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February 5, 2011

The Signing from Heaven

Filed under: Ken Edelstein,Ultra-Popular — Tags: , , — admin @ 8:10 am

The Signing from Heaven

The call comes in when you have nothing on your calendar. It’s for signing about 5 miles from your home. You notice that it’s from a very highly rated title company that you have been trying to link with for years. They are very exclusive about who they hire. They have several highly pro-notary policies. They always pay their notaries public in full, as long as you did not make any errors. It does not matter if it “closes” or not. If the borrower refuses to sign or rescinds; they consider only the work that you did. Their standard pay is $150 and the docs are always shipped to you at least 3 days prior to the signing date. The appointment is usually set 5 days prior.

When the docs arrive, (they ship them to you), you examine them closely. You notice that they took the time to accurately fill in the venue section with both the correct state and county where the signing will take place. There is no lengthy “Statement of Information”; only a request for a copy the signer’s IDs – and the borrowers are requested to sign the photocopy of their ID. The package is sent in a single PDF which includes the return airbill. The date of the signing has been set; however you are requested to arrange with the borrower a mutually convenient time for the actual signing. They respect and trust their notaries public and your check is included in the shipment.

You arrive at the signing location, with a nearby parking spot; to be greeted warmly. After introductions, they serve coffee and cookies on a spacious and well lighted table. They confirm that they have previously received and reviewed their “borrower copy” directly from the title company. They mention a mistake was found and provide you with a sealed FedEx envelope that they say contains, directly from title (the shipper’s address), a new HUD; to replace the one you brought. They inform you that you will also find in the envelope a note from the loan officer authorizing the document “swap”. You notice on the table the borrowers have prepared copies of their driver’s licenses and have placed the originals on top of the photocopies.

As you examine the IDs you notice that there are no sounds in the room. The TV is off, there are no children anywhere in sight; nor are any animals in the room. The borrowers tell you they have examined the entire package, and with the sole exception of needing a new HUD; they are ready to sign. Moreso, they request that you only present to them documents that need signatures, and that you “turn the page” on documents that do not need any signatures. When you reach the first page to be signed you notice that the spelling on the IDs exactly matches the spelling on the documents from the lending institution and title / escrow.

Processing the 87 page document set proceeds at a rapid pace. They sign using a neat clear full signature exactly as printed “under the line”. The borrowers have no questions, but do mention that they allocated a full hour to sign the documents. Half way thru the documents you are brought a refill of very excellent coffee, and a few more cookies. Towards the end of the document set the borrowers compliment you on your punctuality and mention their desire to send a complimentary letter on your behalf. After all the documents are signed, and the oath given; they mention a future need for a traveling notary and request your card. They notice the FedEx airbill/envelope and express appreciation that you will be handling the actual shipping of the package back for them.

Smiles and handshakes are followed by a last piece of cookie and final sip of that superb coffee.

Dear reader of this post regarding “The Signing from Heaven”;

The last line of this post can be found in a song by The “Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band” specifically, the song title is: “I’m The Urban Spaceman”. Please find the lyrics – you will have to do a bit of hunting, to find the last 3 words of my post regarding “The Signing from Heaven”; which are also the last 3 words of that song.

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Borrowers and their filthy homes

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February 2, 2011

Interesting and uncommon notary acts

Filed under: (5) State specific,Notary Acts & Certificates,Popular Overall 2011 — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , — admin @ 8:30 am

Notary Acts
 
There are various types of notarial acts, and the rules and types of acts vary from state to state.  In this blog entry, I’ll go over all of the types of notary acts that I can find information about, and introduce some of the points that differ from state to state.  The states associated with each specific act are NOT necessarily the ONLY states associated with those acts, but are the state(s) that we are referencing.
 
Acknowledgment
An acknowledgment is the most common notary act and accounts for roughly 80% of all notarizations with Jurats being in second place.  Many states allow notaries to charge a maximum fee per notarized signature, while Florida’s fees are based on how many times you affix your stamp when executing an acknowledgment.
 
