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February 10, 2017

A Notary goes Public on Shark Tank with Shazamdocs!

First up into the tank: A way to keep records on how long companies take to send electronic documents.

NOTARY: Hi, Sharks. I’m Jeremy. And I’m asking for $200,000 for twenty percent of my company, Shazamdocs. Sharks, there’s one thing that matters in life more than looking as dapper as Mr. Wonderful here.

MR. WONDERFUL: He knows of what he speaks.

LAURIE: He’s kissing up and I’m throwing up.

MR. WONDERFUL: Hush. Grab a breath mint.

NOTARY: What matters in life, whether you’re sharks or whether you’re a notary, is knowing when you’ll be paid!

MR. WONDERFUL: You’re speaking my language, son. The language of luv… of money.

NOTARY: The database on Shazamdocs monitors how long companies take to send electronic documents, and… by virtue of our exclusive algorithms… computes the average amount of time it takes to get paid. No longer will you have to waste your precious time and resources hitching yourself to companies that drag their feet when it comes to upholding their end of the transactions.

DAYMOND: Feet dragging is a drag.

NOTARY: We’re like Yelp for notaries. With your help, sharks, we’ll get this in the homes of notaries throughout the country, and after that, the world! Who wants to show this notary their own seal… of approval?

ROBERT: You, yourself, said you’re like Yelp for notaries. There’s nothing proprietary about that.

NOTARY: I’ve applied for a utility patent.

CUBAN: You’ll never get it.

LAURIE: Mark.

CUBAN: What? He’s living a pipe dream. What’s to stop anybody from charting the records of companies to see how quickly they pay their bills?

NOTARY: Nobody does it like we do.

CUBAN: I’m out.

MR. WONDERUL: Ouch.

CUBAN: What about you, Kevin? You said the guy knows of what he speaks.

MR. WONDERFUL: That’s when he was complimenting my impossibly dapper qualities.

LAURIE: You got the impossibly part right.

ROBERT: What do you sell the program for and what are your sales?

NOTARY: I sell it with an annual subscription rate of 19.95. And we’re in pre-launch.

DAYMOND: Uh-oh. So you’ve made bupkis.

ROBERT: Daymond, I didn’t even know you were Jewish!

MR. WONDERFUL: I’ll make you an offer. I don’t know what you’re worth, I’m taking a heck of a risk, but I’ll go on the ride with you. There are plenty of notaries who need greater assurances they’ll get paid faster. But $200,000 at twenty percent assumes a value of a million dollars. You’re not there yet. I’ll give you the $200,000. But I want forty percent of the business.

CUBAN/DAYMOND/ROBERT: Oy.

LAURIE: You’re all Jewish now.

MR. WONDERFUL: I hear the other sharks flapping their gums, but I don’t hear anyone putting their money where their yappers are. I made you an offer, Jeremy. What do you say?

NOTARY: I appreciate the offer, Mr. Wonderful.

ROBERT: If I brought a notary in, would you swear to that?

NOTARY: But with all due respect, that’s giving up too much equity. I’d like to hear what the remaining sharks have to say.

LAURIE: As you know, Jeremy, as I’ve said many times on Shark Tank. I can tell when something’s a zero. And I can tell when something’s a hero. And this… is most definitely… a thirty. Better than zero, but nowhere near a hero. I’m out.

ROBERT: Laurie, you were toying with the man.

LAURIE: No, I wasn’t. I’m just being honest.

ROBERT: Well, Jeremy, I see nothing proprietary here. And I’m not a big notary guy. If I ever need you to witness something, I’ll be a customer. But I don’t see it as an investment. I’m out.

CUBAN: So that leaves Mr. Wonderful’s less than wonderful offer. And Mr.Daymond.

DAYMOND: I hate it when companies drag their feet before paying somebody what they’re owed, so I’m with you there.

JEREMY: Would you consider joining up with Mr. Wonderful?

DAYMOND: As much as it pains me to say it, I might do the deal with Kevin, if he’s up for it.

MR. WONDERFUL: I’d do that deal. But, Jeremy, you’d be getting two sharks.

JEREMY: Would the both of you consider the deal for… thirty percent equity?

DAYMOND: 100 K each at fifteen percent each? What do you think, Kevin?

