24 am

Oaths and Affirmations have many religious overtones. The fact that God is mentioned in one and not the other is one aspect. The other gets into rules that resemble some of the rules for getting in an elevator during a kosher shabbat. Remember — some elevators are more kosher than others.

SUSIE: Rabbi, I heard that you can discuss how to do kosher notarizations. Can you elaborate in the case of Oaths?

RABBI NOTARIVICH: Yes. You see, (pauses, while pulling gently on his long and flowing beard) there are two types of solemn statements that could be made under the penalty of perjury to a Notary Public. One is an Oath, and the other is an Affirmation. The affirmation cannot be kosher because it doesn’t mention God. But, on the other hand the Oath is also perhaps not kosher because it makes you swear under Oath to God as a special act. This insinuates that under normal situations you would not necessarily tell the truth, but because you are engaged in a solemn ceremony with the Notary Public under the penalty of perjury that you will tell the truth. So, therefore neither solemn statement is kosher from that point of view.

On the other hand, for legal purposes we need such acts, otherwise, supposedly nothing could get done in the business world. And since we need to have sworn statements, it would be good if we did so under God, not solely for the purpose of swearing under God, but because those who engage in Affirmations seem to ignore God, disacknowledge God, dislike God, or dislike those who believe in him. So, Oaths would be more kosher than Affirmations relatively speaking although there is no formal standard, and technically a Notary act can neither be kosher, nor non-kosher.

However, on the third hand…

SUSIE: Rabbi, do you have three hands?

RABBI: Figuratively, I have infinite hands, it is a manner of speech. Anyway… So, on the third hand, there is another legal aspect which parallels with some of the ideology behind kosher elevators.

SUSIE: Does that mean you have to do a blessing on the elevator, or do a blessing while you are in the elevator, or the elevator needs to be milchik?

RABBI: If you ate meat, you definitely shouldn’t cook in a milchik elevator, but not so many people cook in an elevator unless they are really behind schedule. But, when a Notary is confronted with a client, the Notary may not choose the Notary act. They can explain the Notary acts and compare and contrast them but not choose them. The notary can ask if the client wants an Oath or Affirmation. Now, the case may arise where the Affiant is not the client. One party is paying for the notarization while another is being Notarized. This is common. So, which one chooses the Notary act. The answer is the one paying even if he chooses the wrong act for the situation. The document custodian if there is one might be wise to voice a preference as to what type of Notary act they will accept, as they can ultimately reject the notarization.

SUSIE: So, this is complicated, you have an affiant, a client, a custodian, a notary, AND a rabbi? What would happen if all of these entities went into a bar together? Or had to screw in a light bulb? What would happen?

RABBI: Easy. If the Rabbi was asked how to screw in the light bulb, he would want to spend at least 100 hours referencing sources in the scriptures and the midrashim to find suitable precedents for how to handle the situation. However, he would get nowhere because he wouldn’t be able to see without a functional lightbulb, so he would sit there in frustration and ultimately shrug his shoulders, say, “Oy gevalt”, and then leave. The document custodian would not be there so he could do nothing. The affiant would be a guest and would therefore do nothing. The client would be remote as well and would do nothing. The Notary would leave. However, the building custodian — a sixth entity would probably be the one to change the lightbulb, or the building manager, or whomever owns or manages the property.

SUSIE: That was complicated but makes sense. What if they went into a bar?

RABBI: The Rabbi would order a Manhattan, but would spent 20 minutes bothering the bartender as to whether or not the glass it was to be served in had even touched anything with dairy over the life of its existence and the bar tender would get annoyed and help someone else. The Notary would order a Santa Barbara Cabernet Sauvignon called, “Notary Public Red Blend”… yes, it actually exists, or something with the name Notary Public because the vineyard was owned by someone who used to be a Notary. The client would order a beer, and the affiant, would not want to swear under the influence so he would say, “I will have Ginger Ale”.

SUSIE: An interesting take on an old joke.

