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January 3, 2011

How Notary work is similar to online dating

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular on Facebook (A little) — Tags: , , — admin @ 11:52 am

I read some material on how Aziz Ansari was talking about online dating and comparing it to applying for jobs. After reading his commentary, I feel that online dating can be similar to Notary work as well. Here are some scenarios.

After the Signing
After you finish the signing, should you call the borrower to tell them how much you liked the signing or should you text them? This depends on the age of the borrower. If the borrower is in their twenties, definately text them. But, if they are forty or over, don’t text them as they’ll probably prefer a call.

NOTARY: “luved the signing, tx”

On the other hand, if you are going to use broken English in your text, the borrower might get the wrong impression. It might be more professional to say,

NOTARY: “I had a wonderful time at the signing. Would it be possible to sign with you again?”

SIGNER: “I’ll think about it. But, I’m signing with other people these days.”

NOTARY: “Is it anything serious? Oh, I’m sorry. I guess I’m prying.”

Having Too Many Choices
One researcher who Aziz commented on learned that having more choices doesn’t make you happier. Life is sometimes easier when we only have a few choices. As a Notary, this is too true. Notaries who are wanted by hundreds of signing companies can never decide if they want to accept the job. What if a better offer comes in? It’s comparable to a beautiful girl at a dance hall. She has so many choices, she not only can’t decide, but takes them for granted. But, from a Notary point of view, it would be easier if all of the offers for signings came in at once, perhaps five at a time. You could pick two that you liked best based on their profile, and forget the rest. I think this business would be much more interesting if you could view an online profile of each borrower — their likes and dislikes, signing preferences, and interests.

NOTARY: So, what do you like to do on the first signing?

SIGNER: I like to sign on the table. Actually sitting on the table. What about you?

NOTARY: I prefer the sofa. If you have a clip board, it is much more relaxing. But, I hate it when you sit on the floor and use the coffee table.

SIGNER: I know… So, what are you doing after the signing?

NOTARY: Not much. Your place or mine? BTW, what’s your place like?

SIGNER: Well, we’re already at my place, so look around. But, since we’re already here, let’s do more sitting on the table. Cool. That’s my thing!

Opening Up
Some Notaries are just too serious at the signing. If you want the signers to open up, you need to be less serious. Instead of discussing the prepayment penalty. Get to know them a little better by discussing your last trip to the circus, or what happened on your last date. Or tell them about funny things that happened on your way to the signing. It’s always awkward on a first signing. So, learn the techniques of making your first signing less awkward.

Put yourself in the Notary’s shoes
Sometimes it might be easier if the borrower put themselves in the Notary’s shoes. They should realize that it is his first time signing with you. He doesn’t know you. He doesn’t know how he’ll react to you. Sure, he read your profile and knows how much you like borrower and signing pieces of paper. Also, try to understand all the different houses the Notary needs to go to and how demanding the job is.

What not to do on the first signing
One Notary did a signing for a borrower who was a little bit forward.

SIGNER: Would you like a Hershey’s kiss at the end of the signing.

NOTARY: “Sorry, I don’t accept Hershey’s kisses on the first signing — I’m not that kind of Notary!”

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You might also like:

Yes, it’s the Notary Dating Show!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15312

NotaryMatch.com — a dating site for Notaries
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=8706

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If you were hiring a Notary, what would you look for?

Filed under: Marketing Articles — Tags: , , , , — admin @ 9:37 am

Most Notaries are missing the point. They know how good they are or how good they think they are. However, they do not understand the perspective of someone looking for a Notary. A skilled shopper has dealt with thousands of Notaries and can cut through the fluff in your profile faster than you can say backdate. The point is not how good you think you are, but creating the right impression so that pro Title companies think that you are the right type of Notary.

I heave dealt with 40,000 Notaries in my career. I see right through the fluff. The minute someone describes themself as professional or reliable, the only thought that goes through my head is that this person has nothing of value to say, so they substitute baseless adjectives for real information. A Notary who is “all that” would have something of substance to say about themselves. They would describe the types of loans they know how to sign and have something worthwhile about how they do their job.

