November 2021 - Page 2 of 2 - Notary Blog - Signing Tips, Marketing Tips, General Notary Advice -

Notary Blog – Signing Tips, Marketing Tips, General Notary Advice – Control Panel

November 10, 2021

Top placed listings are like men. The good ones are always taken

Filed under: Marketing Articles — admin @ 8:20 am

Someone asked if there were any spots left in San Diego City area. I explained that high placed listings in San Diego are like men. The good ones are always taken.

On the other hand, I am not taken. Does that mean I am not good, or that nobody recognizes my greatness other than Mrs. Meao. She gets it. Her assessment of value is based on whether you know how to scratch her back in just the right place and in just the right way. If you get her KFC then you will get kisses too. For some reason she liked my orange shampoo. I got 30 kisses (nose kisses) every time I used it. Oh my goodness.

Maybe I should walk around with a sign saying, “High quality man on board.” Or I could wear a suit to show the world how important I am. But, I work at home in my underwear. I don’t need to look important to do my job. Mrs. Meao doesn’t care what I wear just as long as she can sniff it.

On the other hand, sometimes there are high placements in popular areas on 123notary and the market doesn’t demand them at particular moments of time. Sometimes a particular area will be slow for a few years and then booked up for a few years.

Really seasoned notaries are also like good men. They think they are too good to be listed on 123notary in many cases. They have enough regulars that they don’t want new clients. These notaries usually have at least 15,000 signings under their belt and are older. They represent far less than 1% of the notaries on the market, but I bump into them and they let me know how they don’t need me. Gee thanks!


November 9, 2021

A funny thing I said to a Notary

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:12 am

NOTARY: Can I have the 24 icon.

JEREMY: I put it on your listing

NOTARY: Thanks so much

JEREMY: I’ll call you at 3am just to make sure you really mean it.



November 8, 2021

Having a tooth pulled

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:11 am

This is not notary related, but part of my personal life. My tooth #15, which is my upper left last molar had trouble from five years back. It was sensitive to heat when I ate Chinese food. So, I went to the dentist soon after. We did x-rays and he found nothing. He showed me the scans. I think the technology is archaic and is hard to use to find actual problems as you just see a hint of shadows in certain parts of the tooth. Then the tooth started to be a bit sensitive a few years later. So we took more x-rays and found a cavity.

When the dentist started to drill, he saw that the cavity was a lot bigger and deeper than he thought. He hit a nerve, and then put in a temporary filling. He said that he could put in a permanent, but only after the pain went away, otherwise it would be a root canal. The pain got less and less, but did not go completely away for a little more than a year. The next time the dentist saw the tooth he said it would have to be pulled.

So, I procrastinated having it pulled a bit, but finally booked a consultation and an appointment. It took only three minutes to get the tooth out, and it didn’t hurt during the extraction or after the novacaine wore off although I was equipped with Advil in my car and house just in case. Nothing works for dental pain like Advil and you can adjust the dosage based on pain.

So, pulling teeth is not like pulling teeth. The extractor thought it would take up to 45 minutes, but they had the tooth out and bone graft in within 20 minutes. I complimented him on his efficiency and pain free work.

So, I might get an implant or might leave the space vacant. I don’t really need that tooth anyway. I have plenty of other teeth. Glad it didn’t hurt. But, it did hurt nine months ago in Arizona when the evil spirits decided to torment me by targeting my sensitive tooth. What is it with evil spirits anyway?


November 7, 2021

America Last Title

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 8:10 am

Many Notaries worked for First American Title during the Trump administration. But, now that Biden has taken over, America Last Title has had phenomenal growth in market share.

But, I’m not worried. If American banking goes South, we can always rely on the Bank of China to bail us out! I’m tempted to say that we’ll already be eating Xiao-Leng-Bao and Jian-Bing, but I already am, and found a great place in Rowland Heights in a food court. Hand made and Shan-Dong province style. Love it.

Somehow I think that the majority of Americans want America to fail. But, when they can’t afford to eat or pay bills, they will reconsider. By then it will be too late. But, they can still get a job at America Last Title… maybe.


