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January 13, 2011

Notary Public Cures Lying!

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Popular on Facebook (A little),Popular Overall — Tags: , — admin @ 7:09 am

Being economical with our finances is challenging. Being “economical” with the truth is a snap. That’s because fudging a bit is a byproduct of being all too human. But notary publics shine a light on the signed, sealed and delivered un-stretched truth. Imagine if we navigated the half-truths of life with the added assurance a notary would provide? Imagine no more.

· “It’s not you. It’s me.”

Okay… Before we break up and I draw at least some comfort from the fact I had the misfortune of choosing a partner who wasn’t good enough for me instead of vice versa, would you be willing to sign “It’s not you, it’s me” in front of Jeremy, my 123notary.com truth detector?

“Okay, it is you. Where do I sign?”

Oh well. Thanks for lying. Till a couple seconds ago, that is.

· “We’ll keep your résumé on file.”

And I’ll keep my notarized statement in which you promise to keep my résumé on file… on file.

“We’ll keep your résumé in the nearest circular file till the janitor heaves it. That you can notarize.”

Wow. I’ve been canned before, but never garbage canned.

“Your résumé didn’t mention you’d been canned before.”

You actually read my résumé? I’m honored!

“As I was folding it into a paper airplane, I couldn’t help but notice.”

· Billy “likes” this on Facebook.

And Jeremy at 123notary.com likes the fact you like this, once you let him notarize your thumb up.

“Billy likes avoiding work by killing time on Facebook. That you can notarize.”

Thanks, unfriend.

· “You look great.”

You didn’t tell me that sixty years ago when I was twenty. Why should a bunch of liver spots change things? I won’t believe you till 123notary.com makes it official.

“Don’t forget. When you were twenty, my eyesight was still good. That you can notarize.”

Okay. At least you’ll be able to feel the seal.

· “You’re a wonderful cook.”

Thanks. My dog you’re secretly passing the chicken to under the table seems to agree. Would you mind letting 123notary.com seal the deal and paper on which you praise my culinary skills?

“I was talking about the time you cooked up the whopper about how you can cook. That you can notarize.”

Well, you’ll have to come again sometime. I’m talking to the dog.

· “I’ll call you sometime.”

Yes, you will. If I can have Jeremy at 123notary.com notarize your promise to do just that.

“ ‘I’ll call you a name sometime.’ That you can notarize.”

I’ll be sure to return the call.

· “What a great audience.”

Thanks. After Jeremy from 123notary.com notarizes the cue card off of which you read that, I’ll believe you.

“No problem. Come on up, Jeremy.”

Jeremy affixes his official seal to the cue card. The card is so thick, the seal can’t make it all the way through, rendering the audience less than certifiably great. They start booing, further validating why Jeremy’s seal made less than an impression.

Thanks, you’ve been great readers. Jeremy… can you confirm that?

Andy Cowan is an award-winning writer, producer and performer, whose credits include “Cheers,” “Seinfeld” and “3rd Rock From the Sun.” He can be reached through his website, http://upanddownguys.com

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Honey, I notarized the kids (don’t try this at home)

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Movie Themes,Popular on Linked In,Popular on Twitter 2011,Ultra-Popular — Tags: , — admin @ 6:47 am


We were expecting a notary
It was about nine o’clock. We were expecting a notary at the house to do a refinance. My wife Molly had been away all week. It was an investment property and Molly did not need to be here to sign. The kids would just not go to sleep…

“Why can’t we watch TV anymore?” Joey whined.

“Because someone is coming. Someone from the bank is coming to see us…”

“Who? Do I have to be good? Do I have to stay in my room?”

Joey started chasing Milly around the house… “Joey! Milly! STOP THAT– stop running or the notary monster will notarize you!”

“What’s ‘notarize’? Who does that? What is it?” Milly squeaked.

“The notary has this big clamp. He puts it on the paper we are signing… and if you are not good, he will clamp you with it, too. And it will hurt!”

Joey jumped up and tried to touch the lamp hanging from the ceiling. At that moment, the bulb popped…

“That’s IT!!! You’re done!!!” I yelled. Just then the doorbell rang.

