I know, I know, I know. The borrowers like the Notary so much, they wouldn’t let him leave. That’s not what happened.

A guy goes to a signing like he always does. He sits down at the table, and has people sign the documents. The family was rude and used profanity when asking him who he was and what this was about. But, they signed the documents. Then, there was an issue about title, and with a foreclosure issue. The Notary told them that the Note was enough without having a Grant Deed, or QuitClaim to foreclose on the house. He attempted to leave the house, but the husband blocked the door, and the wife jumped on him from behind.

The Notary forced his way out the door. Basically, the family did NOT want him leaving with those documents. He explained that the documents were the property of the title company and not the borrower’s documents and that is why he needed to take them. I’m not sure it was worth it.

After the Notary was out the door and on his way to the car, the son of the couple came out of the house with a baseball bat. This family just isn’t kidding around. The Notary warned the kid that he had a gun and that the gun would be a lot more effective than a baseball bat.

The Notary drove away, and reported the issue to the Sheriff. The Sheriff asked if he wanted them to press charges and he said he just wanted law enforcement to give them a stern lecture since nobody was hurt.

So, when people ask, “Is the mobile notary profession a safe one?” The answer is, if there is a serious issue with the rate, APR, or with a foreclosure, it might not be. This is the second incident of violence against a Notary that I have heard of after serving 65,000 Notaries. It pays to confirm the signing by phone to see if the people are complete nutcases. That extra minute spent could save you some grief down the line.

My current guru says that the Messiah will be a public figure by 2034. He will be born in Israel, and hopefully speak English. Will he be Jesus? Not sure. But, he will be similar to Jesus, although he will likely be a different soul and have a different name. But, the basic spiritual message will be similar.

But, there is more. The spiritual grace that will be pervasive in the atmosphere will be the biggest blessing you can ask for. Such a wonderful atmosphere for prayer, meditation and contemplation.

The world will have to go through a big upheaval in the meantime though. I am expecting millions to die, asteroids, political upheaval (too late, we already have that, riots (already had that, but predicted it many years ago.), starvation (just as long as I have Thai food I’m good.) and more. I think the stock market will make it though. World War Three is also on the table. Let’s hope that doesn’t affect us that badly. It might be more in the Middle East, Europe and India. But, we’ll see.

Some rabbis say that we won’t be using money when the Messiah comes. I think we will still have money, because it is necessary, but we might see and use money in a very much more spiritual way. Many rabbis are saying that the situation in the world will be so desperate that people will be screaming for a Messiah to come. I am at this point already. I have lost faith in our government, country, citizens, immigrants, etc. Nobody can save me but God, and he allowed my outdoor gym to get shut down, so I am not completely satisfied with him either. Maybe I should write him an email.

On a brighter note, the future Messiah that Jews call, “Meshiach Ben David” (Messiah, son of David) will be a spiritual leader for all believers regardless of faith. He’ll lead you even if you don’t like Israeli food, halva, or shirazi salad — I know… hard to imagine anyone from Israel accepting someone who doesn’t like hummos or sahoog (a yeminite chutney), but it’s true!

He might need to get notarized, so get your RON (remote online notary) commission right away. You can notarize him when he is in Tel Aviv with that.

So, try to keep healthy so you can meet this guy in about fourteen years or see him on television. On a parting note, I wonder if he will let me have his email address. Hmm. askthemessiah@gmail.com

As with any science fiction horror movie, there has to be an evil and mad scientist who creates some catastrophe, disease, or situation. It is usually the same lunatic that creates a genetically engineered virus who also has the cure.

But, is the cure toxic? I don’t know. But, my current guru says it is very toxic. (I have a current guru and an ex who died a few years ago, and some other gurus I channel for spiritual information. It’s complicated.

Notaries will have to wait in line to get a vaccine. The nurses, teachers, and old folks get their cut of the action first. The vulnerable probably next. But, Notaries are far down the list unless you are a vulnerable Notary. The fake news media has programmed us all to be afraid… didn’t work with me. Correctly, I am afraid. Not about Covid Covid Covid, but about Vaccine Vaccine Vaccine.