RABBI: So anyway, the client or the affiant if he is also the client chooses the type of notarization. We can compare choosing the notarization to pressing a button on an elevator or online menu. After all, with online notarizations, you would have to click a button to choose your notary act. On Shabbat which is from Friday sundown to Saturday sundown a person who is shomer shabbat (who follows the rules of kosher) cannot press an elevator button or turn on a light unless it is an emergency. However, a kosher elevator, stops on every floor, so you don’t have to press a button to call it nor do you have to press a button to choose what floor.

SUSIE: I feel sorry for kosher people who used to go to the world trade center, that used to have 200 floors. That would take four hours to get to the top if it stopped at every floor and by then shabbat would be half over.

RABBI: A good point.

ANSWERING QUICK QUESTIONS BY PHONE ON THE SABBATH

LAURA: Rabbi, I called a Notary on Shabbat to ask if she did Debt Consolidations. She responded that she could not answer business questions on Shabbat because that would be working. So, I asked, why did you answer the phone then?

RABBI: On the one hand.

SUSIE: Here we go with the hands again. I’m expecting at least four hands.

RABBI: One the one hand, and just for the sake of argument, let’s say it is the left hand, it is forbidden to work on the sabbath which is shabbat in Hebrew. The Torah also forbids walking more than 2000 cubits out of your respective town on shabbat, perhaps because that would also be laborious even though that is not work. 2000 cubits is roughly 1KM just for the sake of reference. And it might take 15 minutes to walk that far.

So, this kosher Notary is willing to burden herself with a phone call on shabbat not knowing if it is a personal call or a business call. Since the Torah prohibits, working, but also prohibits recreational activities such as unnecessary or excessive walking that could prove laborious after a few minutes…. hmmm… there is no formal point of view on this matter.

It seems that since the notary took the trouble to answer the call which she knew had nothing to do with shabbat, that she could also answer a quick question about business just as long as answering that question was not excessively laborious like walking a kilometer. After all, at Synagogue, people discuss what business they are in and what is going on at their companies. That is talking about work, but it is very different than actually working. The point of not being laborious in any way on Shabbat is to save your energy and focus for prayer, relaxing, and socializing. If you waste your time on endless phone calls you lose that focus. It would be better that she would not answer the phone unless it was family or related to shabbat. But, answering a quick question would be okay in my book. I’m sure others will disagree as this is a controversial topic.

It would probably be better not to answer any phone calls on shabbat unless it is an emergency or related to who is coming to dinner.

NOTARY REVIEWS: SLANDER & GOSSIP ACCORDING TO THE SCRIPTURES

VICKI: Rabbi, if a Notary did a bad job, would it be considered unkosher gossip or “Leshon Hara” to write a bad review on his listing?

RABBI: Many will agree that committing leshon hara could be worse than murder. But, on the other hand, if you don’t say anything, that notary might harm others endlessly. If you write a bad review, you might be harming that Notary’s reputation which could cause terrible spiritual consequences in this life and the next. On the other hand, if you don’t write the review, that Notary might harm others. So, should you choose the lesser of the evils? Should you only write the review if that Notary did something very bad and showed no sign of remorse? It is hard to answer a question like this as it is a judgement call.

THE NOTARY AND THE BACON BURGER

SAM: I just did a meditation where I visited Notary Hell. There was a guy there who wrote a bad review about someone who ruined a hospital notarization. The only crime the inmate at hell had done in his life was to write a bad review. The Notary’s reputation was permanently ruined as his prime clients saw the review, and the Notary later starved to death as a result. And it was all because of that guy who wrote the bad review.

RABBI: Did he mention anything about how the social life is in hell? Word on the street is, “Go to hell for the social life, but heaven for the weather.”

SAM: Next time I’ll have to ask. I’m going to the underworld tonight, but I’m sure I’ll have time to visit hell sometime on Wednesday. Oh wait. I have an Apostille signing on Wednesday, maybe Wednesday night.