November 6, 2021

Doggie notarizations. Doggy do or doggie don’t?

Filed under: General Articles — admin @ 8:08 am

Do you do signings for people with dogs? I just talked to an ex-military notary who doesn’t like dogs for the same reason I don’t. You don’t know what they are going to do. They might jump on you while you are wearing a $1000 suit and the owners instead of apologizing will say, “Oh, he’s just being friendly — what’s wrong, are you afraid of dogs?” You are helpless and at the mercy of the owners at these signings.

I remember a signing where I asked them to put their growling little doggie behind a locked door. For ten minutes he was behind a door, and then mysteriously the door came open and a vicious predator was antagonizing me from several feet away. The owners were not even slightly sympathetic to how violated I felt and on top of that were rude to me.

Dogs can bite you. Dogs can upset you by being hostile. The friendly dogs can make you feel violated by molesting you which means touching without consent. There is not much that you can do.

But, there are things you can do. Here is my list. However, my list might get you blacklisted or in trouble. But, in my opinion it is good to set your terms and stand your ground if you feel strongly about something because your safety and feelings matter and dog owners don’t seem to get the message from members of the wishy-washy persuasion.

1. Set your terms. No dogs allowed within 20 feet of the notary. They should be behind a locked door at all times.

2. If any dog approaches you, you will not hesitate to leave the signing and they will not get their loan. You will get fired for this, but if you value your dignity, this is the only way you will get it. Many dog owners don’t really understand what “behind a locked door” means. They think that means for a few minutes until they let rover out so he can jump on nonconsenting people like he always does.

3. Pepper spray. You can let people know you carry pepper spray and will spray any dog that comes close to you whether he looks dangerous or not because after all, you don’t know which dog is dangerous until it is too late.

4. Making a scene. This is not a very professional thing to do, but then having you menaced by a dangerous predator isn’t either. If you are being attacked or menaced, professional behavior goes out the window. Taking the upper hand and defending yourself is paramount.

5. Kicking. If a dog attacks you, there is no time to pull a gun, knife or pepper spray. The one effective weapon against smaller dogs is kicking. You might break their face, but when a surprise attack happens in less than half a second, this is your only reliable and effective weapon. Dog owners rarely respect the feelings of those who don’t like dogs.

I just had a situation in my apartment. I went out into the hall outside my front door. The neighbor in apartment A opened his door a little. I thought, “Oh God” because the last time that happened I was startled by a vicious dog who abruptly started barking out of control. But, this time two tiny dogs came out of the door at 20 miles per hour and started jumping all over me. I started yelling really loud and kicked one of the dogs. Six hours later I saw the owners in the lobby downstairs. They were holding their dogs, and their dogs once again WERE NOT ON LEASHES. The lady said in her thick Russian accent, “What kind of neighbor are you?” I responded that I am the type of neighbor that doesn’t like being jumped on by your dogs. Keep them on a leash!!! As usual, someone violates me, I react, and then I am treated like the bad guy. Next time I’ll kick ten times as hard and there will be an injury. Enough is enough. I told the woman that next time I’ll report them and I yelled at her very loudly.

Dog owner psychology
Since dog owners are generally reincarnations of dogs, they relate to dogs. I relate to tigers and cats for the same reason — and cats hate dogs. Dogs are normally vile creatures (but, some act nicely), so if someone is a dog lover, they will probably have or accept vile behavior as a result. Humans have a facade of civility, but beyond the veil of etiquette, the vile behavior will eventually show.

Dog owners love dogs, and they normally assume that the rest of the world loves dogs too. They have tremendous trouble understanding that many of us don’t like dogs, feel threatened by dogs and freak out if their dog jumps on us. Even people over fifty can’t understand this. I like Chinese food, but I get it that not everyone likes it. I also know that if somebody doesn’t like Chinese food that doesn’t mean that something is wrong with them. Dog owners will treat you like you are abnormal if you don’t like their ferocious and poorly behaved little friends. It’s insulting.