People are going to wait in line and pay big bucks for something that some conspiracy theorists think has a chip in it. I don’t think that is possible, otherwise it would be lodged in your brain and cause you to have a stroke. But, it could cause havoc with your immune system or DNA, and that is what I am worried about. That is a long term risk not a short term issue. No side effects might show up for years.

The irony about my former spiritual group is that my former guru Chari-ji preached living in harmony with nature. I am so happy he taught this, because now is the time when that lesson pays off. I don’t think I need a mask, a vaccine, or to have my outdoor gym equipment shut down (I jump the fence daily.) I got a little nervous when security was following me while I was walking away. Were they upset that I jumped the little orange plastic fence, or were they looking for an address where I was walking? Paranoid.

But, the successor of my guru called Daaji made his millions in pharmaceuticals and doesn’t look too healthy. Hint hint… If you want to be healthy, stay away from pharmaceuticals. So, Chari-ji says to live in harmony with nature which translates into stay away from drugs. His successor made his entire career out of drugs. Hmm.

My advice is — learn to be healthy without crutches like vaccines and drugs. Take vitamins and get them naturally through sunlight and healthy foods. Get exercise, socialize, and deal with signing companies who pay on time and treat you nicely (if such a thing exists.) When it is your time to go, then accept that. What is the point of living if you are having surgeries every three months, scans, twenty prescriptions, etc? That’s not what I want. I eat vegetables, but I don’t want to be a vegetable — unless it’s an organic vegetable!

Search your inner voice to see what you should do.

The way I see shutdowns is that they keep you alive by preventing you from living. You have to get take out, you can’t go to work, you can’t do much. The only things you can do are walk down the street, go to the supermarket, and get takeout from your favorite restaurant. The numbers show that even if you have limited access to other people, you still are very likely to get sick if you are vulnerable. So the reducing social contact doesn’t keep you safe (although it might make you feel safe or delay your sickness) but not being physically vulnerable by having low vitamin D levels or poor health is what really matters.

The mainstream culture is trying to tell us that you might kill grandma by living and having a normal life. I think that as long as grandma has locked herself in her basement, she is safe regardless of what I do. The problem is what she is doing or not doing. Suddenly my life has to be completely altered to safeguard or allegedly safeguard someone else who doesn’t take precautions and to whom I owe nothing. It doesn’t add up unless you use what I term “Covid Logic.” A type of logic where nothing makes sense, numbers are always fake, and there is always an ulterior motive for any restriction.

MARY’S RON SIGNING
We had a lady customer who did a RON signing. It took 45 minutes using Pavaso. Most of the time was used using the identification software.

The client found her through a builder that knew her as a Notary, and the customer was a client of the builder in Minnesota.

CAROLINE’S RON SIGNING
Another Notary I talked to does online notarizations and has customers around the world in places such as Dubai, Germany, etc. But, she had a lot of technical issues particularly with cameras and her signing took several hours.

SUMMARY
Some people who do RON signings who are familiar with the software and don’t have a problem with their computer or the app or platform get RON signings done quickly. But, for people who don’t do it regularly, it is easy to have trouble. My suggestion is don’t become a Remote Online Notary unless you really love technology and not seeing people face to face and intend to take the profession very seriously. It seems to not work out well for those who are just doing it on the side.

Many people think that if they report spam calls that found them on 123notary, that I have a magic button to stop this behavior. There are scam calls too and many people get them. I don’t know who the bad guys are any more than you do. The fact they found you on my directory doesn’t make me any more guilty than you or some random stranger on the street.

I can’t do anything about this. Here is what you can do.

1. Block anyone who is a spammer or scammer calling you for any reason from any source of information.

2. Unlist yourself from public directories in general. It might be hard to get business that way, but it is at least an option.