RABBI: One of my friends accidentally ate a piece of bacon and he was sure he would end up in hell. Could you… umm… you know, check up on him and see if he actually made it to hell?

SAM: Was his name Saul? And did he always wear red suspenders?

RABBI: Yes.

SAM: Never heard of him.. Just kidding. Saul is in purgatory. His Teshuva (repentance) is to think less about nonsensical trivialities. Until he masters this, the angels won’t let him into heaven.

RABBI: The irony of it all. Well I guess that wraps it up. We have answered all of our rabbinical Notary questions. Tune in next week to Ask the Rabbi!

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July 18, 2021

More on a bar only for “cool” notaries!!!

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 4:09 am

My short blog about a bar only for cool Notaries took off. The comments were great, and people really liked it. It really needed to be longer, but I didn’t realize it would be so popular. I’m just wondering what would people talk about at a Notary bar?

NOTARY: I’ll have a Manhattan… put “New York” County in the venue though. Manhattan is not a legal name for a county.

JEREMY: Just for my records, do you do other counties too?

NOTARY: Call me back during business hours. Can’t you see I’m having a drink, or trying to?

BARTENDER: Can I see some ID?

NOTARY: I ID you, you don’t ID me…. I’m the Notary. Besides, look at this gray hair and arthritis… Okay, he’s giving me the look. Here is my ID.

JEFF: Hey baby, is that a stamp in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

MAY: I’m supposed to say that dummy. You’re so dumb I bet you work exclusively for signing companies who low-ball you.

JEFF: Hey hey hey, that was a low blow. We all have needs. Would you like to sign my journal where all the other hot ladies have?

MAY: I thought I was the only one! Hey, I ordered a Reverse Mortgage on the rocks, and I need it yesterday — so backdate it!

BOUNCER: Sorry, maam, but I need to hook you up to the coolometer to see if you are cool enough to hang out here.

MAY: I’m too intoxicated to drive, so I’m in big trouble if I don’t pass.

JEFF: Better hook me up to the laughometer, this chick is funny!

JEREMY: Hey bartender, if Jim Beam wants to be notarized as Jim W Beam, but his ID says Jim Beam, can you notarize him under the circumstances?

BARTENDER: If he’s over 21, I’ll notarize him. I had John Hancock come in here, and guess what he did.

JEREMY: I don’t know… did he sign something?

MAY: John Hancock ate something that didn’t agree with him, but said not to worry, because — he said — he had a good CONSTITUTION!

BOUNCER: I would like to declare my independence. All of you are cool tonight. I’ll see who is coming at the door.

BARTENDER: How come “Margarita” doesn’t have a last name? How do you notarize someone with just one name.

JEFF: Hmmm, I had a guy named Fink once in a bad neighborhood. Real story. That was his first and only name. No surname. Bizarre. Not a wealthy person just for the record.

JEREMY: I’ll have a Black Russian

MAY: Don’t you mean an “African American Russian?”

JEREMY: Comrade please, you think I’m trying to hear that? Oh hell Nyet…. helllll nyet!!!

JEFF: Okay, dos-vidanya… actually it is late so tres or cuatro-vidanya baby!

BARTENDER: How did Mary get bloody? Was it one of those dangerous notarizations?

MAY: Maybe it was that time of the month.

JEREMY: Yeah, the notary business really picks up at that time of the month.

JEFF: Not that time of the month. It’s a different — that time of the month.

JEREMY: Yes, but if you call notaries about their listing at that busy time of the month they get cranky.

MAY: Oh, so now we can get cranky at two times of the month. Being a woman just isn’t what it used to be.

BARTENDER: Since this is a Notary bar, did you know there is a wine called Notary Public from California’s mid coast region.

JEREMY: I knew that — I’ve had it many times. Great wine, a little pricy though.

MAY: I hope they didn’t charge more than the state maximum per signature.

JEREMY: They charged $20 per signature — I mean per glass. Ouch. But, when I had it, I started going into that zone — like a haze, like after you have some French wine, life is like a dream.

