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January 2, 2011

Fingerprinting 101 – What’s Worth Knowing

Fingerprinting 101 – What’s worth Knowing
First, it’s necessary to clear up a bit of nomenclature confusion. Fingerprinting is the recording of the pattern of loops and whorls, typically on a standard FD258 (civilian, non-criminal) card. This is accomplished with either ink or a scanning device. “Fingerprint Kits” on Ebay are most often fingerprint “lifting” kits, essentially very fine powders that are applied to the fingerprint and a “copy” taken (lifted with tape, etc.), physically or they can be photographed.

I choose to not do fingerprint lifting as it would require me to prepare a written report and probably be called to testify in a courtroom. Yecch. Also, such activity is usually done by a Police professional – trained for the task. However, I do a lot of fingerprinting. New York State does not offer a fingerprint license; if they did I would have it. My authority to establish positive ID on the cards comes from being a Notary. I fingerprint people for FBI background checks, various licenses, and many immigration related purposes. There is no “oath” nor is there a need to be able to converse with the applicant, however, a translator is often helpful.

Back to the nuts and bolts. First, there is the “Live Scan” machine. Essentially a scanner hooked to a PC that communicates to a specific destination. All this must be prearranged and “type accepted” by the receiving party. A Live Scan setup is target centric and is generally not able to transmit (over telephone lines) to multiple destinations. This makes sense when many applicants go to a single place, which transmits to a single place. The more common and flexible fingerprinting is done with ink. Ink can be either embedded into a ceramic pad, similar to a common ink pad; or spread on a glass or metal plate with a roller. The latter is more time consuming but gives greater control to the fingerprint technician.

The FD258 fingerprint card is a bit narrower than a standard 8.5 inch wide sheet of paper. Of course the card holders are designed for the card to fit with no wiggle. Therefore a downloaded and printed image of the FD258 card does not fit a standard cardholder. It is possible to fold the edges and create an imprecise fit of the sheet of paper card image. Unfortunately, most computer paper is really not suitable for accepting standard fingerprint ink properly. Bottom line: printouts of the fingerprint card image should be avoided. Much better is to maintain a stock of FD258s. A common variation is the FINRA (used by the brokerage industry) cards. They are the exact same FD258 with the addition of preprinted barcoding, required by FINRA.

Proper finger preparation is essential. I have seen fingerprinting done without even having the applicant wash their hands! Access to hand washing facilities (soap and very warm water) is essential. Once the hands are washed the applicant should touch nothing, not even their ringing cell phone (I have had mixed results with this request!). Next, a mild solution of pepper extract (an “irritant”) is applied to the fingertips to raise the “friction ridges”. The friction ridges are ever so slightly “higher” than the underlying finger flesh; it is the ridges that form the fingerprint. This solution requires a second hand washing to remove prior to applying the ink.

It is critical that the minimum amount of ink be applied, lest the ink pass the friction ridges and collect in the “valleys” between the ridges. Perhaps the most common mistake is over inking. Using the traditional ink and roller allows greater control of ink application compared to the ceramic pad. If the layer of ink on the glass or metal plate is exactly correct; it’s impossible to transfer too much to the fingertip. With the ceramic pad the transfer of ink is directly proportional to the pressure exerted, and the risk of over inking is greater.
There is also a psychological aspect to fingerprinting. Many clients have two issues. Some don’t like to be physically manipulated; a necessity to take the fingerprint impressions. Always use a blank sheet of paper to check how the ink layer reacts to their fingertips. The test prints are good for explaining the procedure on a spare card while demonstrating the procedure. Emphasize that you must be in control and not be “assisted” – your subject must not press down or actively turn their finger. You must, when completed; check their ID and match to the name they printed and signed on the card. Lastly, you sign and date each card; or, if it does not meet the standard of clarity and completeness – break out another card and start over; it must be perfect.

Tweets:
(1) is the recording of the pattern of loops and whorls, typically on a standard FD258 (civilian, non-criminal) card
(2) Proper finger preparation is essential for fingerprinting. Wash each finger one by one!

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How to choose a malpractice lawyer?