3. Report the spammers to the FBI. But, don’t report us as guilty because we have no connection to these maniacs. Most of them are not even on American soil.

SUMMARY
In short, there is nothing you can do that will lead to any positive conclusion with spammers other than to block them and avoid talking to them. If you reward them by talking to them they will just bother more people. If you reject them right off the bat and don’t give them a chance, then they will stop bothering others.

HOWEVER
Some people get bothered by one or two spammers, and then get a legitimate call from me or a client — and they treat me like a spammer just because the last call was a spammer. You need to distinguish what is the difference between a regular call and a spam call.

REGULAR CALL vs. SPAM CALL
1. A regular call will call for a purpose, speak grammatical English, not be agitated, or muffled in their tone.

2. A regular call will have administrative access to your account either directly, or will be able to get to me for access to passwords. A spam call will not have that access.

3. A regular call will not ask for money from a complete stranger unless we never talked before when your renewal is due. But, I normally send renewal emails a month or two before calling to make it easier.

DON’T BE RUDE TO JEREMY
If you are rude to me when I call, you will get written up. So, don’t assume someone is a spammer just because the last one was. This problem happens to me once a month and I don’t like false accusations, and I write people up. The reason I write people up for this is because if you treat me poorly, you will treat legitimate clients poorly who call from our directory and that is bad for the overall reputation of my directory with end users.

A Notary was bored, and invested in a time machine. He wanted to see how people lived in different times and places. So, he set the machine to send him to ancient Egypt to see the pyramids in Giza. But, the machine malfunctioned and he ended up in the Boston area in 1775.

The Notary got out of his British looking phone booth, and walked around on a dirt road bewildered thinking, “Where am I? This doesn’t look like Egypt. I want some felafel.”

A crazy guy on a horse almost ran him over screaming, “The redcoats are coming — The British are coming.” The British were leaving Boston to march to Concord to confiscate some ammunition, weapons, gunpowder, etc., from the colonials.

NOTARY: Hey watch where you’re going.

PAUL REVERE: You shouldn’t walk in the middle of the road lad, it’s dangerous.

NOTARY: And learn to signal your turns. It’s common courtesy.

PAUL REVERE: I’ll work on it. Wait a second, what century are you from. Those are very odd clothes.

NOTARY: Ay lad… now I’m talking like you guys. I’m from the future and my time machine broke.

PAUL REVERE: We can’t even get gun powder easily here in the middle of a revolution, so I don’t think I can help you. But, do you know where I can get a good Notary Public?

NOTARY: Ay laddie, I’m a notary, and I brought my stamp. It doesn’t expire for a while, but I’m commissioned in Massachusetts

PAUL REVERE: Massachusetts colony?

NOTARY: It becomes a state. There are 50 states in my time.

PAUL REVERE: 50 lad? My head is spinning. Next thing you tell me is that we become the most powerful country in the world, and they give partial credit to me just for riding Barnie around screaming the news.

NOTARY: Actually, you become a well loved historical figure. Here, can you sign your John Hancock here?

PAUL REVERE: I know John. He’s an acquaintance of mine. He lives in Massachusetts you know. Born here and will probably die here.

NOTARY: His signature will become famous. He will sign the Declaration of Independence in another year or so.

PAUL REVERE: Wow, so I’m going to be famous and he is too. I’ll drink to that. Jump on back, I’m going to Monroe Tavern in Lexington to warn the locals, and then on to Concord. Just let me sign your log book, I hope this is not considered backdating by about 240 years, but… as they say in the valley — what… ever… Please stamp my document. Do you need wax for that?

NOTARY: We don’t use wax in my time.

PAUL REVERE: Okay, we’ll have a pint in Lexington, and then on to Concord. Then we can try to see what we can do about time machines. Hey, I have a friend in Phili who loves gadgets and futuristic inventions. His name is Ben Franklin — great with the ladies. We can ask him to ride up. It’s only a few days Southwest of here.

NOTARY: I guess I’m stuck here, so we’ll have hasty pudding, drinks and do some sniper attacks on the red coats in the mean time.