What I hate most is how Notaries spend three paragraphs telling you how all client information will be held confidential and the integrity of the signing is of utmost importance. This tells me nothing except that you know how to waste space telling me a bunch of fluff. Obviously the information is confidential unless you are an identity thief. But, the identity thief is not going to advertise that they are going to sell your client’s information, are they? So, stick to useful facts.

If I can read three paragraphs of your writing and immediately tell that you are a person with experience and knowledge, I might just call you. The ones who write the fluff will not get called unless they have some certifications from agencies that I have faith in — like my own!

The people who browse 123notary are looking for:

1. Current reviews — not reviews from 2011

2. A well written notes section — not a notes section with lots of fluff and self-aggrandizing adjectives

3. General Facts. Facts about what you know how to do, where you go, who you are a member of, equipment, etc.

4. Well organized information. You might have all the facts, but if they are in a jumble, nobody wants to read that.

5. No mistakes — if you make spelling or grammar mistakes, that is proof to me that you will make mistakes on a signing — and don’t try to talk your way out of that. It is a proven fact!

6. Uniqueness — if you can say something interesting and classy about yourself that others cannot say, that counts for you. People are tired of reading what looks like copied and pasted notes sections that look generic. Most notes sections could be true of thousands of Notaries on any directory. So, by being refreshingly unique in a fun and cool way, you attract others.

7. 123notary.com certification — people who use our site want OUR certification, NOT NNA’s. It doesn’t hurt to have NNA”s, but everyone else has it, so it won’t make you stand out. Only the cream of the crop can pass our test, so it proves yourself.

8. High Placement — high placement isn’t free, and browsers know that. If you put your money where it counts, people will respect how serious and dedicated you are. So, spend some money and get a good spot on 123notary if you take your business seriously.

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You might also like:

Overseas companies hiring Notaries in America
http://blog.123notary.com/?s=hiring

Notary state of the union address
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16244

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January 1, 2011

Eyes on the Notary

Filed under: Ken Edelstein — Tags: , , — admin @ 10:37 am

Eyes on the Notary
Actually, they are electronic eyes. The ever present surveillance cameras are everywhere. That footage you watched on the evening news is a prime example. But, let me back up a bit, and first discuss some older technology. Pictures. On a few occasions over the years, I have been asked to permit the borrower to photograph me. I tell them it’s unnecessary, my picture is on my web site. They usually persist, perhaps wanting a photo of me in their house in case the silverware is found to be missing after my departure. Kidding aside, they want to take a picture of the notary. Often I am called the “closer” or similar; I always correct that misunderstanding.

Here in population dense Manhattan, where I live; cameras are everywhere. The police have them on high poles to record traffic infractions and the public in general. Private buildings “log” who enters; they also have cameras in front to monitor (and record) what occurs on the sidewalk. There is nothing anyone can do to avoid being recorded. I venture a guess that my license plate is recorded dozens of times going to and fro even the closest assignment. Many homes with infants have “nanny cameras” that allow mom to see and hear junior; a good use of the technology.

However, it is the surreptitious in a private home that seems to me to be going too far. Some security systems are set to record perpetually. They keep “stuff” for a week or so, and then reuse the disk space for new video. It kinda makes sense, in a home invasion you probably will not have a chance to turn on the camera. I am sure many of my, and your, signings have been recorded. Is that a good thing? My first thought is that, knowing I don’t do bad things, the video would provide to me proof of no misbehavior. But, there is always the possibility to “edit” the recording, and thus make it show a false scenario. Amazing things can be done with video editing.

As in the “arms race” where each new development is superseded by a still newer methodology; I ask if the notary should also record. I know, this is a toxic subject with no possibility of a right solution. I choose to not record signing sessions. There probably are notaries with discreet tiny tape recorders who capture the audio. They probably want to have proof that they did not “cross the line” in performing their duties to the highest standards. Claims that they “pushed” the deal, or were naughty in other respects can be defended. To my knowledge, from various notary sites, this issue has never really been discussed.