MAY: And you started dreaming about notarizing sexy girls on the banks of the Rhone?

JEREMY: Actually, after a glass of Bordeaux at a local spot I started fantasizing about being in the rolling hills of Bordeaux. That thought came to my head as I gazed into the distance in a relaxed state. Ah, the joys of wine. And it all happened at my favorite place in Los Angeles — Farmer’s market.

JEFF: Before I go, does the Farmer’s daughter hang out there?

JEREMY: Yes, but she is not old enough to get notarized…

BARTENDER: And not old enough to do a whole lot of other things too I bet.

MAY: You have to be 18 before your signature is legally binding, and 21 before your drink at a bar is legally binding. That’s one thing you won’t want to backdate!

BARTENDER: I once went out with a chick on a backdate. It was fun, we did everything in reverse.

JEFF: Oh, so you like it in reverse.

BOUNCER: You have a good sense of humor, I’d like to hook you up to the “coolometer” just to get a reading….. oh…. 7, not bad. Better than Jeremy. He only got a 6 which is still passable.

MAY: So, who got a 10 for coolness.

BOUNCER: A guy in New York. But, he never shows up. He’s studying four different languages and has a million different interests. I wish he would come her. I wish for that matter I could bounce people in as well as bounce them out.

JEREMY: Now there’s a thought. What about taking a course on how to raise our coolness level so we’ll be prepared when you hook us up to the coolometer.

BOUNCER: Didn’t you write an article on Bad Boy Notaries? Just read that article again and again — I think that will raise you at least a point right there.

JEFF: Okay, this time I’m really going…. and as always — stay cool and… don’t drink and sign!!!

You might also like:

A bar only for “cool” Notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=22546

Are you a bad boy Notary?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=22380

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June 8, 2021

Julius Caesar Notary Public

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 11:27 am

I don’t think that Julius Caesar was a Notary, but they had Notaries in Rome, and Rome is one of the ancestors of American civilization along with Greece, Israel, Sumeria, France, and England. It is interesting to know that our culture derives originally from Iraq. I wonder what Saddam would have to say about that. They invented the clock with 12 hours and 60 minutes, etc. This silly story is about the American version of Julius Caesar and I got the story as close to the real story as it can possibly be in modern America if you over look the fact that Americans normally drink champagne in hot tubs and not sangria… details.

Julius started his career in escrow in Missouri. Things were good until he went on vacation to the Caribbean and got kidnapped by pirates. He escaped by the grace of God after having a seizure, and then bought a slave who was an expert in Greek philosophy to teach his beloved daughter. He brought the slave back to Rome, Missouri where he lived in this fictional blog article. Think of this as a modern day Julius… you know… with the straight cut bangs… not really my style, but it works for him.

He continued his career while his slave educated his daughter in the classics, and then a terrible tragedy happened. His wife died, and he was devastated.

Disclaimer to the Black Lives Matter movement… The slave was a white guy who looked Greek and thought Greek. So, that makes it okay… I guess…

Meanwhile in Julius’ home town of Rome, Missouri, the mayor made some law changes that allowed him to kill anyone who he claimed was a threat to him. Since Julius was honest and said he would kill the mayor on a whim, the mayor let him live. Then the mayor made his collegue Pompey kill someone else otherwise he would have someone kill Pompey. The citizens of the town had had it, and Pompey poisoned the mayor, and the mayor died in a hot tub. What a scandal. But, on a brighter note, there were no prostitutes involved, so that makes it less bad.

Julius was so stressed out by the situation, he had a seizure. Maybe we should call him Julius Seizure since he had seizures, not Caesars. On the other hand, the Caesar salad works for many people, so perhaps we should leave the name as is.

After that, Julius decided to become a Notary and do some conquering. He conquered the business from all Escrow companies in towns with French names in the midwest. Since that area used to belong to France, there were plenty. He spent eight years conquering what he called France or Gaul, and developed a business so huge, he had to hire many to help him. He spent most of his time away from home wooing more new clients and rarely returned home.