The Notary arrives
I opened the door. It was Mr. Eugene the notary. He was about 5′ tall, with black hair streaked with gray…and he had dark inky circles around his eyes. He carried a notary bag and walked with a limp toward the table. “I’m Mr. Eugene,” he pointed out.

“Eugene– great to meet you. We are going to whip through these documents…but we might also want to notarize these kids,” I winked. But let’s do the signing first.”

We did whip through the documents. He was a thorough notary, and seemed very intent on every detail. When we were done, I asked, “May I see you in my office here?” I led the way…

Would you wear this mask?
I shut the door so we would have a moment away from the kids. “I sort of threatened the kids; they’re really being bad this week… Would you help me ? I made this stamp out of this cardboard…and this costume…I’m going to–would you wear this mask? It will look really scary…”

“I really shouldn’t do this… ” he looked blank.

I decided then and there to be the notary monster myself.
I had cut up an inkpad (I had one from my clerical days) and made a cardboard stamp that read “notarized.” The stamp was 6″ across and looked scary…especially when I inked it up with black ink. I put on the two-headed black monster mask, adjusted it, put on the cloak, grabbed the seal… Mr. Eugene followed me out of the room. He looked worried.

“Where are you kids?” I bellowed in a strange, foreign, angry voice. The stamp said notarized backwards turned like a mirror image…

“No! NO!” yelled the kids, running away from me…” I caught them just as they were headed into the garage… and stamped each of them on their foreheads…then all over their arms and legs…

Just then the phone rang…
Just then the phone rang. It was my wife, Molly. “Honey, I notarized the kids.”

“What do you mean?” she asked. I heard the door slam. It was Mr. Eugene.

“I’ll explain later… I can explain… Don’t call the police.”

Tweets:
(1) Kid: “Do I have to be good?” Mom: “Stop running or that Notary monster will notarize you!”
(2) The stamp said “notarized” backwards turned like a mirror image. The kids were terrified.
(3) I decided then and there to be the notary monster myself.
(4) The notary has this big clamp, and if you’re not good, he’ll clamp you with it, and it will hurt!
(5) I cut up an ink pad and made a cardboard box that read “notarized” backwards like a mirror image.
(6) Frank: “Honey, I notarized the kids.”
Molly: “What do you mean?”
Frank: “I’ll explain later, don’t call the police!”

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Friends: Phoebe’s boyfriend won’t take No-tary for an answer

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Sit-Coms — Tags: , , — admin @ 6:37 am

Phoebe has a guy who won’t take no for an answer… She’s trying to break up with him, but he always thinks she’s kidding.

Phoebe: It’s like nobody takes anything I say seriously. I could say the world is ending, locusts are swarming everywhere, hot lava is gushing and…

Joey laughs.

Phoebe: What’s so funny?

Joey: The way you said ‘gushing.’ Really comical.

Rachel: (to Phoebe) Honey, people take things you say seriously.

Pheobe: Then why won’t Leon believe me when I tell him I’m dumping him?

Monica: What did you tell him?

Pheobe: I’m dumping you.

Joey laughs again.

Joey: Funny!

Monica: Maybe you should write him a Dear John letter.

Ross: Better yet. You should WRITE him a notarized Dear John letter. Then he’ll know you mean business and it’s official.

Pheobe: A notarized Dear John letter! I like it.

Chandler: If it’s notarized, and it’s official, wouldn’t it be a Dear Leon letter?

Ross: What good is a Dear Leon letter? If she’s calling Leon “dear,” he’ll never get the hint.

Pheobe: Let’s call 123Notary.com.

Notary: Do you have the document ready?

Pheobe: You mean we have to write a document?

Notary laughs.

Pheobe: Why did you just laugh?

Notary laughs again.

Pheobe: I’m hanging up now. (then) Who wants to help me write this thing?

Joey: Okay, I’ve got the beginning. “Dear John.” Whew! I’m spent.

Rachel: “Dear Leon: It’s just not working out between us. I wish you all the best. Pheobe.”

Chandler: No, don’t wish him all the best. Wish him none of the best. Better yet. Wish him all of the worst.