We live in a litigious world, and the tools of audio and video recordings show up in TV coverage and in courtrooms. I think the signing agent has a right to know if they are being recorded. But, it would feel awkward to ask “are you recording this signing”. In a similar manner, asking for the borrower’s permission to audio tape is equally weird. Thus, we have an interesting situation. Some homes are recording all activities without notification. And, there has to be some notaries out there who don’t ask, but proceed to record the session, again without notice or approval.

Don’t look to me for solutions, I have none. It’s a privacy issue, a subject that we deal with daily as we preserve the confidentiality of some very sensitive documents. That, we understand and are good at. But, the issue of stealth recording remains, and is rarely if ever discussed. This blog entry is to open the topic for discussion. There has to be a solution or procedure that addresses the issue. I ask for your thoughts and comments. I’m not the brightest bulb in the chandelier, some really smart people are reading this. Please, comment and open a dialogue on this ignored topic.

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Noternity Court

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Popular on Linked In,Sit-Coms — Tags: , , , — admin @ 8:10 am

I’m tired of seeing all of these late night shows about people who can’t keep their pants on. Then, someone gets pregnant, and they don’t know who the father is. What is the future of our country if we can’t even bear children with two sane parents who are married I ask?

In any case. There is a new show call Noternity Court. There are some states that don’t require the use of a notary seal. The problem is, that if the notary’s handwriting is bad enough, you won’t be able to tell after the fact who notarized the document.

JEFF SIMONS: Your honor, it was 20 years ago. I can’t possibly remember if I notarized that document.

SAM (client) : It’s him… I swear it. If you overlook the balding head, the wrinkles around his eyes, and the extra 50 pounds he gained, that’s the same guy.

JEFF SIMONS: How can you be so sure?

JEFF SIMERS: Yeah, I have almost the exact same name and our signatures are so similar, how can you tell the difference.

JUDGE: You’re speaking out of order. Now, I’ve submitted your notary commission signatures and identification to a signature analysis crew. If necessary I’ll also have you take a lie detector test. Since the analysis is late. Let’s start with teh lie detector.

TECHNICIAN: Now, that we have you all wired, up I’m going to ask you a few questions.

JEFF SIMONS: Okay

TECHNICIAN: Is your name Jeff Simons.

JEFF SIMONS: Yes

TECHNICIAN: Were you a notary public in the year 1995

JEFF SIMONS: To the best of my knowledge.

TECHNICIAN: A simple yes or no will do. Our records show you were. Now, did you notarize with anyone else during the period when you were notarizing for Sam.

JEFF SIMONS: No, he was the only one.

TECHNICIAN: (pause) He’s telling the truth.

JUDGE: Okay, we have the signature analytics back. The analysis shows that … (pause)

We adjurn this court session for a special announcement.

There is a sale on journals at the ANS — Antiquated Notary Supplies. Don’t do a notary entry without a journal! Otherwise you might end up in Noternity Court.

JUDGE: Now, since your state doesn’t require you to use a notary seal or notary journal, it is very difficult to qeury a particular notary transaction. Do you know how critical these transactions are? What if you were signing off a Deed to a five million dollar property, and your handwriting was so bad they coudn’t tell who the notary was. I think you need to take your jobs a whole lot more seriously. Now, we got the DNA results back, and the handwriting analysis. Jeff Simons…. you are NOT, the notary!

JEFF SIMONS: I’m not? I can’t believe it. That’s fantastic, because I’m broke and can’t make any notary support payments.

JUDGE: Jeff Simers, you have a similar name to the other Jeff, but you are also not…. the notary!

JEFF SIMERS: I’m not? Well, who is?

JUDGE: The notary’s name is Jeff Somors, and he died in Nebraska many years ago. So, we can’t summon him

MEDIUM: Speak for yourself, we can do a seyonce.

JUDGE: Now, you’re talking, but that is not permissable in court. After all, how could we prove the identity of the spirit?

MEDIUM: The way we prove anyone else’s identity. Just have the spirit sign something, and ask your handwriting analyst!