Affirmation
An affirmation is a type of Oath where there is no mention of a higher power (God).
 
Attesting to a Document’s Validity (AR)
This is a notary act that is peculiar to Arkansas.  I don’t recall seeing this as a possible notary act in any other state. Please visit our Arkansas Notary page for more information.
 
Authentication, Apostilles, and Magistracies (General)
These are general notary public procedures common to most states. However, less than 1% of notaries know how to do such notary acts, and you normally have to contact your state notary public division to learn the rules.  The process of getting one of these generally takes a minimum of a few days, and the price is usually high.
 
Certified Copies (WA)(CA)
Some states allow Certified copies of powers of attorney such as California.   Other states often allow a notary to make certified copies of any type of document.  New York doesn’t allow any type of certified copies. The type of documents that a notary may certify copies of vary from state to state.  Washington allows a notary to charge $10 per certified copy of any document for example.
 
Copies of Journal Entries
California notary law allows a small fee of 30 cents per entry for notaries to charge if a member of the public needs a copy of a specific journal entry.  The notary should be careful to make sure that all other transactions recorded in the journal do not show up on the photocopy sent to the individual making the inquiry to protect people’s privacy.
 
Depositions – Certifying Depositions (AR)
Most states use the term, “Take a deposition” while Arkansas allows notaries to certify a Deposition.  Some states allow a fee for the Deposition and then another fee for each oath to each witness.  Rules vary from state to state.
 
Document Copy Charges (CO)
Colorado notary law allows a notary to make copies of documents and charge for this act.  This act ensures that the copied document is a real copy and not a different document or one that is slightly altered.  If you are in another state that doesn’t have this type of notary act, its still advisable to witness the photocopying of documents that are to be certified as copies. Its also not a bad idea to make a notation on the document that you witnessed it being photocopied even though thats not an official act outside of Colorado that we are aware of.
 
e-Notarizations
Rules for e-notarizations differ from state to state.  The main point is to use an electronic journal to record transactions and for the documents to be online or electronic documents.  e-signings are signings where some of the documents are online while others are printed out.  A regular journal is used when doing an e-signing although the signature on the document is electronic.
 
Jurat
This is the second most popular notary act.  A Jurat requires the signer to sign the document before the notary and to take an Oath before the notary as well regarding the document or verbiage.  Several years ago, Jurats did not require identification in many states, but as of 2011, almost all states require the signer / affiant to be positively identified for this notary act.
 
Marine Protest (RI)
Rhode Island is the only state we have seen to have a separate fee for a marine Protest.  A Protest is an act where
someone Protests non-payment of a bill.  A Marine protest or sea protest is a statement where a captain or officer can include relevant details about the ship, voyage, cargo, drafts, date of departure, date of arrival in next port. This type of act is used if unfavorable weather conditions were encountered.  The Marine protest will protect the vessel and their owners from further claims brought forward by charterers, shippers, and cargo receivers.
 
Non-Certified Copies (VA)
Virginia allows for notaries to make copies that are not certified.  A non-certified copy if for information only and is not accepted for legal purposes such as school enrollment or applying for a drivers license or passport.
 
Oath
Most if not all states allow notaries to take Oaths.  An Oath is a solemn promise or statement where the affiant swears that they are telling the truth.
 
Photocopying & Supervising Photocopying (AR)
In Arkansas, a notary can get paid to photocopy documents or supervise the photocopy of documents. 
 
Proof of Execution
This notary act requires a subscribing witness who sees the principal sign a document.  The subscribing witness appears before the notary public.  This act is the only notary act where the actual signer doesn’t appear before the notary.
 
Protest
This type of notary act is where an individual protests the nonacceptance or non-payment of money owed.
 
Safe Deposit Openings (NY)
Here is a unique notary act only allowed in New York and Florida that we are aware of.  The notary must witness the opening of a safe deposit box and record the contents of the box in a certificate, but not in their journal.  Please click on the link to read the details.
 
Taking a Renunciation of dower or Inheritance (SC)
Please see the South Carolina notary division’s website for details on this unique notary act.
 
