This is not the type of chip you eat with salsa. It is a chip that you implant in your brain. It will automatically connect you with what we call, “Universal Notary Consciousness” and it is for your benefit, and for your safety. You will be required by law to have this chip implanted by a doctor, otherwise you would be too risky to have a Notary commission.

This chip will have several functions, all of which are critical to our industry.

1. It will track whether you really meant it when you swore to support and defend the constitution. If you meant it, that is a problem because the constitution defends liberty and was specifically crafted to fight tyranny. If you believe in the constitution or America, you are a potential trouble maker.

California Notary Oath of Office Verbiage
Do you solemnly swear that you will support the Constitution of the United States and the Constitution of this State, and that you will discharge the duties of the office of Notary Public in and for said County to the best of your ability? When are you required by law to do Oaths?

2. It will track if you are thinking for yourself, as it can read thoughts. If you are, it will shut your thoughts down.

3. If you need thinking help from UNC or Universal Notary Consciousness, it will help you. That way, if you are in a difficult notarization, that involves giving someone a vaccine, the consciousness will tell you how to handle differences in opinion and help you find the “correct” ideology to promote. The main thing is to assure the signer that the vaccine is good for them and will make them stronger and better. It will help them think in new ways, and make new friends. And it is for the benefit of society to keep others safe from them. And that they would be a risk to society if they didn’t take the vaccine.

You might be thinking, what does being a Notary have to do with vaccinating people? The masks, social distancing, shutdowns, endless rules, vaccines, and social control are all about the same thing — controlling you, demeaning you, and eventually reducing the world population.

But, it will be very hard for people to succeed in their agenda if even 1% of the population stands up for themselves. People are so passive these days. Boys are taught not to be toxic and given drugs if they are. This all leads to a population of sheep who never stand for anything and can be sterilized, put out of work, or murdered through covert means.

The sad news is that Notary chip is already in you. It is called lamestream media and it tells you how to think, and most of the words that come out of your month about meaningful issues are verbatum from fake news — or from Fox news which preaches the opposite. But, few of us have our own thoughts.

So, if you think this article is “scary”, the article is not what you should be afraid about. Go outside your house, looking around, and tell me what you see — tell me what you see is not scary. Not a single person is coughing, not a single person is sick, yet 90% of society thinks we are in a pandemic. Is that not brainwashing? The Notary chip is already in you. Wake up!

I know, I know, I know. The borrowers like the Notary so much, they wouldn’t let him leave. That’s not what happened.

A guy goes to a signing like he always does. He sits down at the table, and has people sign the documents. The family was rude and used profanity when asking him who he was and what this was about. But, they signed the documents. Then, there was an issue about title, and with a foreclosure issue. The Notary told them that the Note was enough without having a Grant Deed, or QuitClaim to foreclose on the house. He attempted to leave the house, but the husband blocked the door, and the wife jumped on him from behind.

The Notary forced his way out the door. Basically, the family did NOT want him leaving with those documents. He explained that the documents were the property of the title company and not the borrower’s documents and that is why he needed to take them. I’m not sure it was worth it.

After the Notary was out the door and on his way to the car, the son of the couple came out of the house with a baseball bat. This family just isn’t kidding around. The Notary warned the kid that he had a gun and that the gun would be a lot more effective than a baseball bat.

The Notary drove away, and reported the issue to the Sheriff. The Sheriff asked if he wanted them to press charges and he said he just wanted law enforcement to give them a stern lecture since nobody was hurt.

So, when people ask, “Is the mobile notary profession a safe one?” The answer is, if there is a serious issue with the rate, APR, or with a foreclosure, it might not be. This is the second incident of violence against a Notary that I have heard of after serving 65,000 Notaries. It pays to confirm the signing by phone to see if the people are complete nutcases. That extra minute spent could save you some grief down the line.

My current guru says that the Messiah will be a public figure by 2034. He will be born in Israel, and hopefully speak English. Will he be Jesus? Not sure. But, he will be similar to Jesus, although he will likely be a different soul and have a different name. But, the basic spiritual message will be similar.

But, there is more. The spiritual grace that will be pervasive in the atmosphere will be the biggest blessing you can ask for. Such a wonderful atmosphere for prayer, meditation and contemplation.

The world will have to go through a big upheaval in the meantime though. I am expecting millions to die, asteroids, political upheaval (too late, we already have that, riots (already had that, but predicted it many years ago.), starvation (just as long as I have Thai food I’m good.) and more. I think the stock market will make it though. World War Three is also on the table. Let’s hope that doesn’t affect us that badly. It might be more in the Middle East, Europe and India. But, we’ll see.

Some rabbis say that we won’t be using money when the Messiah comes. I think we will still have money, because it is necessary, but we might see and use money in a very much more spiritual way. Many rabbis are saying that the situation in the world will be so desperate that people will be screaming for a Messiah to come. I am at this point already. I have lost faith in our government, country, citizens, immigrants, etc. Nobody can save me but God, and he allowed my outdoor gym to get shut down, so I am not completely satisfied with him either. Maybe I should write him an email.

On a brighter note, the future Messiah that Jews call, “Meshiach Ben David” (Messiah, son of David) will be a spiritual leader for all believers regardless of faith. He’ll lead you even if you don’t like Israeli food, halva, or shirazi salad — I know… hard to imagine anyone from Israel accepting someone who doesn’t like hummos or sahoog (a yeminite chutney), but it’s true!

He might need to get notarized, so get your RON (remote online notary) commission right away. You can notarize him when he is in Tel Aviv with that.

So, try to keep healthy so you can meet this guy in about fourteen years or see him on television. On a parting note, I wonder if he will let me have his email address. Hmm. askthemessiah@gmail.com