If you stand up to irresponsible and inconsiderate dog owners, you might get fired from several jobs, blacklisted, or even fail your background screening if you pulla knife on little mugsy even if mugsy is the bad guy showing his teeth and growling at you from three feet away. On the other hand, if we don’t stand up to these jerks (nice dog owners are not jerks by the way — just for the record) then they can walk all over us for the rest of our lives. My apartment complex used to have a no dog policy. This changed two years ago and I have had incidents almost every day since then. I have been bitten once, and jumped on twice which I consider an attack if it happens suddenly. For me this is woof war. What do you guys think?


November 4, 2021

Notary on 123notary gets his notes professionally written

Filed under: Your Notes Section — admin @ 8:07 am

One of our most serious notaries on our site got his profile notes written by an advertising expert. The expert did a good job, except for a few things.

It is easier to read designations such as certifications, E&O insurance, etc., if written in bullet point format. It is also good to have a long list of packages you are familiar with.

I might not be an expert at notes writing, but I know what content needs to be there. Nice cozy text is attractive to read, but nothing beats cold hard facts, and warm fuzzy information about yourself.

So, yes, have your notes professionally written if you can afford it. But, make sure they understand the basic content that has to be there, because if they are not in our industry, they might not know. Or if they are in our industry, they still might not know. That is why I exist — to keep the record straight and to avoid omitting critical information.


November 2, 2021

Park La Brea has gone to the dogs… literally

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:08 am

Park La Brea Apartment Complex of Los Angeles, CA 90036 used to be a reasonably nice place to live. There were noise issues from time to time over the last 20 years and security was generally sluggish solving these problems. Routine stereo use, subwoofers, children playing loudly near high rises for hours at a time, chirping fire alarms that needed new batteries. We would normally have to bother security several times or up to seven times in the past to get these problems solved and often get the run around. Those were the good old days, at least compared to the current status quo.

In the old days, until about two years ago, there were strict dog policies. The policies went from no dogs allowed period — to being changed to allow a few nicely behaved dogs. I did not read their policies as I don’t have a dog myself although you will find me dogmatic if you read to the end of this article. In the old days the only time we had a problem with dogs is if someone brought a dog in from outside and the dog made lots of noise barking. In those days security would solve that quickly.

Then, around 2019, which incidentally is the same time that in my opinion a very dark and ominous spiritual force became pervasive in my area, dogs were allowed in with few restrictions. More and more dogs came into the complex to live. However, management and security had no protocol to manage the dogs or their poop. Their attitude seems to be — we’ll deal with problems AFTER they happen rather than do preventive maintenance. Except if there are no specifics of what happened after the fact, then we have our hands tied. How useless!

I have already been bitten once, and pounced on several times, menaced, lunged at, barked at, growled at, and had serious screaming matches with dog owners. I don’t blame the dogs, I blame the owners.

So, we have several thousand dogs roaming around, most of whom are relatively new to the area. None of them have been trained from management as to what acceptable behavior is, how long or short their leash should be, or how much of a distance they should keep from those who did not express an interest in being close to their vile pet. Sure this is a nice way to attract new renters in an economy ravaged by an outward migration of people who don’t like the dragonian reaction to Covid-19 in California. But, this lackadaisical attitude towards pestilent pets will surely not be attractive to the long term residents who by definition are not likely to have a dog.

So, here is an itemization of my issues:

Los Angeles County law requires all dogs to be on a leash not to exceed six feet. But, in Park La Brea it is common to see dogs running around freely, sometimes out of sight of their owners. It is also common to see dogs on adjustable length leashes that go up to 15 feet. If you go anywhere near these dogs, you can easily get pounced on or bitten. I pass by 40 dogs per day, and I keep at least six feet distance if possible. If I came closer to these animals I would be having an incident involving yelling at least once per day. Unless you report an individual to security that you can name, or name where they live, security will not be able to do anything — and they never act proactively on their own for this issue unless the dog looks very dangerous.

Management and Security do NOTHING to enforce leash laws or leash length laws which has led to a lot of chaos.

Park La Brea policy and signage disallows pets from entering the activities center park. However, whenever I go, day or night, there are always pets there. Sometimes those pets don’t behave in a manner conducive to me having a relaxing walk.