Filed under: Other Guest Bloggers — admin @ 8:33 am

How to choose a malpractice lawyer?
Ever wondered that you could run into danger even after hiring a lawyer? Yes, this does happen. Sometimes lawyers make mistakes which have serious repercussions for the clients. This scenario is acknowledged as malpractice. In medical terminologies, malpractice is defined as an issue that is caused by a doctor’s or medical staff’s negligence to the patient. It could be a simple mistake causing great damage to somebody’s brain and even death.

What is legal malpractice?
Legal malpractice is defined as the damage caused to the client in the pursuit of a lawyer lending his/her legal services. A very basic example of a mistake is a lawyer missing out on filing papers in the court. However, malpractice is not just limited to simple mistakes; it could also be inclusive of the breach of contract by the lawyer who has been appointed by the client.

How to choose a malpractice lawyer?
Choosing a malpractice lawyer becomes imperative when major damage has been done. However, it is better if you choose one who has sound reviews. Let’s go through some of the simple steps to locate a malpractice lawyer:

Consult your current lawyer
If you are already working with a lawyer on a different case then always ask for a referral. People who are in this profession will be better in guiding you through the process. In case a friend or a family member has pursued a malpractice case in the past then that’s the best hand for you.

Consult legal sites
Go for registered and verified sites. Search engines do help but can also make one run in trouble in case a fraudulent website is consulted. You can consult Seattle malpractice lawyers for top-notch services in this segment. In case you are skeptical about a website then immediately take it down from your list.

Don’t forget to contact the legal bar association of the state
Instead of hovering over the entire country, look for the legal association in your state. Just as contacting the head office is better than contacting a franchise, registering a call in the official department is wiser instead of contacting many firms in the business. The state department will be able to tell you about the people who are legally registered to help you.

Always look at the portfolio
Don’t make a choice imminently. You already wasted a lot of money in bagging a faulty lawyer in the past. This time it’s important that you go through the work history of the prospective lawyer or the firm. Don’t overlook customer reviews if you’re going through the official website.

Interview the prospective lawyer
You can easily judge your lawyer by having a one to one conversation with him. You can easily judge if he’s here to help or just to looking forward to shredding lots of money from your pocket. Talk about your case and ask the person for previous work experience.

Make an Agreement with the lawyer
Everything written in the note will always be a good reference. Don’t commit anything verbally. You don’t know how time will take to you forward. It is better to write everything down in the agreement. Don’t keep any bit of skepticism in mind and ask everything.

Sign the contract
Be confident and move on. Sign the contract after reading everything that has been typed. Make sure that fee and everything have been jotted down with much clarity.

Lastly!
We hope that you get a suitable malpractice lawyer this time. The only thing is that some wise decisions need to be made in terms of getting back with the legal procedures.

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Commission Impossible…

COMMISSION IMPOSSIBLE

Your commission, should you choose to accept it, is for an impossible mission that few notaries’ businesses live to tell about… The ones not worth commissioning…

Look out! The signer isn’t present! Right behind you! That document is incomplete! Not a good sign – The signer is the notary’s spouse! Watch out! The signer can’t produce acceptable identification! If their driver’s license picture is Waldo of “Where’s Waldo” fame, beware! Whether you can spot him in a crowd, or not, Waldo doesn’t really exist! Danger! The notary has a financial interest in the transaction! In that case, your interest must be in finding a commission impossible!

Oh no! The document doesn’t have a prepared notary certificate! Prepare yourself for disaster or no commission, whichever comes first! Danger! The notary thinks the signer is being coerced to sign! Coerce yourself out of that situation! What’s that, you say? The notary suspects the transaction is fake or deceptive? That’s as conducive to landing a commission as landing a punch in a fake wrestling match!

Look out!! The signer can’t pay the notary’s fee? Commission impossible! The signer’s a minor? Commission impossible! The signer seems drunk? Face this sober fact – Commission impossible!!

Don’t let the signer intimidate you into notarizing when the law prohibits it! If you use good judgment, you’ll get the commission the right way. Oh, and since this is “Commission Impossible,” at the end you’ll also get the girl, even if you’re not Tom Cruise. If you’re a female notary, you’ll get the guy. Even if he’s not Tom Cruise!