Verification – Taking a verification upon an Oath or Affirmation (DE)(PA)
Please consult the Delaware or Pennsylvania’s notary division website for more information on this unique act.
 
Weddings (ME), (SC), (FL)
Notaries in Maine, South Carolina, and Florida can solemnize weddings.  Notaries need to be familiar with the procedure and proper wedding etiquette to provide this type of service.
 
Witnessing an Absentee Ballot (FL)
Notaries are not allowed to charge for this notary act in Florida, or California. 
 
Witnessing or Attesting to a Signature (DE)
Attesting to a signature simply means witnessing a signature, and then signing your own name to document that fact that you witnessed a signature.  Delaware is one state of many that considers being a witness an official notary act.

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February 1, 2011

How to get paid by out of biz signing companies!

Filed under: Loan Signing 101,Popular on Linked In,Tips for Getting Paid — Tags: , , — admin @ 8:55 am

Many notaries ask us how they can get paid by signing companies. Dealing with signing companies can be tricky. But, there are some basic rules of thumb you need to understand.

(1) You need to screen companies before you work for them.
That way you avoid the really bad ones and cut your losses. No notary gets paid 100% of the time, but if you avoid bad companies, you will raise your percentage for how often you get paid. Notary Rotary and 123notary have excellent resources in our lists of signing companies and the forum. You can read the gossip about hundreds of companies before you get involved. Stick you toe in before you jump if you don’t want to get in trouble!

(2) Don’t give too much credit to companies
Notaries get in trouble when they let a company rack up a huge bill. You need to keep track of the payment regularity for each company who you work for. If someone is delinquent on even one payment, don’t work for them until they clear that up. You need to keep your personal records for all signing companies on your person at all times just in case they call offering you work. I wouldn’t offer more than $400 credit to companies with a good rating on our list of signing companies. Don’t offer more than $200 credit to others who are either not ranked, or have mediocre rankings. If they want more work from you, they can paypal you funds up front or pay faster. No money, no honey!

(3) Visit our resources page.
There is a “how to make sure you get paid” page in our resources page. In that page there is a letter from hell which is a template for a demand letter. It works most of the time. But, if the company is out of business, even our demand letter might not work. Don’t get strung along to that point. Settle your finances quickly so that you don’t end up with a company owing you $3000 who is out of business. Keep track, and stay out of trouble.
http://www.123notary.com/notary-public.asp

(4) Your attitude makes a big difference
When I talk to notaries who have trouble getting paid, I notice a few things. First of all, all notaries have trouble getting paid from time to time. But, if a company is low on funds and can only pay a few of the notaries they owe money to, they will pay the ones they intend on using in the future. If you are a bad notary, or are a headache to deal with, you are LESS likely to get paid. Keep that in mind. Be pleasant and professional. One guy who didn’t get paid interrupted me each sentence. I couldn’t finish my thought without being interrupted. No wonder he didn’t get paid. The signing company must have gotten complaints about him. That is not a legitimate excuse not to pay him, but signing companies typically don’t care about what is legitimate or not! They do what they feel like.

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January 29, 2011

Two notaries assigned the same job?

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular Overall 2011,Posts With Many Comments — Tags: , , , — admin @ 7:16 am

Two notaries assigned the same job?
 
There I was, a California notary public in Tustin, CA. I had driven down from Los Angeles to sign a loan for a nice couple in Orange County, California. We were signing away, when lo and behold:  The notary showed up.  He asked, “Who are you?”.  I then proclaimed, “I am the notary”.  Then, he said, “That’s impossible, I’m the notary!”.  “No you’re not!”.  “Yes I am”.  “Am NOT!”. “AM TOO!…”  Okay, let’s be honest, the “am not am too” part never happened.  I’m embelleshing this signing agent dialogue. The couple was just staring in confusion.  The wife was displaying the exact same mannerisms as a cat watching a dangling string.  He head rotated to the left and looked at me, then head rotated to the right and looked at the other notary, then back at me, and back at him…. Hmmm.  What is going on?
 