PAUL REVERE: Good. Are you good with a musket?

NOTARY: Gee, we’re a little close on this horse. So much for social distancing.

PAUL REVERE: Don’t worry, I don’t have smallpox. Onward ho…. Yee Haw!!!

Masks give us alleged “safety.”
Most people generally like mask restrictions because they give us the illusion of “safety.” The science doesn’t show any proof that paper masks do anything significant to slow the spread of Covid-19, and the statistics don’t show that states with mask mandates were any safe than those without. However, they give us theater and political restrictions which is what the people want — anything to avoid freedom! Now you can take people’s rights away not for safety, but for the illusion of safety — that’s even better!

The Vaccine
So, we have gotten to a new stage in our paranoia where the only thing that can save us is the vaccine. It is like living in a horror movie, that doesn’t end after two hours and fifteen minutes and where you can get no popcorn. The movie keeps going and going and going and nobody ever gets sick of it either.

But, we still have to wear masks
The problem is, now that many people have taken their vaccine, we still have to wear masks. Even the very people who took the vaccine have to wear masks for their safety. What is the point of taking the vaccine if you still have to wear a mask?

If you took the vaccine and the other person you are with also did, THEN you don’t have to wear a mask. But, if one or more of you didn’t take the vaccine then you both have to wear a mask. That makes no sense.

The moving goalpost just never ends. We have to wear masks because not everyone has taken the vaccine. So, we have to go around pressuring everyone we know to take the vaccine because somehow our lives will be better if they take a vaccine that in itself doesn’t keep us safe. So taking the vaccine didn’t keep you safe, but by me taking it too, that will help make the useless vaccine you took somehow more effective — it all makes sense.

So, once everyone has taken the vaccine, then I predict that we will still have to wear masks indefinitely because there will be a new threat — VARIANTS. And for the next several years we will have to worry about variants.

SUMMARY
It doesn’t matter what happens in the future, people like Fauci will go to any lengths to keep us in a permanent state of fear and restriction. It doesn’t matter if there are logical reasons for the restrictions or not. It doesn’t matter if Fauci will lose his professional credibility or not either. He will make endless suggestions for restriction after restriction after restriction until the people stand up and say — enough.

Personally, when they lengthened the initial two week shut down, my initial thought was, they could string us along forever, and God knows what their motivations are. What puzzles me is — why are the majority of the people not only going along with endless and nonsensical restrictions which ruin our lives and the character of our formerly free nation? How long will it take before people say, “enough” or will this just drag on for years?

I think that vaccine is toxic and dangerous and we will start seeing serious illnesses from that vaccine. The question is will those illnesses happen in a few months, or will they not start for years? It takes your RNA time to crank out weird proteins in unnatural amounts. This vaccine amounts to no less than genetic engineering. And there are no long term studies done on humans to see what the long term results will be. So, half the world basically signed up for an experiment. Fun. But, if the experiment doesn’t end so well, it might not be fun for the half the planet that signed up for it.

JEREMY: Now for the Notary news of the day. It has been alleged that China interfered with a process within the local secretary of state’s office that influenced a decision on Notary policy. Now, Notaries are not required to verify if an ID is actually real using a serious of logical steps.

TUCKER CARLSON: This is fake news!

HANNITY: That’s not fake news. Jeremy runs a blog with Notary articles. It is not news to begin with. It’s fake non-news.

TRUMP: All I want to know… is why does most of the trouble we have in the United States, most of the spying, espionage, interference with elections, interference with notary divisions, and most of the new infections diseases always come from (pause) … Chi—na.

JEREMY: I love that you got more than that the last ten presidents all put together. I love how you got touch on trade with China. I love how you give the media a hard time. But, the thing I love most about you, is how you say, “China.”

TRUMP: Thanks, I appreciate that. After all the abuse I’ve taken, it just makes me not want to go to work in the morning. But, now I’ll be living in Florida and going back to running my businesses. So, maybe I’ll feel like going to work in the morning. You have to go to work in the morning. I repeat myself a lot. And sometimes I repeat myself.