Monica: Chandler, you don’t want to be mean.

Chandler: It’ll have a seal on it. It’s like the notary’s being mean.

Pheobe: How’s this? ‘Dear Leon. Stop bothering me. Now. Forever more. In the next life, if there is one. And in the next life after that if there is one.”

Joey: What about the next life after that?

Pheobe: We’ll see.

LATER AT THE NOTARY…

Notary: I’m gonna need some I.D.

Pheobe: (re: driver’s license picture) Oh, don’t look at that.

Notary: I need to look at that.

Pheobe: But I look horrible in that picture. Can’t you look at this?

Notary: The tattoo of you on your thigh doesn’t constitute an official I.D.

Pheobe: (handing over driver’s license) Okay. But don’t laugh.

Notary laughs.

Pheobe: I told you not to laugh!

Notary: I’m not laughing at the picture. I’m laughing at the way you said ‘I told you not to laugh!’

Pheobe signs the journal. Leon gets the official boot. And Pheobe gets her freedom. At least until the life after the next life after the next life.

.

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Wheel of Fortune – Notary Edition

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Virtual Comedy Themes — Tags: , , — admin @ 1:01 am

WHEEL OF FORTUNE – Notary Edition

Pat: Let’s say hello to our contestants. Joe here is a notary public from Commishigan. Sounds like fascinating work, Joe.

Joe: More than hosting a glorified “Hangman” for over thirty years.

Pat: Ouch. You got me there, Joe. And hello to Marie. It says you are a notary public from Seal Beach. “Seal”. Makes sense. Okay, the puzzle is a 17 letter word. You won the coin toss, Marie. Take a spin.

Marie: Big money! Big money!

Pat: Well, if you’re looking for big money, you picked the wrong profession.

Marie: Cheap shot, Pat.

Pat: Speaking of cheap – $200.

Marie: Any S’s?

Pat: Three S’s. Go again.

Marie: Big money! Big money!

Pat: $450

Marie: X?

Pat: No X’s. Unless you’re signing a document that way. Joe, your turn.

Joe: Big money! Big money!

Pat: $1000!

Joe: Any R’s?

Pat: Two R’s.

Joe: I’d like to solve the puzzle, Pat. I mean the one besides how it is Vanna White still has a job.

Pat: That puzzle we’ll never solve.

Joe: “Errors and Emission”.

Pat: Speaking of errors, you just made one, yourself there, Joe. Marie, a break for you.

Marie: I’d like to buy a vowel, Pat. Are there any O’s?

Pat: Three O’s.

Marie: I’d like to solve the puzzle. “Errors and Omission”.

Pat: As in the insurance policy that protects notaries liable for honest mistakes. Joe, too bad you didn’t have it when you made your honest mistake a minute ago.

Joe: Good thing a credible witness didn’t see me make it. Unless you call Vanna “credible.”

Pat: If it involves signaling things with her hands, I do. Especially the profane gesture she’s using right now!

.

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January 12, 2011

JJ Draws a Notary Seal on Good Times

Filed under: Sit-Coms — Tags: , , — admin @ 11:32 pm

JJ: Check out my new Notary Seal

FLORIDA: JJ, you aren’t a Notary

JJ: No, this is for an art project

JAMES: That doesn’t look like a Notary Seal, that looks like an explosion at a paint factory.

JJ: For your information, this is a highly desireable designer Notary Seal. We are going to market it to the most successful Notaries in Maryland and DC, if I can get out of this neighborhood without bumping into Charlie.

FLORIDA: Now, who’s Charlie?

JJ: He’s a guy who says I owe him $10

FLORIDA: Now, why would he say a thing like that?

JJ: Because I owe him $10

JAMES: Boy, how many times have I told you not to go around borrowing money from people. It’s better just to not have what you want than to have some bully chasing you around town threatening to beat you up all the time.

JJ: Oh no, I think you misunderstood. He isn’t threatening to beat me up.

FLORIDA: You see? There isn’t a problem after all.

JJ: Well at least not a problem for me. He didn’t threaten to beat me up. He threatened to be my family up.