The Signing company hired two notaries?
How could they! After all of my hard work, they would have the gaul to… Oh… wait a minute, let me call them and straighten the whole thing out. 
 
Ring Ring…..
 
Me – Hello, may I speak to Mary please, this is Jeremy your California notary for the Anderson Signing in Tustin. 
Mary – Hi, this is Mary! 
Me – Hi, Mary, it seems that you hired two notaries for the same job. 
Mary – What? We would never do that
Me – Odd, because as we speak, there is another notary here.  Or, should I say, “A Notarial Triangle”
Mary – Hmmm… Let me call the Title company.
………… ten minutes later
Mary – I found out what happened
Me – Please do tell?
Mary – The title company hired two signing companies to handle this California notary job, and the OTHER signing company sent that OTHER California notary out.
Me – Mmmm.  So, which signing company was SUPPOSED to be responsible for the job.
Mary – We are.  The title company cancelled with the other signing company, but apparantly, they didn’t cancel with the notary.
Me – Oh, no they didn’t!!!
Mary – Oh, yes they did.
Me – This has never happened in my career to date.  And I hope it never happens again. Just make sure that I’m the one who gets paid, although the other one should get a travel fee, don’t you agree?
Mary – Thats between him and the OTHER signing company.
Me – I KNEW there had to be another signing company. I could just tell from the way he was looking at me.
 
So, jokes aside, the other notary left, we finished the signing.  Into the UPS box it went, and off I went on my merry way out of what we affectionally call, “The OC”, and back up the 5 Freeway, or is it the 405 — its been so long I can’t even remember, through Anaheim, Downey, Commerce, and back to Los Angeles where I logged in my transaction and faxed a bill to the signing company.
 
The End!

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January 28, 2011

Tomorrow’s Notary Publics

Filed under: Andy Cowan,Popular on Twitter 2011 — Tags: , , , , — admin @ 10:59 pm

no·ta·ry public

noun \ˈnō-tə-rē-\
plural notaries public

————————————

The kids who grow up to become doctors or lawyers have it easy. Oh sure, they have to get into med school or law school. They have to avoid getting thrown out of med school or law school. Physicians have to breathe the germs of sick people. Lawyers have to address curmudgeons as “Your honor” if the curmudgeon is wearing a robe. (Unless it’s Hugh Hefner wearing a robe.) But all of this is a cakewalk compared to growing up to become a notary public. You can study pre-law or pre-med. Pre-notary public? Dream on.

Kids who become doctors or lawyers are conditioned to become doctors or lawyers. Their parents and teachers dangle those career carrots from an early age, encouraging any signs of medical or legal predispositions. What are the signs of a budding notary public prodigy?

“Hello, class. I’m your teacher, Ms. Morrison.”

As Ms. Morrison writes her name on the board, all of her students slavishly continue to zone in on their handheld devices, except for one pimply kid she notices “witnessing” her signature.

“Young man, have you ever thought of becoming a notary public? You just might have the right stuff!”

A teacher’s seal of approval one day. A notary public’s seal of approval years later.

Doctors and lawyers have role models: Doogie Howser … Dr. Oz … Dr. Dre … Perry Mason. OJ’s lawyers. (Not the ones who got him off for murder. The ones who got him locked up for sports memorabilia.) Most notaries are forbidden from offering legal advice or preparing legal documents. Remember L.A. Law? Remember L.A. Notary Public? Me neither.

“Tonight, on L.A. Notary Public, Ted affixes a certificate!”

Wait… sounds likes last week’s L.A. Notary Public. What do you expect? He’s a notary public!

Kids want to grow up to become firemen … astronauts … rock stars… glorified karaoke contestants who follow in the footsteps of American Idol, Carrie Underwood, and dodge the footsteps of American idle, Lee DeWyze. Remember Lee? Me neither.

As The Lone Ranger rides again, kids continue to play “cowboys and Indians.” No child on record has been caught playing “notary publics and document holders.”

Presuming notary publics reproduce future generations of notary publics, how can we help ensure their not so livelihoods latch onto enough sex appeal to generate the action required to reproduce future generations? Dim the lights…

“I’m Ryan Seacrest… and this… is American Notary Public!”