Finally after conquering the Gauls in the French named towns, Julius returned to his home town only to find that Pompey and his colleagues wanted to kill him due to a disagreement about some local political decision they were lobbying local government about. Julius hired a bodyguard, and later learned that Pompey had been killed at an Egyptian restaurant several hours Southeast of their town — that was famous for lamb kabobs and belly dancing. Julius went to the Egyptian restaurant and inspected the severed head of his rival that the Pharaoh kept for him in a basket. He then returned to his hometown.

His new wife had a terrible dream that the windows came open, lots of wind came in, and that she found his body covered in blood in the bed. Julius disregarded the dream. Then a wise elder said, “Beware of the Ides of March.” Julius went to town hall to take part in a political discussion. The friends of the late Pompey were there and stabbed him to death.

After the stabbing, someone mentioned to the old man, “The Ides of March have already come.” The old man said, “Yes, but they haven’t left yet.”

So, this is the Notary version of the story of Julius Caesar. My parting words are —

“He who lives by the seal, dies by the seal.” and
“All roads lead to Rome, MO” (yes, it exists, but few roads actually lead there)
“When in Roam (on your cell phone coverage) do as the Roamers do!”
“A great Notary business isn’t built in a day, but if you work on your notes section, at least you are giving yourself a chance.”

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June 2, 2021

New Notaries vs. Veteran Notaries

Filed under: General Articles — admin @ 10:36 am

The behavior of the newer Notaries doesn’t match the older Notaries on 123notary.com.

THE OLD NOTARIES
The old Notaries have been around for ten or twenty years.

Certifications
Many passed our certification test in the old days, but did not bother with the audit retest which consisted of a few Notary questions which are not easy, but you need to know it anyway. Older Notaries tend to be NNA certified which is the easiest of all the tests from prominent agencies, but they rarely pass the LSS, 123notary, or Notary2Pro tests which are hard.

Social Media
The old Notaries used to be very active on forums, linked in, facebook, but not so much on Twitter. But, in the past few years, the older Notaries got tired, died, quit, or stopped being so active on social media.

How They Maintain Their Listing
Additionally, the older Notaries do not do much with their profiles on 123notary. They let the profiles sit and collect cyber dust instead of asking for reviews. 123notary has a lot less online reviews than several years ago because people are not being proactive as much anymore.

THE NEW NOTARIES
The new Notaries are generally in their first or second year of business as a signing agent.

Certifications
Roughly 30-35% of the newer Notaries are LSS certified and close to 90% are NNA certified. A handful are Notary2Pro Certified and we get a trickle passing our 123notary online test as well every month. There seems to be more motivation to prove themselves so that they can make a name for themselves. This was not the case as much with newer Notaries even a few years ago.

Social Media
Newer Notaries seem to not do much on social media. NNA figured out how to get good interaction on their Facebook and a large proportion of the Notaries on there are new ones. The posts that good high quantities of interactions had yes/no answers. So, the quantity of the answers might look good, but the depth of the answers doesn’t compare to the veteran Notary crowd who have volumes to say. Not all oldsters are like this, but the people with long and thorough posts tend to have 15 years or more of experience, sonny.

How They Maintain Their Listing
Unfortunately, I have to get after most people to make their listing complete at least by my standards. A good presentation is life or death, but our Notaries don’t seem to have the motivation to do a quality job of their notes section on their own. This is sad. Even the people paying $400 per year need to be babysat in terms of their notes, reviews, and other aspects of listing maintenance.

SUMMARY
So, things have really changed. My wish is that people will put more effort into their career. I feel happier when people take life more seriously. I am not saying that people are not serious, but they tend to shirk what I consider to be reasonable responsibilities.