JAMES: What? You come here now. You are going to find a way to pay that boy back if it kills you. Or I’ll kill you! You hear? I don’t want anything happening to Thelma or your mom.

JJ: Neither do I, but I think he is more interested… in you!

JAMES: In me? Is this guy crazy?

JJ: It depends how you define crazy. But, worry not. Check out the impression of this notary seal. Each word is a different color. Yellow, blue, red, green, with a black perimeter… I bet I could sell these on the street for a dollar each. They’re beautiful.

THELMA: And illegal. You can’t impersonate a Notary and give away copies of their seal impression. Everybody knows that.

JJ: What is this now, have you graduated from the academy of Notary Science now?

THELMA: I took a course. I know something.

JJ: Well worry not, because the notary seal is 200x as big as the real one, and is obviously a work of art. Besides, the Notary’s name is George Washington.

FLORIDA: Why not Abraham Lincoln. If it weren’t for him, you’d be drawing pictures of cotton on your day off.

JAMES: That’s a good point. Listen JJ, you find a way to get that $10 back to Charlie in the next 48 hours, or else you’ll be hearing from me, and my belt strap.

FLORIDA: Now, James.

JAMES: Don’t argue with me.

(the next day)

JJ: Uh huh… Excuse me. But, there is something I need to tell you all.

FLORIDA: We’re listening. I hope this is good. Are our lives in danger?

JJ: Not exactly. It seems that there was a terrible accident. I read about it in the paper, and heard about it from some friends down the block. Our friend Charlie was the victim in a hit and run accident. It seems that the perpatrator was a mobile notary who was mad because he couldn’t find a parking spot for more than an hour. He started driving irratically, and ran over Charlie.

THELMA: Does this mean you don’t have to pay back Charlie the $10?

JJ: I guess not. But, I have only one regret.

JAMES: What’s that? This better be good.

JJ: I thoroughly regret that I was not given an opportunity to sell the mobile notary one of my pictures of a notary seal impression before he was arrested.

THELMA: Well, there will be other notaries. Just you wait!

.

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Why keep a journal? Don’t wait until you get a call from the FBI.

Filed under: Journals — Tags: , , , , — admin @ 11:31 pm

I have the worst time talking to Notaries in NJ, NY and Florida. They have the worst attitude. The minute ask them a journal quesiton the answer is usually — my state doesn’t require me to keep a journal. I have heard this so many times I just want to throw them off my site just for saying that. I am so upset, that I have decided to have formal standards on 123notary for what we require in our jurisdiction online. Journals will be one of the requirements.

When you are:
Investigated for fraud that you notarized
In court or
Need to look up a former transaction for some reason

Your journal is your only recourse. If you don’t keep a journal, you will not be able to answer to investigators. A journal thumbprint is sometimes the only way the FBI can catch an identity thief. If you don’t keep one because your state doesn’t require it, then you are empowering identity thiefs. Florida’s FAQ page states that they don’t want Notaries to require a thumbprint. That is like asking parents not to require their children to wear a seatbelt. When your child comes home with a fractured jaw, you will change the way you look at this “requirement.”

I was investigated three times.

#1. An investigator suspected an elderly couple of being ripped off. I told him I found the transaction in my journal and had a thumbprint. He said, “Investigation over.” I was off the hook because I kept good records.

#2 A routine inquiry with a journal entry copied and sent to the inuirer.

#3. Someone copied my seal using a xerox machine and pretended to be me. I looked in my journal and found the exact day when the crime was committed. I did a few other jobs that day, but not the job in question. The handwriting on the acknowledgment didn’t match mine either and they did not do the cross outs or use an embosser. Having a journal saved my neck. How can you not keep one?

Another story was that a shady guy wanted to be notarized by me. I told him that I required a thumbprint. The guy protested but I stood my ground. He declined and found another Notary. I detered a potential fraud from happening and it was easy. NNA sells thumbprinters for about $16. Buy a few. It is your best protection.

NNA teaches proper journal filling technique. Learn from them. They teach Notary knowledge better than anyone else.

.