Randy Jackson: “Yo, what’s your name?”

Bill Dudley: “Bill Dudley.”

Randy Jackson: “Are you the next American Notary Public?”

Bill Dudley: “Definitely.”

Randy Jackson: “Okay, dawg, do your thing.”

Bill Dudley: “Can I have your autograph?”

Randy hands Bill a piece of paper with his autograph. Bill stamps said piece of paper.

Randy Jackson: “Bill Dudley’s in it to win it!”

*

Andy Cowan is an award-winning writer, producer and performer, whose credits include “Cheers,” “Seinfeld” and “3rd Rock From the Sun.” He can be reached through his website, http://upanddownguys.com

Tweets:
(1) You can study pre-law or pre-med. Pre-notary public? Dream on.
(2) What are the signs of a budding notary public prodigy?
(3) “Young man, have you ever thought of becoming a notary public? You just might have the right stuff!”
(4) Kids play “cowboys and Indians.” No child on record has been caught playing “notary publics and document holders.”

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http://blog.123notary.com/?p=16038

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Notary Airport

Filed under: General Stories,Popular on Facebook (shares),Popular on Linked In — Tags: , , , , — admin @ 11:55 am

NOTARY: One day there will be a Notary Airport

SAM: When pigs can fly.

NOTARY: Well actually, it will be seals flying. The airplanes will look like giant seals, whiskers and all.

SAM: Maybe they should make a Notary submarine that looks like a seal instead of a flying seal.

NOTARY: The good part is that when Notarizations are done on the plane, the prices will be sky high!

SAM: Yeah, and if you notarize in the air, you can join the Notary mile high club.

NOTARY: Yes, but wait until you find out what the airport layout will look like….

The terminals will be shaped like Notary seals. Each terminal will have a coffee house and bar with a Notary bartender. The newpaper store will sell NNA’s newsletter in addition to the Wall Street Journal. The parking lot will have a special section for Notaries that is closest to where the shuttle picks you up. And when you go to check in your bags, they make you sign the journal and thumbprint. How cool is that?

Scene from aiport security.

OFFICER: Sir, please remove any metal objects from your pockets and step forward slowly.

SAM: Okay… should I take off my belt too?

OFFICER: Just wait for us to put on the saxophone music before you do that please sir.

SAM: Got it.

OFFICER: Our scanner found a metal object in your bag that resembles an embosser?

SAM: Is that a problem, officer?

OFFICER: Well, not necessarily. Is this a registered embosser?

SAM: Does it need to be?

OFFICER: Step to the side sir.

SAM: Uh-oh.

OFFICER: I’m going to need to pat you down. Please stand still.

SAM: Wow, you’re good at that.

OFFICER: I know… I get that a lot. I used to be a Priest for 30 years, a ballet teacher for 3 years, plus I worked in the airport for 4 years.

SAM: Oh, it all adds up now. Now I know why that comes so naturally to you. The embosser was authorized by my state. I have the paperwork at home.

OFFICER: Great. Let me just check your commission number on our computer system… Uh huh. Okay, no unauthorized used on our database. The waiting areas are in front of you or have a drink at the flying embosser. Just don’t use your embosser under the influence of alcohol or heavy medication per airport regulations. If you get bored in the waiting room, you can read Notary Handbooks from all 50 states plus DC.

SAM: I’ll get bored, but not that bored. Thanks.

OFFICER: And may God bless you — if there is a God.

SAM: Some Priest you are/were.

OFFICER: Well, I stopped being a Priest because I stopped believing in God.

SAM: Hmm. Well, I stopped being a Mortgage Broker in 2009 because I lost interest.

OFFICER: Forgive me father for I have rescinded — that was a good one! I’m just kidding, I still believe in God, I quit the church to run for the senate because things at the church got too — political.

SAM: Gotcha!