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Deceptive fax backs: the good old bait and switch tactic
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14040

Deceptive identities — companies that change their names
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=1090

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National Loan Closers

Here is what Notaries are saying about this outfit.
http://www.123notary.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=3755

Ollie
“Like many of you, our business relationship with NLC started out being
amicable.
However, we just learned that they pay every 61 days–at least for us.
This is called floating; which means instead of your income producing for you (like interest earned), it is producing for them.

We are proponents of receiving our fee the same disbursement day as the buyers and sellers.
The industry normal currently is ‘net 30’. What should be the norm is interest earned on the fee due from the day of disbursement on all completed assignments.
What we will do for companies like NLC is accept assignments by PAYPAL!”

Shannon
“I recently received then declined a signing. When prompted to “select” my fee, I was unable to find a fee greater than $85.00. While certainly there are assignments that might be done for that price (or even less), a loan signing is typically never less than $100 and with printing and other requirements much more likely to be closer to $200.

If indeed your maximum price per signing is $85.00, then I would ask that you remove me from your mailing list and system altogether. Even as a novice Notary back in 2003, Loan Signings in Orange County paid $150. [either way, gas is $4/gal]

I own and operate three (3) Mobile Notary businesses and personally service six Southern California counties. I carry $1MM in Errors and Omissions insurance that blankets my businesses and am NNA and DOJ background Checked and a Certified Notary Signing Agent. I have personally signed over 13,000 loans since 2003. I am truly an expert at what I do. I’d love to hear from you again when your pricing better reflects the value of my services.”

Diana
“BEWARE OF NLC!!!! They are full of excuses when it comes time to pay!! It has been over 60 days for 2 jobs I done for them and No payment.. But I keep getting their “pay policy” emailed!! Of course, it says I should have been paid..LOL.. I guess their not looking at the dates!. I for 1 will Never work for them again.. They are on My Black List!! Good Luck everyone!!”

ldelrey
“I have been with NLC since last year always paid on time, however, this year has been a night mare, I’m still waiting for payment from Jun 8, 11, 12, 2012.I have send the invoice via email 20 times and also call. We are sending checks out by the end of the week…I have not done any closing for July-Thank God…”

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New Signing Companies
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=new

Signing Company Gossip Feed
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Some of you people have a few screws loose.

When I ask people questions to test their competency, it is remarkable how many people have screws loose.

Repeating
When I talk to my psychic, I talk to him for an hour every week or two. I do not ask him to repeat anything in an hour. When I talk to Carmen or Adine on the phone, I never have to have them repeat anything. It is remarkable how many of my clients have me repeat myself multiple times in a very short conversation. Do they not understand the confusing technical language I am using with terms like, “Venue, Notarial Act, Acknowledgment, Journal or Affiant?” If you don’t know Notary language, time to look up some terms in our glossary. That is your jour to know!

Scrambling
Normally when I ask people, “If you have TWO people each of whom is signing THREE notarized documents, how many journal entries should you fill out.” The Notary repeats back to me, “Okay, so you have THREE people each signing how many documents?” First of all, it is two people, how can you scramble that? Additionally, they are not signing three documents, they are signing three NOTARIZED documents. If the documents are not notarized documents, you don’t need to fill out any journal entries.

That would lead me to a great trick question — if you have two signers signing three documents, how many journal entries would you need to create? None! Because the documents were not designated to be notarized!

Changing the Scenario
When I ask, “If the ID says John Smith, but the name on the signature of the documetn says, John W Smith, without changing the scenario, can you notarize the signature?” Most people immediately say they would ask for another ID. But, asking for another ID is what I told you specifically not to do, namely, changing the scenario. I am trying to test your skills on saying yes or no to questions with limited parameters, not your skill at changing the question to a completely different quesiton that you prefer to answer. Answer questions as asked or you lose points. It is not rocket science — and the answer is NO. You are a Notary, yet the word you have the most trouble saying is, “NO.”

Talking endlessly
When I ask quick questions I have thousands of people to ask. If you talk endlessly and I have to ask you to stop talking, that is a huge headache for me. Just answer questions quickly without rambling and we can finish our quiz quickly.