MR. WONDERFUL: I’ll do it with one contingency. That we test the accuracy of your program on us. If your program can tell us how long it’ll be before we pay you the 200 K, I’m in.

DAYMOND: Me too.

JEREMY: Right away?

MR. WONDERFUL: Sorry. I would’ve paid you after hell freezes over.

DAYMOND: Me too.

MR. WONDERFUL/DAYMOND: I’m out!

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You might also like:

See our string of posts about Notary Shark Tank
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=shark-tank

See our string on posts about Snapdocs
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=snapdocs

FASS has a brand new app
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17477

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November 15, 2016

How to spot fake ID at a notarization

Most Notaries study Notary law. But, do we keep handbooks that are up to date about spotting fake ID’s? Perhaps we should . Our primary task as a Notary is not to make people feel good, and is not to get the job done either. It is to identify signers and make sure that fraud doesn’t take place. It is better to say “no” rather than to get a Notary job done wrong — hence the name “no”–tary. Otherwise we would be yestaries and the world would go down the tubes.

ID Handbooks
The NNA and other vendors have books going over every state’s identification documents. They can tell you about distinguishing features, new watermarks, and other telltale signs that the ID is genuine.

Jeremy’s Solution — an online ID database
Personally, I think there should be a computer system to let the Notary look you up on a Federal or state database — but, that’s just me.

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Things to look for one the ID

(1) Physical Description
Sometimes the physical description doesn’t match the signer. With ladies changing their hairstyle frequently, it is hard to tell their identity.

(2) Mispellings
Then, there could be misspellings in the name or a wrong name variation.

(3) Tampering
Obvious signs of tampering are almost a guarantee of a fake ID. I saw one of those once and only once.

(4) Watermarks
Finally watermarks are used in identification documents and currency to prove authenticity. It is possible, but hard for a fraud to replicate an authentic watermark. In China I’m sure they’ll figure it out as faking things is their specialty. But, for the rest of us it would not be so easy.

(5) Lack of raised lettering
Many of the newer ID’s have raised lettering. However, without a guidebook, you won’t know which states and which identification years of issue have raised letters.

(6) What’s your sign?
Ask the signer their sign. If they are using a fake ID with wrong DOB it will be very difficult for them to immediately recite their sign. You can also ask for their zip code to spot a fraud.

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Most Notaries do not inspect ID’s carefully. They just record the information in their journal. Unless something fake is jumping out at them, they will not notice that something is wrong. It pays to get a handbook and become and expert. After all, the whole point of being a Notary is to deter fraud. In my opinion, each state’s Notary division should require all Notaries to be experts at spotting fake ID’s in addition to other critical related skills. Maybe one day technology and training will improve.

Smokey bear says — say no to forest fires. Notary Jer says — say no to fake notary identifications — if you can spot them.

You might also like:

Seven error free ways to identify a signer
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15288

Notarized document expired identification
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=8294

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November 1, 2016

Can you charge a 2nd trip fee?

Filed under: Notary Fees & Pricing — Tags: , — admin @ 11:29 pm

Technically, Notaries can charge a 2nd trip fee. You get paid for what you do, right? But, signing companies are not always willing to pay for this. If the Notary made an error, the Notary should go back for free. But, if the Title company or Lender made a mistake, they will expect you to go back out and then often try not to pay you.

You need to keep accurate records of who paid for what job and with what check number. Signing companies send lots of checks out, but the record keeping system is based on the check number. They’ll try to sleeze out of paying you by referencing a check number.

Paypal is a nice way to pay for things because the records are queriable and you can mention what job or jobs you are paying for. That way, after the fact, you can quickly verify that you in fact were paid.

Another question is — should you stand your ground to collect that 2nd trip fee? If you have a good client, do they deserve a favor from time to time? Or are your fees by the book with no special gestures? If they need a second trip from time to time and they are a good company, then I might do it. But, if they are always late paying you and taking liberties, then perhaps not. You have to calculate this on your own. But, a good client is worth gold, so try to be nice to them in their hour of need.