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May 26, 2021

A therapist becomes a signing agent

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 6:33 am

Jeff the therapist gets tired of dealing with insurance companies, secretaries, and the daily hassle of being a psychotherapist and longs to become a Mobile Notary. However, he seems to have trouble transitioning into his new life.

JEFF: He, my name is Jeff Winkler and I am here to facilitate the signing of your refinance. Do you have any prior medical conditions I should know about?

SIGNER: No

JEFF: Are you on any medications that could complicate our signing?

SIGNER: Ummm. Lipitor

JEFF: Oh, is your cholesterol high?

SIGNER: No, because I take Lipitor. If I didn’t take Lipitor, then my cholesterol would be high.

JEFF: I understand. Do you ever hear voices?

SIGNER: I think we all hear voices. My wife is the only big voice that I hear.

THE WIFE: I heard that!

JEFF: Great, well here is the package. Can we sit at the dining room table?

SIGNER: Fine

JEFF: Will your insurance be covering the signing?

SIGNER: I think the Notary fees is listed on the TRID or the Settlement Statement. It’s $200 and out of that I’m sure they pay you at least $35.

JEFF: Yup, sounds like your insurance company covered it and is giving the service provider their usual 20% or so for doing 99% of the work. Let’s see…. Now, here is your rate and on this other document your APR. The APR is higher than the rate, how does that make you feel?

SIGNER: It’s supposed to be higher because it incorporates fees and closing costs into the percentage plus it’s compounded.

JEFF: Aren’t I supposed to explain that to you? Maybe you should be the signing agent.

SIGNER: Does that bother you?

JEFF: No, but it perplexes me. Perhaps you have been through this several times and know the drill. I’m still fresh out of medical school with Loan Signing Systems. I just got a degree in signing from them. Was your mother also a borrower?

SIGNER: We had a loan under my father’s name as a child.

JEFF: How did that make you feel?

SIGNER: I think that is pretty standard. I was not aware of my parents’ financial arrangements.

JEFF: So you had no feelings about that. Uh-huh. I’m taking notes. Do you feel comfortable signing the entire package?

SIGNER: I’m already 90% done.

JEFF: Yes, and on this document here, you need to sign with your middle initial.

SIGNER: Yes, I will… By the way… How does that make you feel?

JEFF: I feel a sense of completeness when you use that middle initial. Something I never felt as a child.

SIGNER: I’m afraid our time is up.

JEFF: Hey! I’m supposed to say that. You’ve taken over my job as a Signing Agent AND as a therapist.

SIGNER: How does that make you feel?

JEFF: It makes my life easier and it provides comic relief?

SIGNER: Great, next time you can lie on the couch during our session. I’m doing a construction loan and I’ll request you. I run a few businesses and we are always doing signings.

JEFF: Oh, perfect. Here’s my card. I also do Weddings and Bar-Mitzvahs

SIGNER: Mazel-Tov. See you next time. There’s a Fedex station around the corner on Wilshire. It’s open late.

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May 18, 2021

Notary Motivational Speaker

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 12:32 am

There are a few people in particular Notary agencies who do a certain degree of motivational speaking for Notaries. Normally they do this for the purpose of sales, or in my case to get you to study harder and write more in your notes sections. But, what if there were someone who specialized in Notarial motivational speaking? What would his name be? How about Chad Robbins, and we can pretend he is a distant cousin of my favorite motivational speaker Tony Robbins.

Chad never did well in school, or anything else he tried. He was failing in life. The only thing he had in his favor was that he was motivated, and could get other people motivated. He was at a job interview, and there were twelve others in the waiting room. He got them all pumped up for the interview, so that one of them got the job, but he did not. He couldn’t figure out what to do with his life. Years went by doing dead end jobs. He languished in despair, contemplated suicide, and moped around. Finally, out of the blue, someone came to him and said, “Why don’t you become a motivational speaker for Notaries?” He said, “Great, but what’s a Notary?” So, he took the 123notary certification course after becoming a Notary and signed up on 123notary.com — at least in the story he did. He learned from Jeremy how to motivate Notaries to greatness and decided to work with that and expand upon it. He became the greatest Notary motivational speaker ever.