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January 27, 2011

You know you’re a notary when…

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Humorous Posts,Popular on Linked In — Tags: , , , , , — admin @ 10:52 am

You know you’re a Notary Public when…

(1) You go to a bar and ID the bartender before he has a chance to ID you.
(2) You ID every girl you date even when their high school yearbook is over 18
(3) You like Oreo cookies because they’re embossed.
(4) Your favorite ice cream is from Jen & Sherry’s, Rescinded Rum Raisin
(5) You background screen your golf buddies before going out into the course with them
(6) You have a bumper sticker that says “I’d rather be signing”
(7) You spend so much time with your GPS that you make Siri sign a prenup.
(8) You spend so much time with your GPS that you know all of its most intimate pieces of information such as favorite foods, birthdays, favorite roads, and mother’s maiden name.
(9) You become famous, people ask for your autograph and you’d rather have theirs
(10) Your mailbox and inbox are cluttered by twelve different notary organizations.
(11) Your Jewish son meets a nice Jewish girl and you ask, “Is she a notary?”
(12) Your favorite seafood is squid because it never needs an ink refill.
(13) When you get your parking validated, you rip the stamp out of the person’s hands so you can stamp it yourself.
(14) You comment, “Gee, your hairstyle doesn’t match your ID,” when you meet someone at a bar.
(15) You compliment people on their signatures — “Gee, that’s a lovely cursive.”
(16) You take pawprints of the animals in the neighborhood just in case they get lost.
(17) You spend your spare time last weekend writing a letter to the State of Nevada criticizing them for allowing drivers licenses to be valid for 20 years.
(18) When you go to court (for whatever reason) you correct the bailiff’s Oath wording.
(19) You wear a T-shirt saying, “I’m not your husband’s mistress, I’m the Notary!”
(20) You have an NNA towel that you take to the beach (if such a thing exists)
(21) All guests entering your house must personally appear before you and sign the journal, put a date and time, plus reason for entry.
(22) Your favorite California wine is the Notary Public Cabernet – You’d swear under oath it’s the best vino there is if you weren’t busy slurring your notary verbiage
(23) When your friend asked you, “Can I turn left here?” You respond, “I am not an Attorney and may not answer legal questions or perform loan signings in the state of Georgia. I am just a Notary.”
(24) When you go to cocktail parties and people ask what you do you respond, “Next question.”
(25) When you go to a bar, you always order their signature drinks.
(26) When someone asks how old your young children are, instead of measuring their age in weeks or months, you measure it in fractions of a commission. Oh this one? Judy? Yeah, we got her during my 2nd commission. But, Fred over here we’ve had since before I was commissioned at all. He must be getting old now.
(27) You ask your Jewish friends if they need their kid’s Bar-Mitzvahs Notarized.
(28) If your friend invites you to a party and then calls you to change the venue, you offer to initial the change.
(29) You have a bumper sticker saying — Warning, I brake for Mortgage Brokers.
(30) You have another bumper sticker saying — Notary on Board
(31) You have a happy hour menu with special prices for Jurats.
(32) Your favorite Chinese restaurant has fortune cookies that read — He who backdate live long life, but have short commission.
(33) You have a special credit card that gives double miles if you stay at The Notary Hotel
(34) When you see a girl with a nice tan, you comment that she must have used a lot of toner to get that look.
(35) When you go out for steak you only get certified Angus steak.
(36) When charitable organizations send you 500 labels with your home address on it, you throw them out as you prefer to use a customized stamp.
(36) Your favorite movie was — Honey, I Notarized the Kids.

.

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You know you’re a good Notary when you…
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14912

30 point quiz: Jeopardy
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=14557

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How do you get reviews if you have multiple listings?

Filed under: Popular on Linked In,Reviews — admin @ 10:39 am

When people want additional areas on 123notary, there are different ways to sell it to them. I can put another area on their basic listing and give them high placement in that other area. Or, I can sell them a completely new n# in another county. The people who get a separate listing tend to renew these spots more in the long run. However, they get mad because the reviews from the original listing do not show up. So, what is the solution?