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You might also like:

A comprehensive guide to Notary Pricing
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16504

Many Notaries who wouldn’t leave the house for <$125 are working for peanuts http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14953

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October 16, 2016

Best Virtual Notary Comedy Compilation Updated to 2018

Back in 2015, I created a list of the most popular virual notary comedy blog entries written so far. I decided to create an updated list with some of the more popular older entries and a few newer entries that were in the top 20% of popularity in their category. Enjoy!
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ALPHABETICAL BY THEME OR POST NAME
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Animals – 20 posts about animals at signings
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=3074

Apps – New Notary Apps for the iPhone 7 you’ve never dreamed of!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=10977

Apps – Honey you can kiss my app
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14902

Bartender Notary — a reverse mortgage on the rocks
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4080

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries Comedy String (popular)
Disclaimer: many of you are not able to discern between satire and racism and this is light-hearted satire and not demeaning to anyone. Please keep your comments polite or we will take action against you for slander.
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=black-notaries-versus-white-notaries

Children – Can I bring my 12 year old to a signing?

Can I bring my 12 year old to a signing?

Coffee — Notaries in cars getting coffee (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18945

Court – Noternity Court

Noternity Court

Dating – How Notary work is similar to online dating!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15763

Dating – Notary Dating & romance from A to Z (compilation)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17451

Debate – The 2016 Notary Public Debate
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16006

Disney Notary World (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18880

Driving – Notary Ed similar to Driver’s Education
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19132

Flashpoint – Notary job for a hostage with a multimillion dollar contract

Flashpoint — Notary job for a hostage with a multimillion dollar contract

George Lopez Notary Episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?s=george+lopez

Heaven & Hell Index of Posts
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16640

Health – Barack’s Notary-Care, are you covered?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16055

Hell – Notary Hell — Yeah, but it’s a dry heat!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13196

Hotel – The Sleezy Notary Motel
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16118

Hotel – Welcome to the Notary Hotel (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=8822

Identification – When someone does not have ID. new approaches!

What to do when someone doesn’t have their ID – new approaches

Jane the Virgin Notary (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14899

Lifestyles of the Rich and Infamous Signing Companies
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16715

Mafia – Compilation of Mafia Related Notary Posts
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20352

Mafia – Tony Soprano Gets Notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14897

Mafia – The Notary, The Mafia & The Fedex Drop Box
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6867

Medical – Pulling the plug; A Notary story
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13722

Notary Aptitude Test
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15853

Notary – Are you a Yes-tery or a No-tary?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16626

Notary – How Notary work is similar to online dating
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15763

Notary – The Noterator
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19116

Notary – You know you’re a notary when…
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16038

Politics – A Compilation of posts about politics relating to Notaries. Posts about Trump, Hillary, Jeff Sessions, Alt-Right, Bernie, Immigration, and Guest Speakers who get harrased by college students.
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20357

Politics – How Carmen dealt with some Alt-Right customers (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19092

Psychic – Psych Notary Episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?s=psych

Psychic – Notary Psychic Tarot Card Reading
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19126

Shark Tank — Self Driving Notary and other posts (popular string)
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=shark-tank

Sleep – Can you sign in your sleep? What would that be like?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18874

Social Media — Affiant: a social media site for Notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6410

Space – Notary Space Station: In space, nobody can hear you sign!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18920

Suicide – Notary Suicide Hotline (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6995

The Towles Booth
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=9456

Tourettes – Notary with Tourettes Syndrome (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18999

Train – The Notary Train
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18928

Transgender – A new acknowledgment form for transgender people

The new acknowledgment form for transgender people

Trump — Making American Notaries Great Again
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17023

Vampire Notaries – 24 hour service!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4094

Vietnam – Notarization in The Trang
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19652

Zoo – Welcome to the Notary Zoo (popular)
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15994

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You might also like:

Best Virtual notary Comedy Compilation 2015
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15957

Compilation of best Notary sit-com episodes
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15949

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October 12, 2016

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries — comedy edition

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Man, what’s the difference between white Notaries and black Notaries? I didn’t even know there was such a thing as a Notary until I was 19 and had to get a car title notarized. That was six months after I found out that isn’t is another way of saying ain’t. I would just assume that a bruthah would sign more smoothly than a white Notary.

CHRIS ROCK: In an ideal world, a white Notary would witness signatures, but a black Notary would have a body camera to make sure of what he witnessed.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: You’re making the Notary sound like the Dallas Police force. If I were a black Notary, I’d be more worried about being pulled over by the police. “Registration and Notary seal please, you know the drill.”