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Notary Jail

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular on Facebook (very) — Tags: — admin @ 12:00 pm

WARDEN: Welcome to Notary Jail — Don’t drop the embosser!
It’s time for mug shots. Turn to the right and say “scilicit” — that’s a notary term. You would know that if you read your Notary handbook. And by the way, selling your notary seal on eBay, was it really worth it?

NOTARY: Hey, I got paid $800 for it. I was in a pinch and needed the money.

WARDEN: Well you won’t have to worry about being behind on rent here!

I think that I am the first person to come up with this concept. Notary jail. Where Notaries go when they’ve been bad. But, most Notaries have been bad, they just didn’t get caught because their secretary of state’s don’t bother to enforce a single law. What is the point of having laws if you don’t enforce them?

Oath Omissions
If you forget to administer an Oath you should be sent to Notary jail and get booked. The first thing they will do is thumbprint you in their journal. Then, they will ask you if you take journal thumbprints. If you say, “My state doesn’t require that.” Then they will put you in solitary confinement. After all, an innocent person could be scammed out of everything they own and the culprit could run free simply because you didn’t take a thumbprint.

ID-ing
If you didn’t ID someone correctly, then a cell in the insane ward would be in order. Since you let John Smith sign as John W Smith, you will also not mind being around five people who are sure that they are Abraham Lincoln.

Loose Certificates
And then there are the people who don’t fill in certificates properly or send loose certificates in the mail. Tisk tisk. The staff at Notary jail will goof on your jail paperwork if you do that and you’ll be in for a long time.

Jail Food?
Oh, and the food at Notary jail? Embossed flat bread sandwiches. You get that nice raised seal embossed pattern on every bite. Then they have a breakfast cereal called frosted mini-seals. Oh, and one more thing. They have soap shaped like a Notary seal. But, don’t drop the soap (or don’t drop the seal.)

Entertainment at Notary jail involves watching television documentaries on the notary profession and NNA how to materials. When they run out of sleeping pills, they have written Notary materials for you to study. The yard outside is shaped like a giant notary seal. You get an hour of outside time per day.

Notary Questions
And if they ask Notary questions in Notary jail, don’t talk back to the guards like you normally do to Jeremy. Just answer questions the way they were asked and you might get time off for good behavior.

Conclusion
In real life, the Notaries who end up in jail are those who committed fraud involving real property. Trying to steal someone’s property and put it in someone else’s name using your Notary commission is the worst crime you can commit.

Then there are the cases where fraud happens that is not the Notary’s fault. Perhaps if the Notary had been more careful filling out the certificates or journal entries it would be easier to prove what happened. But, in such cases, the notary ends up in court, not jail.

If you do end up in Notary jail, you might bump into a few of your Mortgage Broker clients. On the other hand, they have their own jail — Mortgage Jail.

.

Can a Notary go to jail for Notary fraud?
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Putting jails and hospitals into your notes section
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Go to jail but DO collect $100
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Find a notary who goes to Twin Towers Jail and other Los Angeles Prisons
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Jeremy’s Birthday Party

Filed under: Humorous Posts — Tags: — admin @ 7:39 am

[Please refer to “Jeremy Doesn’t Want to be 44” before reading this one.]
Disclaimer: This blog is based on rough plans that haven’t happened yet. We are just using our imaginations here. But, we really are planning to go wine tasting in Ojai!

Thank God I wasn’t born on Feb 29… or else I’d be 11 instead of 44.

Things go well at the wine tasting in Ojai. Everyone meets someone pleasant and begins to feel that there are new possibilities in life. The wine is good. Sylvia says she’ll meet up with us back in L.A….where we are going to the Korean restaurant The Prince for dinner. Will she really come to L.A.? Does she like me that much?

Aline, Jen, Shelly and I arrive at The Prince. There seemed to be several birthday parties taking place in the room.

The guy at the table next to us is an acupuncturist…he’s having an acupuncture birthday cake that looks like an arm with tall thin silver candles like acupuncture needles…long skinny needles…

There is another party having a cake in the shape of Korea. They are cutting the cake. One person is saying “I want Pusan…” His sister is saying “I want North Korea…I want to eat them…” Another guy says, “I’m a Seoul brother… I’m from Seoul…Give me the piece that has Seoul in it!”

