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May 23, 2019

How weak are you with sob stories at the signing table?

Filed under: Technical & Legal — Tags: , — admin @ 11:04 am

Many people will plead with you to do something illegal like notarizing without a signature or without a clear signature. The signer might be close to death or in the hospital or in jail. You might hear an unbelievable good sob story told with tears coming out of somebody’s eyes. The question you should ask yourself is, how badly do you want to end up in jail?

If your goal as a notary is to please the client, find another profession. Your goal should be to please the government and uphold all applicable laws. If you have any time or patience after that, then you can be nice to the clients. You are a No-tary, not a Yes-tary and you can get thrown in jail. So, please learn how to deal with sob stories. I had to deal with one with a dying elderly Chinese man who communicated by squeezing your hand once for yes and twice for no. The squeezing was so unclear I told them to get an attorney and that I didn’t want to get in trouble. Squeezing hands is not a language I speak. South African clicking? Now that’s a different story (songs only and no conversation — sorry.)

Your job is to feel sorry for your government trying to keep law and order. So, choose your allies carefully based on what they can do to you and not on the $10 they might pay you. The End!

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May 22, 2019

Jaywalking with Jay Leno and a few Notaries

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 11:31 am

I was just watching Jay Leno on youtube and was wondering what would happen if he did his routine on people about Notary work.

JAY: Let me ask you something. What do you call the place where a Notary is taking place?

JAMES: That’s easy… the place!

FRED: Wait, wouldn’t it be the locality.

SALLY: How about an SS. Isn’t that on the form?

JAMES: No, that’s a World War Two German soldier.

JAY: Can you explain to me what an Affiant is?

MANDY: I’m stumped. Isn’t that a document that goes to a different country?

SARAH: No, that’s Apostille.

JAY: Name one country in Africa

CRAIG: Ummm. France?

JAY: Name one Notary act

JAMES: Ummm, a subscribing witness?

JAY: That’s a person not an act. Hmm. I’m beginning to see why so many people are upset with Jeremy. He’s asking them questions they don’t have a clue about. No wonder they are mad. Why don’t they just study. They are supposed to know this stuff anyway, aren’t they?

JEREMY: Yes. It is not only bad that most Notaries don’t know their basics, but dangerous to those who hire them and all parties involved in any transaction they notarize.

JAY: Okay Jeremy. Name a country in Africa.

JEREMY: Sierra Leone, illegal diamond trafficking capitol of Africa. And then there is Lethotho, a landlocked country within South Africa where they speak Khosa, the language with the clicking sounds. Let’s not forget about Djibouti, a small country near the Tigri region of Ethiopia where they eat injira with durham wheat as their staple food.

JAY: You lost me on that one. All I want to know is ….

JEREMY: No, they do not drive classic cars in those countries… probably..

JAY: You read my mind.

.

You might also like:

What are Jeremy’s favorite blog entries?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18837

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May 21, 2019

A lady Notary gets a request for backdating. Hear this brilliant solutions

Filed under: Technical & Legal — admin @ 11:05 am

This is a tip from one of our most seasoned Notaries that we’ve ever had. What season? Hmmm. Autumn! She got a request for backdating. She says it is hard to get the request in writing.

If it were me I would tell them — just put the job specifications in writing and I will deal with it accordingly.

That way I am not incriminating myself, but I sure as hell will report their (&*#) to the Sec of State once I get that instruction sheet telling me what date to put in my journal and on the documents. That is fraud central.

So, yet another great tip from one of our great Notaries relayed to you by me… the messenger!

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May 20, 2019

Are you a residence or a business owner?

Filed under: Business Tips — admin @ 11:05 am

Many of you Notaries behave more like a residence than a business owner. It is not very professional. When I call you I get a “hello?” and not a “Sampson signings, Judy speaking.” I am not the only one who cares about professionalism. The other thing is that if you are eating dinner you often refuse to talk. If you are a business forget about dinner and focus on the task at hand. Do you complain that people call you on a Sunday? That means you think of yourself as a residence. If you get mad when people call you after 9pm that means you think of your operation as a residence.

The fact is that whether you are registered or not, since you take money for offering a service, or are offering to do so, technically you could be legally construed as a business. So, get registered to keep it legal and start thinking of your self as a business. Maybe then you will start acting like a business.

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May 19, 2019

Testing Carmen on a bridge in 2003.

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 11:29 am

Ah, another trip down memory lane. Notaries got very upset about my testing in 2017 and 2018. What they need to realize is that 123notary has been testing people from the very beginning, just not so frequently. Since there was so much hostility to my testing and so little appreciation from title companies, as of August 2018 I am cutting the testing to a minimum and doing it mainly by email.

But, back in 2003, I wanted to get Carmen certified. I am the kind of guy who just wants to get it done so I can move on to the next thing. but, Carmen wasn’t ready. She was driving over this huge long bridge down near the port of San Pedro. She was lost, confused, afraid, and not sure what to do once she got to the end of the bridge. Which way should she turn, where do we go now, where do we go now?

I was in a hurry to get Carmen certified, so I asked her a bunch of questions. She was a bit flustered, but she passed. Oh, what a relief. Sometimes when you just want to get the job done you have to just get it done. But, thinking back, next time I test someone on a bridge, I’ll give them the abridged version.

My philosophy is that if you know your stuff, you should be able to test anytime and anywhere – even in your sleep. But, I won’t call after 9pm unless you advertise as a 24 hour notary.