CHRIS ROCK: Yeah, but if Notaries were really like police, at loan signings, they would say, “Now reach for your ID, nice and slow — no sudden movements.” while they had the borrowers at gunpoint. I can’t imagine a signing like that — unless it happened in Detroit.

JERRY SEINFELD: And if you did a signing by X, if you knew who the signer had been seeing while married to his ex, then you’d know why she became an ex.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: I don’t think that signing by x is exactly like that, but I’m digging the way you think.

CHRIS ROCK: And by the way — black Notary lives matter, especially if they’re listed on 123notary.

JERRY SEINFELD: But, if you’re signing with an X, you didn’t come from the greatest school, unless you’re Malcolm X.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: With my luck, the minute I became commissioned as a Notary and got in my vehicle, within minutes of leaving the county clerk after taking my Oath, I’d probably get my ass pulled over by the Notary Police — but, for what I don’t know.

POLICE: Do you know how fast you were signing, son? Can I see your Notary Seal Please?

EDDIE GRIFFIN: I just got my Notary commission, I haven’t even used it yet. How come you didn’t pull that white Notary over?

POLICE: We don’t judge a Notary by the color of his ink, but by the content of his character.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Yeah, you’re a character all right.

POLICE: And by the way, the paper might always be white, but the ink is always black which in my opinion kind of evens the score.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Yeah, some things ain’t never gonna change.

POLICE: We just wanted to make sure you weren’t notarizing by text and driving at the same time. Just a routine check.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Yeah, stoppin’ brothers. What could be more routine than that?

JERRY SEINFELD: So, what’s the deal with white Notaries?

CHRIS ROCK: Isn’t that redundant? That’s even whiter than Conan O’Brien’s non-tan lines.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Man, what is it with white Notaries, ya know what I’m saying? I bet a white Notary would go to a signing in his nice family SUV, and he would park on the street just to be polite. And then he would knock on the door being exactly on time and say, “Hi, my name is Mike — I’m white, and I’m happy and I’ll be your Notary today.” I don’t want to white-wash this, but that’s how I see it.

CONAN O’BRIEN: Yeah, I bet if it were a black Notary he would say, “Hi, I’m Jermaine, and I’m the Notary with the smooth conversation. Check out this alligator skin briefcase. And you’d never believe the story behind it. I was down the street at my brother’s house and his kids were playing in the back yard. Then an alligator came out of nowhere — we live in Florida by the way. I rushed out at ninja speed to get those kids out the yard and got there just in time before that gator damn near bit my nephew’s arm off. Then, I drove home a block away and came back with my samurai sword. I bought it in Tokyo during a vacation and had it shipped to me as a decorative piece. I never dreamed that antique sword from the Mei-Jin period that was used by the great Zatoichi would ever be used again for practical purposes. So, I ran into the backyard with my samurai sword and said — hayyyyyaaa!!!! And I done chopped the gator’s jowels off. I sold the meat to a local taco place and had my neighbor make a briefcase out of it.

And… I got the smoothest pens you ever signed with. They’re like butter. These cost $200 and no — you may not keep them. But, enjoy the signing experience, my stories, and enjoy the ride. By the way — my ride is a stretch limo that I have parked outside. We can continue the signing there if you prefer — drinks included, but not until after you finish signing. And remember — sign responsibly!”

CHRIS ROCK: Yo Conan, you rock!

CONAN O’BRIEN: Ha ha, I’m a brutha with some street knowledge! And by the way, you not only rock, you are a Rock!

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Conan’s a brutha now? What????

JERRY SEINFELD: Black, white, yellow, brown, orange – believe me, none of us are happy.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: Brother, you just made me happy to hear that.

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You might also like:

Black Notaries vs. White Notaries — The Notary Manual
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19322

Honey you can kiss my app
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14902

Demographics in the mobile Notary business
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15359

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October 9, 2016

Notary Restaurant Posts Compilation

Filed under: Compilations,Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , — admin @ 9:33 pm

We keep writing more comedy posts about restaurants with a Notary theme. Here are the one’s we’ve done so far and there are more coming soon!