Sluggish
Some people take forever to think of answer to questions. The most relentless question is when I ask people which Notary Acts are legal in their state. Most people have to think for a long time. You do Acknowledgements, Jurats and Oaths daily, why is it like rocket science for you to open your mouth and spit it out? Do you not know that those are considered official notarial acts in your state or in most states? A few states don’t have an official Jurat, but they have other acts similar to it such as Verification under Oath or Affidavits or Sworn Statements.

In short, the behavior of Notaries always seems somewhat mentally impaired. Less than 10% of Notaries on 123notary can just answer simple questions without asking me to repeat, scrambling information, changing the scenario, giving round about answers, rambling endlessly or taking a lot of my time. I just want to test your competency. I don’t have all day for nonsense. Try to discipline yourself to answer questions the way they were asked because the business world doesn’t have the patience for this type of nonsense. It is purely unprofessional.

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Introducing the 2019 Notaries!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=21147

Notarization for an exorcism
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20948

The Notary Asylum
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17464

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Additions to policies regarding listings, certification and elite

Filed under: Advertising,Popular on Linked In — admin @ 12:37 am

Here are some new official policies for being listed and having various certifications. Please note that in addition to testing Notaries on general competency in the areas we test them in, we also keep score for general communication skills. Notaries who exhibit various forms of incompetency, bad attitudes, or listening comprehension issues will be written up in our notes which are private and not accessable to the public in any way shape or form.

(1) Requirements for being listed on 123notary.com.
In addition to being a current Notary Public, you must exhibit a certain level of competency to us at 123notary by means of a phone quiz. We require a minimum of 70% passing to ensure being willing to list you on the basis of competency. For those that score less than 70%, we might make exceptions if they are in an area with not so many other Notaries, or not so many other Notaries who passed our test. Issues that we expect Notaries to be competent in include:

Identification, Journals, Notary Acts, Oaths, Certificates, and Seals.

(2) Requirements for getting or keeping certification from 123notary.com.
Our previous rule was that if you were certified by 123notary, that the certification fee was a one time fee only. As of October 2017, we will require Notaries to recertify every (2) years. This will be at a small cost to those who purchased certification after Oct, 2017 and at no cost for those who initially got certified before that date.

All certified Notaries will be quizzed by phone no more than once per calendar year. The quiz for certified Notaries will include questions about:

(a) General Notary Knowledge: Identification, Journals, Notary Acts, Oaths, Certificates, and Seals.
(b) Handling situations before, at, or after loan signings.
(c) General knowledge of basic loan documents which normally include questions about FAQ’s borrowers have and what information is in which document.

(3) Requirements for keeping our Elite certification on 123notary.com.

All elite certified notaries on 123notary will be quizzed by phone no more than once per calendar year for quality standards. The quiz will include.

(a) General Notary Knowledge: Identification, Journals, Notary Acts, Oaths, Certificates, and Seals.
(b) Handling situations before, at, or after loan signings.
(c) General knowledge of basic loan documents which normally include questions about FAQ’s borrowers have and what information is in which document.
(d) Advanced Notary knowledge such as advanced vocabulary, Apostilles, less common documents, and generally harder questions.

Grading for elite certification will be at a higher standard than for the regular certified Notaries although we do not have a set standard for a passing percentage due to the fact that the difficulty of questions can vary from test to test.

(4) It is possible we might have a Platinum certification with an even higher standard in the future. However, during 2017 we will focus on maintaining set standards for the regular certification and elite. Please keep reading the blog to see if Platinum or Platinum Gray is mentioned.

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All about 123notary
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18897

Does 123notary have the authority to quiz people?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19469

The history of 123notary
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=17458

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January 1, 2011

Thank You – Excuse Me – I’m Sorry

Filed under: Etiquette,Ken Edelstein — Tags: , — admin @ 11:36 pm

Thank You, Excuse Me, I’m Sorry
Now that’s an odd title! But the three are actually related, much more so than you might expect. The first thing that comes to my mind is the term (that applies to each) underused. The second term that seems to apply is overused. Paradox? Of course. My regular readers expect no less from me, and this blog will not disappoint you.