CHAD: Working on that notes section will reward you for the rest of your career.

NOTARY: I know, I know, I know.

CHAD: What are you doing that is more important than creating that benefit for yourself which will probably translate into tens of thousands in extra revenue over the next ten years.

NOTARY: I have to clean the house and I have an assignment tomorrow.

CHAD: Will the assignment pay you $10,000?

NOTARY: No, of course not. They don’t pay enough. I’m only getting $60 if they pay me.

CHAD: If I had $1000 in my right hand that you could have if you wrote a good notes section and $20 in my left hand that I would just give you now, which would you take.

NOTARY: That’s easy, the $20 in the left hand so I would have time to do my crummy $60 signing tomorrow.

CHAD: You are a difficult case. It only takes a few hours of reading and modifying your notes to have a listing that stands out. If you don’t, you might get ignored and not even be able to survive in the Notary business.

NOTARY: Motivating with fear. Okay, you win. I’ll postpone the laundry, but if I get another $60 signing, I’ll take it before I complete my notes so that I have something to whine about.

CHAD: Good. Read the “Your notes section” category in the 123notary blog for tips and take notes. With your experience of 500 loans signed you will have something to talk about for sure.

——– (end of scene)

CHAD: Linda, you are a new Notary, but you have no certifications. How will you stand out with potential clients?

LINDA: Oh, I’m certified by the State of New Hampshire.

CHAD: That’s not a certification, that is a commission. Getting a loan signing certification from one or more of the three best programs will help attract serious clients. It takes some work, but that work is what is going to jump start your career.

LINDA: I don’t have time. I have a $40 signing tomorrow. They are ripping me off.

CHAD: With no certifications and no experience you are lucky that people are even giving you a chance. The time you invest in Notary education will come back to you for the rest of your career. It only takes an hour per day for a month or two and you can be solid in your knowledge. That normally translates into an average increase of revenue per signing and also a lot more signings.

LINDA: I’ll wait until I’m really bored and then I’ll think about it.

CHAD: Older Notaries who don’t have credentials get used because of name recognition. They have been in the game for years. But, newer Notaries have no credibility at all. Let’s look at the search results on 123notary. Look, see Susie, she has four certifications as a signing agent, is a member of five Notary organizations, wrote a very comprehensive and well organized notes section and has a registered company name. Look at her, and then look at your notes section with your one liner that says, “Hi, my name is Linda. I am a Notary. I will travel. Call me first.” Why would anyone call you, when Suzie looks ten times as good as you.

LINDA: Oh my God, I never saw it that way. You win. I’ll buy the LLS, Notary2Pro and 123notary certifications and start studying. I will not be outdone by another woman!

CHAD: And remember — you need to be PASSIONATE about whatever you are doing. Live with ENTHUSIASM (raises fist in the air.)

LINDA: With me it’s not about passion. It’s about one-up-man-ship. I can’t stand the idea that someone else looks better than me. I’ll outdress her too. You’ll see. What does she wear?

CHAD: It says business casual.

LINDA: Well then I’ll wear fancier business casual or business formal. She will have something to worry about now.

CHAD: I’m not sure what I did. But, I hit the right button by mistake. Motivational speaking is all about pressing people’s emotional buttons. Greed, fear, revenge, passion, one-up-woman-ship, desire, vision, etc. Some people are more noble in their aspirations while others are more jealous, but I’ll get results any way I can.

BOTTOM LINE
If you write a thorough notes section on your listing, ask for help from Jeremy proofreading it, and get a few certifications, you will look really good to the clients. Get a few reviews as well from clients even if they found you somewhere else. The time you invest in bettering your listing could be worth more than $1000 per hour in long term benefits because you might keep your listing for ten years and reap the benefits every day for those ten years which can add up.