Notary Italian Restaurant
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16493

Sam’s Notary BBQ
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16490

Notary Indian Tandoori Restaurant
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16497

Notary Sushi Bar
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15093

Taqueria El Notario
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=9890

Notarizing at a sushi restaurant
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=22301

A bar only for cool notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=22546

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Related Posts

Notary Cheers: Sammy gets a name change form notarized
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=10016

Three Notaries go into a bar
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=3660

Notary Happy Days goes to China & has Chinese food
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16536

The Notary Dating Show
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15312

You know you’re a Notary when…
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16038

My date with Jeremy
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4473

Welcome to the Notary zoo
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15994

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October 2, 2016

Notary Dating & Romance from A to Z (Compilation)

Filed under: Compilations,Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , , , — admin @ 10:02 pm

Over the years, we’ve written many comedy posts on the subject of Notary dating. Here is a compilation of our best romantic Notary posts.

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Affiant — a social media site for Notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=6410
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But, I’m still a virgin!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14915
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Jane the Virgin Notary
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14899
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How Notary work is similar to online dating
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15763
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My date with Jeremy
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4473
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My 2nd date with Jeremy
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=7074
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My big phat geek wedding
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17053

Notarization on the Steve Harvey Show
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13704
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Notary Pick Up Lines Part 1
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=9851
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Two and a half Notaries — learning the ropes (string)
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=twoandahalfmen
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Yes, it’s the Notary dating show
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15312

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September 29, 2016

Notary Aptitude Test 2

(1) Notary Stamp is to Notary Seal what Attest is to:
(a) A test and a verbal verification (b) swearing and stating (c) The 123notary signing agent online test and proof (d) Oath and affirmation.

(2) Document Date is to Signing Date what Match.com date is to:
(a) Ditching date (b) Marriage date (c) Engagement date (d) Backdate (e) No relation

(3) Backdating is to signing what _____________ is to lying about your age.
(a) Match.com profiles (b) rescission date (c) Notary Applications (if you’re under 18 or not a US citizen) (d) notarizing an acknowledgment an hour before your signing appointment.

(4) Name on Title is to Name on a Document as name on Birth Certificate is to:
(a) Name on your ID (b) Your street aliases (c) Death Certificate (d) Mother’s maiden name

(5) Jurat is to Oath, what Oath is to:
(a) Quaker Oaths (b) Oath written text (c) Swearing (d) Attest

(6) Original document is to wet ink signature as commission paperwork is to:
(a) Secretary of State’s seal (b) name of your state (c) Felony conviction (d) Commission impossible

(7) Venue is to State what State is to:
(a) Secretary of State (b) City (c) County (d) Zip code

(8) Witness is to bank robbery what Notary act is to:
(a) Acknowledgment (b) Jurat (c) Protest (d) Unmarked Bills

(9) Subpoena is to testify what credible witness is to:
(a) Busy-body (b) Bank Robber (c) Subscribing Witness (d) Identify

(10) Middle initial is to document what ___________ is to identification
(a) Name (b) Middle Name (c) Matching or longer (d) Name on Title

(11) Digital signature is to an eSigning what a/an ________________ is to the future of the Notary profession.
(a) eDocuments (b) Notary (c) eNotary (d) 123notary

(12) SnapDocs is to the Notary Profession what Walmart is to:
(a) eBay (b) Retail (c) Amazon (d) Life

ANSWERS:

1. Note to readers, seal has two meanings. It could mean a stamp, or a signature). Answer (a) is correct even though it is part joke and part true.

2. (e) is the correct answer as the document date is arbitrary and could be any date, and has no relation to the signing date although it is commonly the same date as the signing date by convention.

3. (a) Match.com profiles typically have women who lie about their age and roll back the years about five to ten years. But, do men also backdate their age?

4. The name on Title is your official name that the property is registered to which carries a certain amount of official merit to it and permenance just like the name on your birth certificate. However, people do change their names after the fact that could lead to different names on the document or ID. Correct answer is (a).

5. (c) Swearing is a part of the Oath just like an Oath is a part of the Jurat process.

6-12 Figure it out on your own! That was fun!

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You might also like:

Notary Aptitude Test
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15853

Two & a Half Notaries: Detering Notary Fraud
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=10452

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July 13, 2016

Are you a Yes-tary or No-tary?