TUCKER CARLSON: I have a better idea. Why not call it “un-news.”

LAURA INGRAHAM: ha… I kind of like that. That has a ring to it. Un-news. Fake un-news.

JEREMY: Umm. How can I say this. This is not news, un-news, fake news, or anything of the sort. It is a satirical article for Notaries. They get bored, my job is to inform and entertain.

TUCKER: CARLSON: Good point. It isn’t fake news, and it shouldn’t be. We would never publish anything like this. Why would we? Why would anyone? Why would you? It doesn’t make the world a better place, not does it make your life any better.

JEREMY: I like to write useful information sometimes and other times I like to write about nonsense. Why not. I write it because I have freedom of press just as long as I don’t try to promote it on Facebook.

LAURA INGRAHAM: Yes, Facebook thinks that freedom of press is a risk to national security, at least if it is on their platform.

JEREMY: I think that the problem is that Zuckerberg learned Chinese, and started thinking like they do over there — repression. But, I learned Chinese and feel the opposite. But, I studied in Taiwan and have a Taiwanese accent in Chinese. Hmm. If I learn a Peking accent will that change my world view?

TUCKER CARLSON: It might change your worldview and it should. Where you live affects your consciousness. It always does, and there is no denying it. In fact, where you live affects your way of thinking to such a degree, that you should strongly consider not living in a place that makes you think like a freedom hating control freak.

JEREMY: Unless you like being a freedom hating control freak. Some people like that kind of thing — especially in California where I live.

Back in my day… I’m only 51 so perhaps I shouldn’t talk that way. But, FedEx drop boxes were everywhere. I had to ship out two loan signing courses to customers. One was a few days late so I wanted to get it out fast. I typically walk to my local FedEx spot on Wilshire. They have no parking but it is only 20 minutes by foot and I enjoy the exercise… usually. They were closed for Covid-19 and there was no drop box. What is the world coming to.

So, I searched the internet to see where some local drop boxes were. My handheld wouldn’t tell me, so I walked back home after I got a salad to go. My computer showed me one drop box behind our local Farmer’s Market and another one half a mile West of my complex’s entrance. So, I went to the first location. Security told me where the box was. I went looking all around and there was no box by the newsstand as I was told. I went to the other location. Also no drop box. I had already wasted two hours looking for locations.

My housemate told me to call the 800 number. On my way back I did exactly that. I talked to an annoying machine which had me clarify everything I said about four times, and then make me wait for a long array of menu options so that they could serve me better before handing me off to a representative which is what I requested. After I finished the ordeal (I have no patience talking to robots) they told me to go to a particular web page and offered to text me a link. I swore at the machine and hung up. Then I started calling local FedEx providers and found one downtown which is too far to go at night, plus they were in the hood and I’m not going there after 6pm in any case. They found me a nearby place that was open in Beverly Hills.

So, I drove to Beverly Hills. I didn’t know where the intersection was, so I was in the right lane, and FedEx was on the left, so I stopped in the middle of traffic hoping people would pass me. One guy just stuck to my tailgate and wouldn’t pass. So, I waited for the others to pass and then made a left turn into the left lane and then a left onto the side street. This FedEx had parking, staff, and I dropped my packages at 8:46pm and they close at 9pm. Close.

So, now I know where to go. It is only an 11 minute drive. And they told me where an outside drop box is. These days there are very few outside drop boxes. They are mostly in buildings and those buildings close at night. What a pain. Back in 2004 when I was doing signings there were outdoor drop boxes all over town and just as many as USPS boxes…. almost.

So, that was today’s ordeal. Yesterday the juice place I liked closed 15 minutes early and I had to wander all over town looking for fresh spinach and celery juice. Same kind of exasperating day, except that it only took me 20 minutes to find two other high quality options. Why do easy things have to be so difficult?