It is worth it to sacrifice less critical short term things you want to do for long term goals of studying, and refining your marketing presence. It doesn’t take that much time. If you compare it to the time you invested in high school or college, this is nothing, but the payback is often huge.

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May 4, 2021

18 things you can do to offer better customer service as a notary

Filed under: Best Practices — admin @ 10:37 am

Most Notaries complain that they don’t get enough work. Others complain that they get too much work, but not enough of the good work. Life is like this. But, by providing super customer service, you will get more repeat clients and that is one of the most potent secrets to success. Here are some customer service tips for Notaries.

1. Answer questions the way they were asked
Don’t talk too much or give answers that beat around the bush or go on tangents. Pleasantly stick to the facts and answer the question.

2. Answer the phone stating your name
Don’t say, “Hello.” Let the world know who you are. After all, what if they think they dialed incorrectly? Also, they will feel that you are more professional if you do.

3. Avoid background noise during calls.
Apologize if you are in a noisy place and try to go to a quiet place. Make sure your radio, television, and children are “off” before you pick up the phone, otherwise excuse yourself. Most children’s mouths come with an off switch, it’s doesn’t always function though.

4. Be on time
Commentary: arrive slightly early and wait.

5. Confirm the signing and ask a long list of pertinent questions.
That way your signing will go smoothly.

6. Dress nicely
People are shallow and judge you based on how you dress. I’m not like that, but then you should see how I dress. I judge you on what you know, how cooperative you are, and if you are reliable. Your nice clothes are the icing on the cake if you have the other qualifications. Business casual is recommended for all three genders. There are three now, right?

7. Don’t discuss politics or religion
I know, in 2020 that is easier said than done. Our whole existences are controlled by our fascist governors who won’t even let us have Thanksgiving the way we want. Next thing you know they will say, “No cranberry sauce by decree of the emperor!!!” As a general rule, be polite and don’t upset anyone in any way.

8. Park where they want you to park, or park in the street if possible.

9. Introduce yourself at the door and briefly explain your function. Then find a nice table to sign on. Let them choose where to sign, but you do need a flat surface.

10. Explain, but not too much
If you are trained in introducing the documents, if your state allows that, then do it. But, don’t explain the legal meanings of the documents otherwise you are playing Mortgage broker or Attorney. Vague descriptions of what the documents are about is okay, and where critical information is works. Explaining the terms of the loan is not a good idea.

11. Ask them if they have any other questions
Some people have notary questions or spiritual questions. You might be seen as helpful if you help them with those. For spiritual questions, my suggestion for a canned answer would be to give them a serious and caring look and say, “Stay centered.”

12. You can ask them if they have anything else that needs to be notarized.
It doesn’t offer to do more at no extra cost. That increases your chance of getting a valuable review exponentially.

13. Some small talk is good
Small talk is very cultural. Americans seem to like it while Germans and Koreans seem to not like it. Africans like small talk, big talk or any kind of talk and tend to be more sociable than the rest of us. My analysis is that the less a culture engages in talking, the more successful they are. But, you will be seen as nice if you make just the right amount of small talk without getting into any uncomfortable issues, such as how you like Gretchen Witmer’s (D Michigan) new haircut or policy as to whether or not humans should be allowed to leave their house.

14. After you are done
Let them know you will drop the FedEx right away, and then do that. They want to know their documents are in good hands.

15. If there is a problem
Make sure you have all the contact numbers of the Lenders, Brokers, Title people, etc. You might need to call them to resolve some issues. Being prepared and helpful wins the game.

16. Resolve all issues with animals beforehand
If you have issues with cats, dogs, gerbils, oxen, etc., let them know before the signing so they can put them behind a locked door that doesn’t open on its own, hence the term locked.

17. Don’t show them your gun or pepper spray

18. Notary humor sometimes works
You can tell them about the notary who was asked to notarize a mannequin. But, the notary who was dragged into a bedroom by the hot female signer… save that one for a signer you know a little better. The joke about how many notaries you need to screw in a lightbulb is generally safe.

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