As I am looking for unique content on each listing, I want reviews to be organic to each listing. When people copy the reviews from one listing to another, the dates show up from the date they did the copying. Having five reviews from December 14, 2015 looks very cheesy. So, I allow the Notary to copy their favorite review. And I will copy another review on another day. That way they can start with two reviews that do not show up on the same day. Additionally, since these reviews are the best two out of how ever many they have, those reviews will carry a lot of weight.

A well written relatively current review is worth a lot more to the users than some dried up review from 2012. People will think you are washed out if you only have old reviews. So, having two new reviews is worth a lot. Then, you can get some new organic reviews on top of that. You only really need six reviews to do well on 123notary. After six, the return is very marginal if any.

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Mobile Office: Will it void your warranty?

Filed under: Business Tips,Popular on Twitter 2011 — admin @ 10:30 am

An important upgrade to make to your mobile notary service is having a mobile office, an office in your car. This means, at the very least, having a laser printer wired into the car; for some, it can mean a laptop and a scanner as well. It is expensive to keep going home to get documents printed, and our most successful notaries these days have a mobile office. You can write it off as a business expense (IRS Publication 463), and it will help you save time and make a great impression on the borrowers. We had a forum discussion about having a mobile office in 2010 http://www.123notary.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2770 and in 2011:

Blog posts about mobile offices
http://blog.123notary.com/?tag=mobile-offices

But, here is some more information to consider.

Recently, GM dealers told a mobile notary that to wire a laser printer into the car will void the warranty. It might cause a power train failure. Wiring in a laptop or a printer could void the power train warranty by altering the engine, and a mobile office is certainly a drain on the power of the vehicle. I assume that is why one of the notaries we spoke to in 2011 described the need for an extra-powerful alternator and battery, and why he puts the laptop on battery only while printing documents.

HOWEVER, another mobile notary who has a Dodge and an extensive mobile office just told us that to avoid the warranty issue, you have to install a second battery and a second alternator– which should actually not cost you more than $150, and does not void the warranty. Get information from a shop that installs car stereos, for example, says the notary who owns a Dodge. You can also google “How to install a mobile office in your car.”

Toyota, however, has said nothing official about such installations voiding the car’s warranty– and another mobile notary just went ahead and installed a printer and laptop through a friend who works on cars. The difference is–his Toyota is out of warranty anyway.

So if your vehicle is still under warranty and you plan on installing a mobile office–check with your dealership or with corporate for the company that makes your vehicle.

Or, you could just get a custom vehicle. Just ogle these new vehicles– made for anyone who wants the ultimate mobile office: http://www.automotto.com/entry/10-cars-that-bring-your-office-to-wheels/

Tweets:
(1) Having a mobile office in your vehicle could cause a power train failure
(2) You need a 2nd battery in your car to handle a mobile office w/o warranty issues

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Notarization on the Steve Harvey Show

Filed under: Best Humorous Posts,Popular on Linked In,Sit-Coms — Tags: , , , , — admin @ 6:31 am

STEVE: I have a surprise for you. Do you know why we invited you here today?

CAROL: I have no idea, honestly no idea.

STEVE: Well, I’ll give you a hint. Have you ever had anything notarized?

CAROL: No, I can’t think of anything that I’ve ever had notarized.

STEVE: Well think harder. Think fifteen years ago.

CAROL: Hmmm. I’m coming up with a blank.

STEVE: Well, you might not remember this notary, but he remembers you. And he has something of yours that you gave him when he last saw you back in 1994.

CAROL: 1994?

STEVE: Here he is!

CAROL: Oh my god, Oh my god! Randy. I remember you, but forgot that you were a Notary. And that’s the necklace I gave you. I remember it all now!

STEVE: Well, brace yourself. You better sit down. Because Randy has something that he wants to ask you!

CAROL: Oh my god. I can’t believe this is happening. Yes Randy. What did you want to ask me.

RANDY: Carol, I met you almost twenty years ago, and I have never forgotten you. You have been on my mind ever since. I realized that when we talked, back in 1994 the conversation was so meaningful. But, there’s one thing that has been on my mind that I have been needing to ask you ever since.