GENUINE Thank You(s) are way too few and far between. When you are leaving the borrower’s home do you take a moment to say “Thank You for your time”? Do you send a Thank You when receiving an assignment? Think back when you were a little kid. Mom often said “What do you say” to prompt you for giving a Thank You to the person who did a kindness to you. Mom stressed that thousands of times to drill it into your little brain so it would become a lifelong part of you. When did you start to forget that Mother Knows Best?

Thank You is just the first two words. They should be followed by “for” and a description of what action the recipient has taken to earn your gratitude. Thank You for your nice compliment about my shoes, is an example. A Thank You without details seems robotic and a bit hollow; kinda like an autonomic mindless reflect statement. Make your Thank You genuine and actually talk with substance and conviction; let them know your words are relevant and genuine.

Excuse Me has some very interesting uses. Recently, it seems to be spoken after deliberate bad manners; to absolve the transgressor for their misbehavior. It does not accomplish that objective. I know one person, basically a nice guy, who has a most annoying habit. He constantly interrupts when I am speaking to him. His interruptions are always prefaced with a loud “EXCUSE ME” followed by whatever he wanted to say. He seems to feel that a formerly used for politeness term can be invoked to permit bad manners. A real Excuse Me is for, typically, an accidental transgression. You are in the supermarket reaching for the last can of tuna that has been marked down. Just as your hand is about to grasp the can, the shopper behind you, moving a bit quicker; snatches the tuna for their shopping cart. You are momentarily stunned by their action. They say “Excuse Me”, Jeremy would not publish what I would say to that shopper.

Lastly, I come to “I’m Sorry”. So very inappropriately used, especially by business entities. As I write this I am waiting for an item to be delivered that should have been here yesterday. I ordered the item at 10AM and paid for 2 day FedEx delivery. I was assured it would be shipped the day ordered and arrive in 2 shipping days. Well, today is the third day and I checked and found the item is “Out for Delivery”, a day late. When it did not arrive yesterday I called the vendor and complained that I paid for 2 day delivery and did not receive the service that was promised and paid for.

“I’m Sorry” about the delay, we did not ship till the day after you placed the order. You did order in plenty of time for us to make the shipment that day, again we are sorry about the situation. My response was direct and probably a bit on the aggressive side: I’m sorry and other apologies are for small children when they deviate from proper behavior. Your business is not operated by small children. Businesses make “restitution” for their errors and do not “wash them away” with a blithe verbal apology.Kindly refund the price of the shipping. There is a 2 day FedEx rate and a 3 day FedEx rate. Subtract the smaller from the larger and refund it to me. I’m sorry does not “cut it” in commercial transactions. I was fortunate to speak to a senior manager who appreciated the logic of my argument and issued a partial refund.

As a http://newyorkmobilenotarypublic.com I have ample opportunity to say Thank You, Excuse Me, and I’m Sorry. I thank persons who extend me a courtesy, such as selecting me for a notary assignment. I ask that the homeowner excuse me when I forgot to wipe my shoes on their entrance rug prior to entering their spotless house. I have made I’m Sorry but I will be a few minutes late calls; when stuck behind a fire truck on the way to a signing. They are magic terms, when used appropriately. It is the intentional misuse of these phrases, as a perceived exoneration for anti-social behavior that leaves a very bad impression. Sincerity, politeness and honesty will never go out of style.

Tweets
(1) I’m sorry and other apologies are for small children when they deviate from proper behavior. Your business is not operated by small children.
(2) Businesses make “restitution” for their errors and do not “wash them away” with a blithe verbal apology.

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Ann Handley changed my life by introducing the five food groups of blogging

Filed under: Social Media — Tags: , , , , , — admin @ 10:32 pm

Something was missing in my blog
I have been blogging for years. But, I realized that my blog wasn’t that organized. Sure, I had lots of cool categories, and yes, there was useful content — but, something was missing. I just couldn’t figure out what was missing until I read Ann Handley’s (marketingprofs) blog about the five food groups of blogging.