JUDGE: I think we’re on to something!

Court Adjourned!

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You might also like:

Notary dragged into court
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=2635

Are you a Yes-tary or a No-tary?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16626

Can you send a loose acknowledgment? You should hear the answers!
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16168

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A 2nd Date With jeremy

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular Overall — Tags: , , , , , — admin @ 12:05 am

A 2nd date with Jeremy

Sealia and Jeremy hit it off, so much on their first date, it was time for a sequel. In fact, they had gotten to know each other so well, that if they were notarizing each other, they would say “Personally known” instad of using satisfactory evidence to identify the signer.

Sealia: “We know each other so well, we can complete each other’s Jurat verbiage”
Jeremy: “I know!”

So, this dynamic duo decides to see the movie, “A Case of Mistaken Identity”. It is a movie about someone who was notarized using a stolen ID card. The police were informed, and then arrested the wrong person. In any case, Jeremy asked
what type of rating the movie had, such as “G”, “PG”, “R”, 2 thumbs up, etc. Sealia replied that the movie got four stars on Notary Rotary.

The couple drove to the theater and parked. Jeremy wanted to use a credit card to purchase tickets.
The ticket lady said, “May I see some ID please?”
Jeremy misheard her and thought she asked the name of the movie he wanted to see.
Jeremy said, “A case of mistaken identity”
Ticket Lady, “No, there’s nothing wrong with your identity, the picture on this ID looks just like you, and your eyes really are blue — hold on, let me take a closer look — yup…”
Jeremy: “No, not the ID, the movie”
Ticket Lady, “Oh, so you mistook the identity of the movie!”
Jeremy: “No, I mistook what you said when you asked for my ID”
Ticket Lady, “Never mind, your credit card and ID are fine… what movie would you like to see?”
Jeremy: “Two tickets for A case of mistaken identity”
Ticket Lady, “Here you go! Enjoy the show!”

Then, the couple go to the consession stand. They see all of the popcorn and other treats, and ask if they have any good consessions. The attendant said, “We actually have notary consessions — we have a voucher that states that if the notary makes a mistake, that the return trip to correct the mistake is free as a consession.” Then, Jeremy asks, “Does that consession voucher come with a complimentary bucket of popcorn?” Then, the attendent responsded, “Yeah, for another $6.25, I’ll make that consession.”

Then, our conceded (but, not conceited) couple proceeded to get seated. Then, the lights were dimmed, and the movie began.
Jeremy: “Oh no, what if the ticket lady gave me back the WRONG ID? I better check my wallet!”
Sealia: “You are paranoid, I saw that she gave you back the correct ID, and your Credit Card!”
Jeremy: “Next time, I’m paying for the movie using paypal up front, like Ken gets paid for his signings — It’s much easier.”

Then the movie starts. They get to the point of the movie where the very best scene happens — well, the best scene according to Jeremy. The scene where they show the sworn Oath. Then a big fat guy tries to walk across the row in front of them to his seat. Jeremy is livid that fatso would prevent him from seeing the Oath. So, Jeremy gets out of his seat, and sticks his head to the left of Fat Albert, and then when Albert moves to the left, Jeremy stuck his head to the right.

Movie seer: “Hey, do you mind?”
Jeremy: “He’s blocking my favorite scene!”
Movie seer: “Well, I want to see the Oath too, buddy”
Jeremy: “You want an Oath? I’ll give you an Oath… I SWEAR I will if you don’t shut up!”

They finished the movie. The police arrested the wrong guy, but after they fingerprinted him, they realized that the real criminal was still on the

loose. So, they let the falsely arrested guy go. Then, our duo walks down past Mann’s Chinese theater in Hollywood and see handprints and signatures. But, there are no Acknowledgments for the signatures! If we see some wet cement, we need to put a mold for an Acknowledgment form in the cement! We’ll put it with an imprint of my embosser next to Roy Rogers signature, that will trigger a reaction!