It was a month or so ago. I was asking Notaries Notary questions about what you can and cannot do. Unfortunately, Notaries often don’t take Notary rules seriously or have just never been adequately trained. The “more, but not less rule” is no good unless you understand which direction the rule runs. The ID can have more than the document, but 40% of Notaries think that it is okay if the name to be notarized on the document has more meat on it than the name on the identification. Good God! My point here, is that the whole point of having a Notary is to verify people’s identity who signed documents. The Notary profession helps to deter and prevent fraud as a result. But, if Notaries do whatever, and don’t follow state rules, then the purpose of having a Notary is defeated or undermined.

To put it shortly, the entire point of a Notary is to say No. If you feel uncomfortable or awkward saying No, then you should not become a Notary. In many Middle-Eastern and Asian cultures it is considered bad manners to say no, so they say, maybe, or later, or perhaps next time, or make up some excuse for not saying yes. Since they can’t outright say no, they beat around the bush. But, as a Notary, you might be facilitating fraud by not saying no. So, get used to saying no. Stand in front of the mirror and say, “No…. NO…. NO!!!!” Do it the way Joey from Friends practices saying, “How you doin’?” in front of the mirror dozens of times mastering his facial expression and verbal inflections. Take pride in saying no. However, for those Notaries that don’t like saying no, worry not! There is a solution. Become a Yes-tary.

But, what do Yes-taries do? Yestaries say yes to illegal requests. Unfortunately they cannot be commissioned and don’t have a stamp. But, maybe they should have an unofficial Yestary Public stamp just to make their job more comedically offiicial. What would be the duties of a Yestary? If someone wants to be Notarized as Mickey Mouse but lacks sufficient ID, you say, YES. If someone claims to be Kim Jong Un and looks Korean enough to you, say yes and stamp his document. If a Taiwanese client wants you to stamp a loose piece of paper because their government requires such a Yestary act, you can do it as a Yestary, but not as a Notary. Because a Notary’s job is to say No!

But, what if they won’t pay your travel fee if you say no? It is actually illegal in many states for a Notary to notarize a document in which they have a beneficial or financial interest. I feel that if the Notary will not get paid a travel fee if they refuse to notarize, then they now do have a beneficial interest of a sort and would be willing to break the law so they would get paid. Get your travel fee up front before you see the signers or the documents or the identifications. That way if a signer isn’t there, or if the name on the ID is not matching, or some other problem, you can forfeit your Notary fee, but still get paid for your trip. Remember, your job is not to please the client, but to uphold the law even if that means hurting someone’s feelings by saying no. Hurting someone’s feelings is better than going to court as a result of facilitating fraud or having your commission revoked!

One last note, it has been reported that some Yestaries have gotten a rare intestinal disease from saying yes too much to illegal requests. Some call it an illness, I call it karmic retrobution. The disease is called “yesentery” and comes from ingesting unclean Notary requests. If you get this disease, just consult your doctor and take some prescribed antibiotics. Good luck!

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You might also like:

Seven error free ways to identify a signer
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15288

ID: a growing problem
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15074

Credible witnesses: The process explained
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16695

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July 11, 2016

How to write a notes section if you are a beginner

We wrote a similar article on this aspect of Notary advertising a few years ago. I think it was very helpful. But, let me structure this article as a quick tips article with itemized things to add to your notes section. The basic idea is that if you have no experience, you cannot talk about what you’ve already done. So, talk about what you are willing to do, where you go, or what training you have had.

Don’t write three paragraphs telling us how many years of experience your mentor has otherwise we’ll stop looking at your profile and start looking at your mentor’s profile. Remember, you are selling yourself, not your mentor.

Don’t write six paragraphs telling us about your Real Estate career as nobody is hiring you as a Realtor on 123notary.com. That is something to write a single line about LOWER in your notes.

Don’t waste space telling us how you respect the integrity of the transaction and how confidentiality of the transaction is of utmost importance. That tells us nothing except that you are claiming not to be a conman.

Don’t tell us how important it is to hire a Notary who is experienced and knowledgable. You think the browsers don’t already know this? They have hired tens of thousands of Notaries and are hiring Notaries daily. They know what is important, the question is, are you the kind of Notary they want?

Don’t write two paragraphs about how you are a new mom. People will assume that when they call you they’ll hear screaming in the background. Focus on Notary work.

