Do you do signings for people with dogs? I just talked to an ex-military notary who doesn’t like dogs for the same reason I don’t. You don’t know what they are going to do. They might jump on you while you are wearing a $1000 suit and the owners instead of apologizing will say, “Oh, he’s just being friendly — what’s wrong, are you afraid of dogs?” You are helpless and at the mercy of the owners at these signings.

I remember a signing where I asked them to put their growling little doggie behind a locked door. For ten minutes he was behind a door, and then mysteriously the door came open and a vicious predator was antagonizing me from several feet away. The owners were not even slightly sympathetic to how violated I felt and on top of that were rude to me.

Dogs can bite you. Dogs can upset you by being hostile. The friendly dogs can make you feel violated by molesting you which means touching without consent. There is not much that you can do.

But, there are things you can do. Here is my list. However, my list might get you blacklisted or in trouble. But, in my opinion it is good to set your terms and stand your ground if you feel strongly about something because your safety and feelings matter and dog owners don’t seem to get the message from members of the wishy-washy persuasion.

1. Set your terms. No dogs allowed within 20 feet of the notary. They should be behind a locked door at all times.

2. If any dog approaches you, you will not hesitate to leave the signing and they will not get their loan. You will get fired for this, but if you value your dignity, this is the only way you will get it. Many dog owners don’t really understand what “behind a locked door” means. They think that means for a few minutes until they let rover out so he can jump on nonconsenting people like he always does.

3. Pepper spray. You can let people know you carry pepper spray and will spray any dog that comes close to you whether he looks dangerous or not because after all, you don’t know which dog is dangerous until it is too late.

4. Making a scene. This is not a very professional thing to do, but then having you menaced by a dangerous predator isn’t either. If you are being attacked or menaced, professional behavior goes out the window. Taking the upper hand and defending yourself is paramount.

5. Kicking. If a dog attacks you, there is no time to pull a gun, knife or pepper spray. The one effective weapon against smaller dogs is kicking. You might break their face, but when a surprise attack happens in less than half a second, this is your only reliable and effective weapon. Dog owners rarely respect the feelings of those who don’t like dogs.

NOTE
I just had a situation in my apartment. I went out into the hall outside my front door. The neighbor in apartment A opened his door a little. I thought, “Oh God” because the last time that happened I was startled by a vicious dog who abruptly started barking out of control. But, this time two tiny dogs came out of the door at 20 miles per hour and started jumping all over me. I started yelling really loud and kicked one of the dogs. Six hours later I saw the owners in the lobby downstairs. They were holding their dogs, and their dogs once again WERE NOT ON LEASHES. The lady said in her thick Russian accent, “What kind of neighbor are you?” I responded that I am the type of neighbor that doesn’t like being jumped on by your dogs. Keep them on a leash!!! As usual, someone violates me, I react, and then I am treated like the bad guy. Next time I’ll kick ten times as hard and there will be an injury. Enough is enough. I told the woman that next time I’ll report them and I yelled at her very loudly.

Dog owner psychology
Since dog owners are generally reincarnations of dogs, they relate to dogs. I relate to tigers and cats for the same reason — and cats hate dogs. Dogs are normally vile creatures (but, some act nicely), so if someone is a dog lover, they will probably have or accept vile behavior as a result. Humans have a facade of civility, but beyond the veil of etiquette, the vile behavior will eventually show.

Dog owners love dogs, and they normally assume that the rest of the world loves dogs too. They have tremendous trouble understanding that many of us don’t like dogs, feel threatened by dogs and freak out if their dog jumps on us. Even people over fifty can’t understand this. I like Chinese food, but I get it that not everyone likes it. I also know that if somebody doesn’t like Chinese food that doesn’t mean that something is wrong with them. Dog owners will treat you like you are abnormal if you don’t like their ferocious and poorly behaved little friends. It’s insulting.

SUMMARY
If you stand up to irresponsible and inconsiderate dog owners, you might get fired from several jobs, blacklisted, or even fail your background screening if you pulla knife on little mugsy even if mugsy is the bad guy showing his teeth and growling at you from three feet away. On the other hand, if we don’t stand up to these jerks (nice dog owners are not jerks by the way — just for the record) then they can walk all over us for the rest of our lives. My apartment complex used to have a no dog policy. This changed two years ago and I have had incidents almost every day since then. I have been bitten once, and jumped on twice which I consider an attack if it happens suddenly. For me this is woof war. What do you guys think?

I am working so hard, that sometimes I often lose track of how what is going on in the world is going to play out. I feel that the Messiah is going to reveal himself in 2034 (my guru says that is the year. I feel that society as we know it will be wiped out before that. Of course not all of it will be destroyed. God likes to wipe out civilizations with wars, invasions, plagues, diseases, floods, earthquakes.

All of the crazy things happening now have historical precedents in the bible, or were discussed in the Bible. Isaiah discusses a lot of the social realities of today, believe it or not, and that was written about 2700 years ago.

Covid was the appetizer. People were all afraid of Covid but not the economic consequences. Inflation, labor shortages, supply chain backups — who would have guessed. I thought we would have deflation, unemployment problems, and warehouses full of stuff that nobody wanted. Boy was I wrong. I think whenever I predict the future, I should just reverse what I predict, and that will be the accurate representation of the future. Just like the Seinfeld episode — The Opposite.

I feel that in this unpredictable environment, if there is something I really want to do, I better do it now, because I might not be able to later. On the other hand, going to China was my long term goal, and now is by far the worst time to go to China with all of the vaccine nonsense going on.

So, if Covid was the appetizer, then what is the meal? Asteroids, Earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, WW3, starvation? All of these thoughts run through my head. My psychic channeled the angels and they said we would also have volcanoes — good God! If these things happen, they will happen in the next ten years. My guru said that the asteroid will come in 2028 and it will rain fire and God knows if our satellites will survive this. Our banking system is tied to satellites, so I wonder how safe our assets will be.

And if these things happen, what will happen to the Notary industry? If half of Americans die in the next ten years due to the various plagues, will there still be a Notary industry? What will I do? Will I do business with China? How many Chinese will still be alive? 98% of Chinese are atheists. I don’t think God will let too many atheists survive the plagues before the coming of the Messiah or as the Hebrews call him, “Mechiach Ben David.”

I think there will be a remnant of what once was in 2028 as far as the Notary industry goes. There will be a lot fewer people if my prediction is correct. I predict that America will have a population of 140 million in 2028 which is generous compared to what I think God will do to most of the rest of the world, especially places that lack faith in God or decency. Most of Asia will be completely wiped out including most of Israel if I guess correctly. But, some of Israel has to survive otherwise where will the Messiah live. There has to be a logic to my train of thought.

So, I am afraid. Sometimes I want to just scream in terror. I don’t know what to expect. Perhaps I should just not think about it. The death of an industry and a nation — both of which are my home and economic stability.

When my father was in his early 50’s, my mother died. His friends told him that he was getting older — and that if there was anything he really wanted to do, he should do that now. I am giving this advice to myself. I think I want to spend more time with the cactuses in Tucson and work on my health.

I’m not sure what I will do for a living in 2028 if the Notary industry is over. I better learn more Chinese so I can do some trade work. That has always been my dream.