Next it was time for a hike in Griffith Park. We went to hike to the Hollywood sign.
Sealia: “This would be a great place to notarize — you sign next to the Hollywood sign!”
Jeremy: “Why not notarize the Hollywood sign itself?”
Sealia: “Wow, you think big. You can do that?”
Jeremy: “No”

ring-ring
Jeremy: “123notary, this is Jeremy”
Caller: “Yeah, you have my named spelled wrong on my listing!”
Jeremy: “You are interrupting my date to tell me this? Couldn’t you just send me an email? I’m not next to a computer right now”
Caller: “Never mind, I’ll call Carmen”
Jeremy: “Carmen cannot solve that problem either. Just send me an email”
Caller: “In that case I’ll call Sally”
Jeremy: “This conversation is over!”

Meanwhile, the NNA hiking group was walking up the hill, getting a guided tour of the Hollywood sign area. They gave a speech where they named the Notary of the Year. They called Jeremy to stand in front of the sign and said, “We appoint you, Brad Mulligan as Notary of the Year!”

Jeremy said, “I”m sorry, but I am not Brad. I think we have a case of mistaken identity!”

Tweets:
(1) Sealia & Jeremy got to know each other so well, that if they were notarizing each other, they would say “Personally Known.”
(2) (at the movies during the Oath scene) You want an Oath? I’ll give you an Oath. I swear I will if you don’t shut up!
(3) “We know each other so well, we can complete each other’s Jurat verbiage”

You might also like:

My date with Jeremy
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=4473

123notary behind the scenes
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=2499

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December 18, 2010

Notary Etiquette from A to Z

Filed under: Comprehensive Guides,Etiquette,Loan Signing 101,Ninja Theme Articles,Popular on Facebook (A little),Popular Overall 2010,Signing Tips — Tags: , , , , , , — admin @ 8:18 am

Notary etiquette from A-Z

Here are some basic rules of notary etiquette to keep you out of trouble and on good terms with your clients.

Don’t park in the driveway?
But, that is what driveways are for. They are for parking in. Wrong! They are for the borrower to park in, but NOT for you to park in without permission. You could be taking someone’s spot, or blocking someone. You might be leaking coolant on their driveway too. If there is a snowstorm and a snow plow will destroy your car, or if there is nowhere else to park, then ask to park in their driveway. Most people will not mind if you park in their driveway, but a few will mind.

Introduce yourself at the door.
Its good to have a pre-canned speech to give at the door. Let the borrowers know your full name, and that you will be assisting and supervising (facilitating) the signing of their loan. Let them know that your job is to introduce the documents and figures in their loan, but not to actually explain any of the concepts particular to their loan. Let the borrowers know that the lender is the only one qualified to answer specific questions about their loan.

Confirm the signing
Its polite for the notary to call the borrowers and confirm when they will be coming, and especially who is to show up at the signing. If Aunt Matilda is on the loan documents, she needs to cancel that visit to the hair salon and be at the signing.

Don’t make unpleasant remarks
Don’t make negative remarks about anyone regardless of whether they are associated with the loan or not.

Don’t discuss politics
Stick to talking about neutral topics like traffic and weather. Politics can run people the wrong way. Freedom of speech does not apply to notaries on the job. You have more freedom of speech in Moscow than on a signing. Talking about the wrong subject matter can get you off of a signing companies list, and then you lose work.

Speak clearly
A notary who mumbles, or speaks incoherently will not be a favorite with anyone. People need you to enunciate on the phone and in person.

Don’t rush the borrowers
Unless you agree on the length of your signing ahead of time, its rude to rush the borrowers. If you are having a night with ten signings and you will be late to all of the rest of the signings, then you are in a pinch. If you legitimately have to leave at a certain time, you can mention that you have to leave at 8pm, and that they are welcome to read their borrower’s copies for the next 72 hours and cancel the loan if they are not happy with any of the terms or figures.

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You might also like:

Compilation of posts about Notary etiquette
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=20505

Notary Marketing 102: Phone & communication etiquette
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=19764

What are Jeremy’s favorite blog entries?
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=18837

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