The menu is fantastic. They have their signature dish, deep-fried Korean chicken…and also sweet potato fries…deep-fried seaweed…and several types of Korean pancakes (large and thick, like egg foo young) with seafood, meat, or vegetables. Aline and I order dishes of raw meat we can grill… and a lot of root vegetables… Jen orders Korean pork belly wrapped in a leaf with other vegetables. It makes sort of a little taco. Shelly waits to try samples they bring to the table. I order a special plate with a little bit of everything. After all, it’s my birthday.

My friend Myung comes in with two people I have never seen before. “How are you? What are you doing here?” Myung introduces me to his sister Chae and his friend Gun-woo.

“Would you like to join us? It’s my birthday. I didn’t know you’d be in town. Come join us,” I offer.

“Sure! My friend Gun-woo is a software developer who just moved here. He will stay with us for a while. Are you still looking for help with your website?”

“A developer! Gun-woo, I am looking for a developer!” We talk shop for a few minutes. They have brought a baduk board with them, and we play. Gun-woo hears Aline say that I am 44…and smiles: “I’m also 44!” The evening is going well already. Chae hits it off with Jen and Aline and Shelly. They all talk about me while I am playing baduk with the guys.

After that, a birthday cake shaped like a giant notary stamp arrives…leaking dark chocolate black ink. “I want the part that says notary public,” I say. “I want the handle,” Shelly says. Everyone claims a special piece. It’s served on plates with Jurat wording “Subscribed and sworn before me…”
“Save some for Sylvia, I say optimistically. Everyone looks at each other doubtfully. Just then, Sylvia opens the door and walks into the room. The girls are all surprised she made it. I am too happy for words.

“I had a hard time with my GPS but once it got used to L.A., The Prince was easy to find,” she says, smiling. I am so happy. Sylvia looks lovely. “What are we having?” she asks. “Well, you could have the Korean tacos… Dahkgogee. Dahk is chicken. In Korean, the word for chicken is pronounced Dahk. But, what is the word for Duck — Chicken? Probably not! Or you can have bulgogee…which is meat. Beef or pork.” She orders some quick tacos and has some of the notary cake I saved for her. She just smiles at me.

I count the number of people in the room (a habit of mine)…and it is 44. I look at the bill for the glass of soju and it is $6.44… everywhere is 44…
Myung says, “You should have gone soju tasting instead of wine tasting…” We laugh. Gun-woo likes Aline and is talking to her non-stop.

“We have a surprise for you,” says Jen. Jen and Aline are smiling impishly. Suddenly, someone is behind me– and my face is forced down into a pie on the table… Everyone is laughing. They take pictures. I grab a few napkins as they are laughing hysterically. I finish cleaning up in the rest room…

“Let’s go dancing… ” I say. Sylvia looks right at me, right into me, as if she has known me all her life. Jen and Aline say, “You haven’t been dancing for years!” They are surprised but happy.

Sylvia and Gun-woo are 44 too, and they are the coolest people I can think of. Maybe being 44 is not so bad. In fact, you know what? I have decided that I like being 44. I want to be 44 forever!

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Notary Respect

Filed under: Ken Edelstein — Tags: , — admin @ 1:30 am

Notary Respect
“When you arrive at the building, please use the service entrance.” That was the closing sentence from a client for an assignment in a midtown Manhattan office building. I called, and made it quite clear that was not the way I would proceed. “I do not use the back door; I am a commissioned office of the State Department of the State of New York on official business. I do not use the messenger or pizza delivery entrance. If you will kindly confirm to me that a pass will be waiting for me in the main lobby, I will be able to confirm your appointment”.

The above was yesterday. The client did assure me that a building security pass, at the normal entrance would be waiting for me. It was. Even though I carried a large bag with my fingerprinting supplies, I was directed to the elevator without incident. The assignment also included notarization; though both require my standing as a notary to establish ID.

This evening I had a title company call with a refinance. The location was nearby and they readily agreed to my fee. The assignment was for the next day, a Saturday. “The borrower has an early flight and would like you on location at 6AM.” Gulp, that will cost you an additional $50 as it would require me to wake at 5AM. “Why – $50 more, it’s not that you are likely to have some other conflicting appointment scheduled.” My only reply, censoring what I wanted to say was “Thank You for calling, find someone else”. Clearly my loss of sleep had no value to them, but it certainly does to me.