They make their blog “comfy”
First of all, Marketing Profs does such a good job of making their blog writing style easy to read, informative, and also they make you feel comfortable reading their blogs. They always seem to integrate coffee, salsa & chips, pets, and other feel good, comfy, and relatable themes into their blogs which makes regular people (like me) want to read their content more often.

The five food groups
Yet another relatable theme was the five food groups. Something we all learn about as small children which is kind of fun, and also is taught using cool charts. I didn’t know that blog entries could be segmented into food types. I never thought of my comedy entries as “desserts.” I never knew that my technical how-to articles could be classified as anti-oxidant rich vegetables. I had no idea that my articles about signing companies could be considered the meat of Notary knowledge. Thanks to Ann’s fun and innovative writing, I was able to get this new concept into my head.

What about mustard?
Unfortunately, not all of my blog articles confirm to the various culinary categories. I was not able to find any condiments. Perhaps if I write a controversial entry, that might qualify as a habanero aioli. And what would be a type of blog entry that would be a bread category?

Here’s what I did…
After long thought, I decided that the important things that Notaries want and need include Marketing, Technical How-To, Funny, and they always like to read about Signing Companies. We publish stories, and other types of content too, but these were the types of content that I thought should be scheduled. So, to make it easier to keep it all organized and regular we do Marketing Monday, Technical Tuesday, Funny Friday, and Signing Company Saturday. It is all well organized, and I often pre-publish the posts months in advance. This also makes the writing process more organized because I know how much of each type of article to write.

The result in blog traffic
I am very happy with the results in my blog traffic. We went from around 15,000 visitors per month to about 20,000. Part of the increase is due to increased traffic from Facebook as we have raised our budget for Facebook advertising and promotion. But, the new organization has helped me optimize my posts in each category rather than just optimize post titles in general. This way instead of just deciding what is popular, I can identify what the most popular themes in the technical category are, and then have a completely separate comparison for identifying which marketing posts are the most or least popular.

So, to sum it up — what was that something that was missing in my blog?
Mustard!

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How to write a notes section if you are a beginner
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Eyes on the Notary

Filed under: Ken Edelstein — Tags: , , — admin @ 10:37 am

Eyes on the Notary
Actually, they are electronic eyes. The ever present surveillance cameras are everywhere. That footage you watched on the evening news is a prime example. But, let me back up a bit, and first discuss some older technology. Pictures. On a few occasions over the years, I have been asked to permit the borrower to photograph me. I tell them it’s unnecessary, my picture is on my web site. They usually persist, perhaps wanting a photo of me in their house in case the silverware is found to be missing after my departure. Kidding aside, they want to take a picture of the notary. Often I am called the “closer” or similar; I always correct that misunderstanding.

Here in population dense Manhattan, where I live; cameras are everywhere. The police have them on high poles to record traffic infractions and the public in general. Private buildings “log” who enters; they also have cameras in front to monitor (and record) what occurs on the sidewalk. There is nothing anyone can do to avoid being recorded. I venture a guess that my license plate is recorded dozens of times going to and fro even the closest assignment. Many homes with infants have “nanny cameras” that allow mom to see and hear junior; a good use of the technology.

However, it is the surreptitious in a private home that seems to me to be going too far. Some security systems are set to record perpetually. They keep “stuff” for a week or so, and then reuse the disk space for new video. It kinda makes sense, in a home invasion you probably will not have a chance to turn on the camera. I am sure many of my, and your, signings have been recorded. Is that a good thing? My first thought is that, knowing I don’t do bad things, the video would provide to me proof of no misbehavior. But, there is always the possibility to “edit” the recording, and thus make it show a false scenario. Amazing things can be done with video editing.

As in the “arms race” where each new development is superseded by a still newer methodology; I ask if the notary should also record. I know, this is a toxic subject with no possibility of a right solution. I choose to not record signing sessions. There probably are notaries with discreet tiny tape recorders who capture the audio. They probably want to have proof that they did not “cross the line” in performing their duties to the highest standards. Claims that they “pushed” the deal, or were naughty in other respects can be defended. To my knowledge, from various notary sites, this issue has never really been discussed.