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May 18, 2019

Don’t hate the portal — hate the game

Filed under: Signing Company Gossip — Tags: — admin @ 11:06 am

A notary on our blog posted a comment calling SnapDocs, “SnapCrap” because the job offers were not worth taking. But, SnapDocs is not responsible for the bad offers, they just provide a super-efficient portal. Don’t hate the portal — hate the game. If the staff at SnapDocs could talk to that Notary, they would call her a “Portal-hater.” And just because you got played, doesn’t make the portal bad.

There are other Notaries on SnapDocs that always get their desired fee. I’m not sure how that is humanly, logistically, or mathematically possible, but I have heard this before. Maybe they live in an area where the buyers are hard up. So, the bottom line is, just because one medium of advertising doesn’t work for you, doesn’t make it inherently bad.

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May 17, 2019

Can you scan loan docs back using a cell phone?

Filed under: Notary Mistakes — admin @ 11:08 am

Can you scan loan docs back using a cell phone?

Yes, but should you? Notaries commented on forums that cell phone scans are unclear and unprofessional. If you want to get fired, then do what you like. But, for nice clear scans, use a professional machine or better yet, get a portable.

You can use whatever equipment you like so long as the output is clear. Maybe a higher end iPhone will do the trick… or not. I don’t know because I am not a technical guy. Or better yet, ask your employer and they can recommend what they want. The main thing is to not get fired. You are not assigned notary work for your convenience but for the convenience of others — something that notaries conveniently forget!

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May 16, 2019

Notary Quiz of the day

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 11:30 am

Notaries hate being tested, but love reading Notary tests on blog entries for some reason. I’ll have to ask my psychic why that is. Maybe it is because they are not on the spot with this. Here is a fun quiz of the day.

1. Notaries notarize
(a) Documents
(b) People
(c) Signatures
(d) Signatures on Documents
(e) People’s signatures on documents.

2. Initials. If you initial a change on a loan document, where should the initial go?
(a) To the right of the crossed out text
(b) To the left of the crossed out test
(c) Above the crossed out text
(d) Anywhere around the crossed out text
(e) Below the crossed out text to the right.

The processor I used to work for did not want me to cross out the text, but initial below the text and below the right end of the text. The processing dept. would do the rest according to good old Emily. I wonder how she is.

3. What is the difference between a conflict of interest, interest, financial interest, and beneficial interest? This reminds me of the joke about the Mortgage Broker who left the industry in 2008 because he lost interest.

4. A Notary was asked to notarize a document with no signature line. What should the notary do?
(a) Ask the borrower to write in a signature line.
(b) Tell the borrower that he cannot notarize the document without a signature and signature line.
(c) Write in the signature line himself.
(d) Refuse to notarize the document.
(e) Call Carmen at 123notary and ask for help.

5. A Notary does a job for an old lady at a hospital notarizing a document. The notary asked the lady if she understood the document and she said yes. Two months later all parties were in court because the lady did not understand what she had signed. What should the notary have done?
(a) Ask the lady to paraphrase the document.
(b) Tell the lady how he went to the white house to visit President Johnson and see how she reacts.
(c) Stick to jail signings — they might be criminals, but at least they are in their right mind (whatever that means.)
(d) Start a conversation about current events to do a “reality test.”

6. A Notary was asked to notarize at the peace process. The Palestinians said you can’t have peace without a process. The Israelis said you can’t have peace without security. The Notary said you can’t have a notarization without a signature. After a long discussion, the Palestinians wanted to be acknowledged twice for one signature, Since the Israelis wouldn’t acknowledge the existence of their people, at least a Notary could acknowledge their signature twice to compensate. What is wrong with this picture?

(a) The Palestinians wanted to trade one Israeli signatures they had captive for two hundred Palestinian signatures as a peace initiative.
(b) The signer is the only one who can acknowledge a signature, not a Notary.
(c) An Israeli Notary will not acknowledge a Palestinian signature until they acknowledge the State of Israel’s signature.
(d) Yes, a single signature can be acknowledged multiple times, but it is the signer who does the acknowledging.

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May 15, 2019

The NNA is copying our style with Notary 101

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 11:08 am

A few years ago 123notary created a blog course entitled Notary Public 101. But, now I see that on the NNA’s site they have something called Notary 101 which is basic information reference material about what notaries do. I feel that they are copying my style. On the other hand, neither 101 of us invented the concept. I think that colleges or authors long time ago invented this style. In any case, what they wrote about is very different than our course and please do not confuse the two (or the 202). NNA and 123notary are NOT the same thing, our certifications, advertising and writing styles are NOT the same. Please do not confuse us and most of all, please do not call us Notary123 as that just sounds ignorant kind of like how Archie Bunker says ay-talian.

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May 14, 2019

30 year rates took a dive in January giving new hope to struggling Notaries

Filed under: Marketing Articles — admin @ 11:10 am

Meet Jane in South Dakota who just got through a polar vortex. She suffered freezing pipes, the risk of frostbite, being stuck at home, not to mention not being able to get Ramen noodles.. you know, the oriental flavor that is so much fun to garnish with sliced celery and eat with chopsticks. Well, I bet these lower interest rates are a happy surprise to Jane. That means a sudden increase in Notary work, and might lead also to better weather.

123notary’s sales are up about 7% from last year. Facebook is still sluggish and the forum is almost dead though. But, there is hope, hope for a better future.

30 year interest rates went down below 4.5% for the first time since April 2018. The question is, will they stay this low or get lower? If so, then Notaries will get work. If they go up, I might have to learn how to import plastic buddhas from China and compete with buddhasforless.com and they are a tough competitor.

See this link for a graph of 30 year interest rates
https://ycharts.com/indicators/30_year_mortgage_rate

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