Don’t use adjectives. people who claim to be reliable, responsible, experienced, professional, accurate, etc., are people who have nothing good to say about themselves who compensate by using a bunch of unverifiable claims about themselves which are usually not true. Experts who hire Notaries see through the nonsense faster than you can say, “skip my listing.” So, don’t use adjectives unless you can back them up with real information. So, what should you write about?

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BASICS

Basic information should go at the top of your notes section. If you bury the most critical information where nobody can find it, they won’t hire you. Pertinent knowledge, radius, and special services are what people need to know about first. Don’t bury this in a long paragraph about how wonderful you are!

Last Minute Signings — It is sometimes hard to find someone who accepts signings at the last minute. If you do, that really helps.

Hours — Letting the world know how early you start and how late you finish can really help.

Languages — Fluent in Thai? Let them know. There is more demand for Spanish and Vietnamese though based on word on the street. Also let us know if you are fluent, or only conversational. If you cannot get through a signing with your language, save us the trouble and don’t mention it.

Hospitals & Jails — Most Notaries aren’t experienced with these types of signings which are more demanding. Let people know if you do.

100 mile Radius — Most Notaries are wishy-washy about how far they go. They have three paragraphs of information about exceptions to the rule like if their coffee wasn’t good that morning, they won’t go too far into Morgan County, but if you pay extra they might consider Strantom County. Just list your radius and your counties without all of the hype please. Nobody has time for this.

Counties Covered — List as many counties as you can if you want to get lots of jobs. If you cover counties that nobody else does, even if it is a long drive, you might get a lot of new clients as a result.

Loans & Documents — List all types of documents or loans you know how to sign including types of loans. Most Notaries say they are familiar with most legal documents. This is vague. It is better to list the top several legal documents you see a lot of.

Catchy Phrase — Sometimes a catchy phrase about yourself, your business or service can win the game. Often it is a one-liner that is artfully phrased and catches people’s attention. Don’t bore them with fluff, dazzle them with class!

About You — What is unique about your service or about you that the reader might want to hear?

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EXPERIENCE

All of us have some type of experience. Mortgage and Escrow are the most valuable. Real Estate experience doesn’t translate into being a better Notary, and doesn’t make you that familiar with the documents despite what you may think or claim. However, you can mention it in a one liner. Mention other experience, but don’t write paragraphs on it. Keep it short. Military and Police experience are actually very helpful if you are a signer. That way you can keep the peace and use real bullet points in your notes sections!

Mortgage Experience — List any pertinent past experience, particularly if it is in Mortgage, Escrow, or Legal. Don’t be vague about the experience either. If you say you have experience in the legal industry we’ll assume you were a janitor or secretary. If you were a legal assistant, then say so.

Unrelated Experience — You can mention what you used to do for a living. It might be impressive if you were a bank president or dictator of a small country.

Military — If you were in the military, say so. That might prove that you are careful or on time.

Police — If you were in the police, that proves you know how to deal with difficult situations and crazy people. Mention it.

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ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

The bottom of your notes section should list all of your “other” information in an easy to read format. Some people use bullet points, and others just list it clearly so it is easy to read. Do NOT put this information in a long jumbled paragraph please.

Certifications — Are you NNA certified, Notary2Pro Certified? Say so

Memberships — Are you an NNA or AAN member? What about PAN or NotaryCafe? List all memberships.

E&O Insurance — Tell us how much you have. Some people only have $15,000 while some have a million.

Equipment— Is your printer a specific brand? Is it dual or triple tray? Does it print 200 pages per minute? Say so.

Closing Phrase — Thanks for visiting my profile on 123notary. I hope to hear from you soon. But, put it in your own words so it sounds a little more unique.

Uniqueness — Uniquess really counts. People who hire Notaries have read through thousands of profiles. If yours is unique and factual, you will stand out in a very positive way as most other people’s notes are jumbled, disorganized, and have no interesting information. Additionally, many of the others ramble on and on about how they value integrity which is a useless and unverifiable claim that is a waste of the readers time. If you waste the readers time, they are statistically less likely to use you. Give them unique and factual information and win the game. Many beginners do quite well on 123notary, especially those who express themselves well.

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You might also like:

How to write a notes section if you have no experience
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4173

What goes where in your notes?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=1076

Everything you need to know about writing a great notes section
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16074

Unique Phrases from the Ninja Course
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14690

2014 Excerpts from great notes sections
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=13613

2011 Excerpts from great notes sections
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=1043

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