We live in a litigious world, and the tools of audio and video recordings show up in TV coverage and in courtrooms. I think the signing agent has a right to know if they are being recorded. But, it would feel awkward to ask “are you recording this signing”. In a similar manner, asking for the borrower’s permission to audio tape is equally weird. Thus, we have an interesting situation. Some homes are recording all activities without notification. And, there has to be some notaries out there who don’t ask, but proceed to record the session, again without notice or approval.

Don’t look to me for solutions, I have none. It’s a privacy issue, a subject that we deal with daily as we preserve the confidentiality of some very sensitive documents. That, we understand and are good at. But, the issue of stealth recording remains, and is rarely if ever discussed. This blog entry is to open the topic for discussion. There has to be a solution or procedure that addresses the issue. I ask for your thoughts and comments. I’m not the brightest bulb in the chandelier, some really smart people are reading this. Please, comment and open a dialogue on this ignored topic.

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Noternity Court

I’m tired of seeing all of these late night shows about people who can’t keep their pants on. Then, someone gets pregnant, and they don’t know who the father is. What is the future of our country if we can’t even bear children with two sane parents who are married I ask?

In any case. There is a new show call Noternity Court. There are some states that don’t require the use of a notary seal. The problem is, that if the notary’s handwriting is bad enough, you won’t be able to tell after the fact who notarized the document.

JEFF SIMONS: Your honor, it was 20 years ago. I can’t possibly remember if I notarized that document.

SAM (client) : It’s him… I swear it. If you overlook the balding head, the wrinkles around his eyes, and the extra 50 pounds he gained, that’s the same guy.

JEFF SIMONS: How can you be so sure?

JEFF SIMERS: Yeah, I have almost the exact same name and our signatures are so similar, how can you tell the difference.

JUDGE: You’re speaking out of order. Now, I’ve submitted your notary commission signatures and identification to a signature analysis crew. If necessary I’ll also have you take a lie detector test. Since the analysis is late. Let’s start with teh lie detector.

TECHNICIAN: Now, that we have you all wired, up I’m going to ask you a few questions.

JEFF SIMONS: Okay

TECHNICIAN: Is your name Jeff Simons.

JEFF SIMONS: Yes

TECHNICIAN: Were you a notary public in the year 1995

JEFF SIMONS: To the best of my knowledge.

TECHNICIAN: A simple yes or no will do. Our records show you were. Now, did you notarize with anyone else during the period when you were notarizing for Sam.

JEFF SIMONS: No, he was the only one.

TECHNICIAN: (pause) He’s telling the truth.

JUDGE: Okay, we have the signature analytics back. The analysis shows that … (pause)

We adjurn this court session for a special announcement.

There is a sale on journals at the ANS — Antiquated Notary Supplies. Don’t do a notary entry without a journal! Otherwise you might end up in Noternity Court.

JUDGE: Now, since your state doesn’t require you to use a notary seal or notary journal, it is very difficult to qeury a particular notary transaction. Do you know how critical these transactions are? What if you were signing off a Deed to a five million dollar property, and your handwriting was so bad they coudn’t tell who the notary was. I think you need to take your jobs a whole lot more seriously. Now, we got the DNA results back, and the handwriting analysis. Jeff Simons…. you are NOT, the notary!

JEFF SIMONS: I’m not? I can’t believe it. That’s fantastic, because I’m broke and can’t make any notary support payments.

JUDGE: Jeff Simers, you have a similar name to the other Jeff, but you are also not…. the notary!

JEFF SIMERS: I’m not? Well, who is?

JUDGE: The notary’s name is Jeff Somors, and he died in Nebraska many years ago. So, we can’t summon him

MEDIUM: Speak for yourself, we can do a seyonce.

JUDGE: Now, you’re talking, but that is not permissable in court. After all, how could we prove the identity of the spirit?

MEDIUM: The way we prove anyone else’s identity. Just have the spirit sign something, and ask your handwriting analyst!

JUDGE: I think we’re on to something!

Court Adjourned!

.

You might also like:

Notary dragged into court
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=2635

Are you a Yes-tary or a No-tary?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16626

Can you send a loose acknowledgment? You should hear the answers!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16168

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