CAROL: One thing? Sure, ask anything you want. I just am not prepared for what you might ask.

RANDY: Carol… will you…ummm… how can I put this. Remember the notarization I did for you back in 1994. My journal said that it was for an Affidavit of Occupancy.

CAROL. Oh yeah, now I remember. That was to lock in a particular interest rate on that house.

RANDY: Well, we got so wrapped up in conversation that I forgot to ask you one thing. Carol, will you… um… will you complete the Oath that I forgot to ask you for that Affidavit of Occupancy? I kept a copy of that document all these years with the necklace you gave me.

CAROL: Oh my god, you still have that?

RANDY: Please raise your right hand. Do you solemnly swear that the information in this Affidavit of Occupancy are true and correct and that you agree to the conditions in the document?

CAROL: I do.

RANDY: I’m so relieved. Because, in my notary career, I never violated notary law, not even once. But, I realized that failing to administer an Oath for a Jurat on an Affidavit is grounds for suspension, termination, or revocation of your notary license. I’m so glad that I administered that Oath, and got it out of my system.

CAROL: You came all the way to have me on TV, just for that?

RANDY: Oh, and one more thing.

CAROL: Yes?

RANDY: Carol…. will you marry me?

CAROL: Oh my god! Yes I will, well, at least we can start dating. But, on one condition.

STEVE: The sister has conditions? I gotta hear this!

RANDY: Sure, that’s fine

CAROL: I will need a notary statement stating that you want to date me and that you will take me out for penne arrabiata at Carmino’s Italian Restaurant.

RANDY: That’s a little odd. Would you like the notarization to be a Jurat, Acknowledged signature, Protest, or an Oath.

CAROL: I’d prefer a Jurat with an accompanying Oath. And yes, I’ll keep a copy of that document to show you in 2034!

STEVE: This is amazing. I’ve never seen anything like this in my career. Just one question for Randy.

RANDY: Ask away!

STEVE: Randy, I’ve never been notarized, ever. I just want to know what it is like being notarized, just to get it out of my system. Can you notarize me?

RANDY: On camera? The camera adds 10 pounds to any signature you know.

STEVE: That’s okay. So, what’s the first step.

RANDY: I’ll need to see some ID sir!

STEVE: What, you don’t know me? I’m Steve Harvey — I’m famous. You don’t need to ID ME!

RANDY: Well, actually it is a legal requirement here.

STEVE: Oh allright. I was just playing with you. Here’s my ID. Which one you want. I got five of them.

RANDY: Your driver’s license will work.

STEVE: Allright, now what do I gotta do. Do you want me to sign something?

RANDY: If you don’t have a document, you could have something typed up.

STEVE: Well what do you want it to say?

RANDY: It can say anything you want just as long as you sign it.

STEVE: Hmmm, I’m gonna have to think about that. (he looks to the left, looks up, and looks around) I thought about it and I know what I want to say now.

RANDY: What is it?

STEVE: I wanna say, I’m Steve Harvey, and I’m smooth like butter.

RANDY: We can do that. Just sign the journal here. (staff hands him the typed up paper) Sign the document here. I’ll attach an Acknowledgment certificate, stamp it… we’re done!

STEVE: That’s it? That was easy. I didn’t feel a thing.

RANDY: It’s a fairly standard act.

STEVE: Well, I want to wish you and Carol the best of luck on your first date. In fact, we are going to pay the first $200 of your date’s expenses for dinner for two at Maggiano’s in Los Angeles. That is the fanciest, most amazing Italian restaurant anywhere in California. I love that place! Then, get this — are you ready? You can have another $200 for your next date and a gift certificate for two to see a 3d movie or movie of your choice at IMAX in Universal Studios.

CAROL: Wow Steve. This is the best day of my life. I never expected any of this.

RANDY: Thanks Steve. I don’t know how to thank you.

STEVE: Well, you can thank me with a notarized statement if you really want to know how to get to the bottom of my heart!

.

You might also like:

Yes, it’s the Notary Dating Show
http://blog.123notary.com/?p=15312

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