Chances are you are polite and respectful to callers and clients. However, not all callers are respectful to us. I found the position taken by the 6AM job caller disrespectful. To me that warrants an abrupt, but polite – end to the conversation. Sometimes our clients can be a bit unreasonable. At the door I heard large dogs growling and snarling. I like dogs, and usually have no concern about them. But, at this location they seemed very aggressive, not the “I like you” kind, that want some attention. I asked that the dogs be placed in a different room prior to entering. “My dogs are always free, enter or not; it’s your choice.” Away I went.

Do you have dignity? It’s rather a shock to me to have to ask the question. Of course you do, but do you demand respect both for yourself and your office as a notary? I have been asked, on a signing to literally “sit in the corner till you are required”. I’m not furniture. “He’s “just” the notary”, superfluous condescending word “just”. More accurately: He is the Notary. Even if you have a low self image, project the status and honor (yes honor) of your profession and office.

I’m not talking about being pompous and acting superior. Folks at the signing table are not expected to stand when you enter the room. You are an integral and necessary part of our legal system. A document can become evidence in court – because of your certification. We are the front line troops defending against and eliminating much fraud. There is a long and honorable history behind our roles as notaries. Our impartiality and objectivity define us.

Respect, just like trust; has to be earned. One way we earn trust is being sworn under oath to uphold our state’s laws. Respect is a bit more difficult to earn. Snide and demeaning comments as: “just a notary” must be immediately and politely voiced objections. When you dress, act, and practice your profession honorably; the respect you deserve will generally be forthcoming.

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Demographics in the Mobile Notary Business

Filed under: General Stories,Popular Overall — Tags: , , — admin @ 1:17 am

There are about 30,000 mobile notaries in the United States. About a quarter of them are currently online on 123notary.com. The number is hard to track, but it is a mere fraction of the 4 million plus Notaries in the United States. But, who are these Notaries demographically? The facts to not match national trends for entrepreneurship.

US Statistics
Statistically in the United States, African Americans and Hispanics are less likely to own their own business than Whites or Asian-Americans. I previously felt that Asians were the most entrepreneurial race in the United States as so many North Indians and Koreans own small shops, gas stations, restaurants, and other types of businesses. After reading more statistics I was shocked to learn that whites have the highest rate of business ownership. I know very few whites who enjoy business. In fact, most of the whites I grew up to had an allergic reaction to even the thought of business as it was a dirty word.

African-American Notary Statistics
In the Notary world, the stats work the other way. African-Americans are statistically much more likely (per capita) to become a mobile notary. 12.6% of Americans are African-American, yet roughly 20% of mobile Notaries are African American. African-Americans are more likely to excel in jobs that require clerical skills in government jobs such as the IRS, County Offices, DMV, etc. However, African-Americans are about half as likely to start their own business. Since a mobile notary business requires clerical as well as entrepreneurial skills, it is an interesting case study as blacks are over-represented in clerical jobs and under-represented as entrepreneurs statistially. African Americans are roughly twice as likely to start a Mobile Notary business than whites are.

What about Asians and Hispanics
Since Mobile Notary work requires a lot of communication and reading skills, only very assimilated Asians and Hispanics succeed in this line of work as newer immigrants are often weak in reading comphrehension and verbal English skills. Asians and Hispanics make up roughly 21% of the American population, yet constitute only about 10% of Mobile Notaries.

Women in the Notary Biz
As Mobile Notaries are often Realtors, or former Mortgage Brokers, it is not surprising that there are many women in the business. Women constitute about 60% of Mobile Notaries which makes sense since women also represent more than half of all Realtors.

Summary
So, the group most likely (per-capita) to be a Mobile Notary would be African-American women, and then the next most likley group would be White women. However, these statistics are subject to change as it is becoming fashionable in the Tajikistani-American community to be Mobile Notaries. It is the “in thing” to do these days in their community along with having a kabob take-out restaurant.

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