Dogs that are aggressive are required to wear a muzzle. However, there is no definition of what aggressive is. One security guard thought that killer attack dogs were aggressive and I agreed with him. However, tiny dogs that growl at you if you walk near them are ALSO aggressive and they also bite. Their bite won’t kill you, but it is very disconcerting to be bitten or pounced on by a hostile little canine.

Each security guard I talk to (and there have been about five I have spoken to about the dog issue) has a different understanding about dog policy. Since 20% of the problems that we have in the complex are now dog related, it behooves security management to have all of their staff be intimately knowledgeable about dog policies and probably carry written policies on their person at all times so they can look things up. Many security offices just ride around on bicycles but have no clue how to handle very basic situations. What is the point of even having security if they don’t keep us secure?

My solution to the dog problem is as follows.
(a) Have fewer total dogs
(b) Segregate dogs to living in certain units on the perimeter of the complex, and playing only in certain areas, and walking only on certain sidewalks
(c) Enforce “dogs not allowed” areas with sound technology. Dogs cannot stand high pitched noises that humans would not be aware of. In certain parks, there could be devices making those noises. Additionally, security could write up citations for those who violated the policies.
(d) Signage. It is no surprise that people do not follow leash laws as there are no signs explaining what leash laws or policies are. Those signs should be in your face everywhere. At least people would know what the policies are even if they disobey them.
(e) There are 13 entrances to the activities center park. The backs of all high rises have a back door which constitutes an entrance. And then there are pedestrian entrances on either side of the four high rises that surround the pari. Additionally there is a main entrance which is the 13th entrance (or the first depending on where you started counting. There are three signs in the park which are not lit at night stating that pets are not allowed. If there were large and lit signs on all 13 entrances stating dog policy, there would be a lot fewer people with doggies creating a nuisance.
(f) Poop maintenance. Since I am familiar with the concept of living in harmony with nature, I understand that in nature, dogs poop. Therefore, unless you want to live in a poop infested world, there needs to be a mechanism for picking up the poop as not all dog owners do it for their dog. Management here leaves the poop all over the place and it stays on the grass for weeks. If you walk around at night on the grass, you will step on poop. How attractive. Yet another piece of information to put in the sales literature for prospective renters.

Welcome to Park La Brea — if you like stepping on dog poop that we let sit for weeks on end, this is the place for you! If you walk on the sidewalk you will be antagonized by dogs, but if you keep a safe margin of space between you and the dogs, you will have to walk on the grass which is covered intermittently with poop. Enjoy!

In short, Park La Brea welcomed thousands of dogs with no plan on educating, managing, or disciplining a single one of them. This has led to chaos. There is poop everywhere, barking, dog bites, pouncing incidents, growling, slobbering, happening on a regular basis. If I didn’t know any better, I would think that Biden arranged this whole situation, but it seems that there are others out there as clueless as Biden who follow in his footsteps.


November 1, 2021

Notary Public Day — every Nov 7th

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 7:53 am

Since 1975, every November 7th has been celebrated as Notary Public Day. I have never heard of this day before. I don’t think very many Notaries celebrate it. I’m not sure how you should celebrate it. Perhaps getting a rectangular cake that looks like a frosty Notary seal would be the best way. And you could sing Notary songs about declining backdating requests, 15 year whisky and a 30 year loan, I’m running out of song ideas.

To me that is one more excuse to party. But, would Notaries get together with other Notaries (competition) and celebrate, or get together with friends and describe their profession and listen to all of their lame questions? Hmm. Food for thought.

The date of November 7 was chosen as Notary Public Day in recognition of the date that America’s first notary, Thomas Fugill, was commissioned. Fugill’s appointment by the Colony of New Haven happened on October 25, 1639 (Julian calendar), November 7 on the Gregorian calendar now in use. So, Fugill’s Notary commission was not in Fugility nor was it in futility!

I’ll contact my local cake makers. We really need to make a thing out of this. We should contact calendar makers to get them to put it in the calendar as it trumps some of their other inconsequential holidays like Canadian Thanksgiving (observed.)

« Newer Posts