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November 7, 2021

America Last Title

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 8:10 am

Many Notaries worked for First American Title during the Trump administration. But, now that Biden has taken over, America Last Title has had phenomenal growth in market share.

But, I’m not worried. If American banking goes South, we can always rely on the Bank of China to bail us out! I’m tempted to say that we’ll already be eating Xiao-Leng-Bao and Jian-Bing, but I already am, and found a great place in Rowland Heights in a food court. Hand made and Shan-Dong province style. Love it.

Somehow I think that the majority of Americans want America to fail. But, when they can’t afford to eat or pay bills, they will reconsider. By then it will be too late. But, they can still get a job at America Last Title… maybe.

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November 6, 2021

Doggie notarizations. Doggy do or doggie don’t?

Filed under: General Articles — admin @ 8:08 am

Do you do signings for people with dogs? I just talked to an ex-military notary who doesn’t like dogs for the same reason I don’t. You don’t know what they are going to do. They might jump on you while you are wearing a $1000 suit and the owners instead of apologizing will say, “Oh, he’s just being friendly — what’s wrong, are you afraid of dogs?” You are helpless and at the mercy of the owners at these signings.

I remember a signing where I asked them to put their growling little doggie behind a locked door. For ten minutes he was behind a door, and then mysteriously the door came open and a vicious predator was antagonizing me from several feet away. The owners were not even slightly sympathetic to how violated I felt and on top of that were rude to me.

Dogs can bite you. Dogs can upset you by being hostile. The friendly dogs can make you feel violated by molesting you which means touching without consent. There is not much that you can do.

But, there are things you can do. Here is my list. However, my list might get you blacklisted or in trouble. But, in my opinion it is good to set your terms and stand your ground if you feel strongly about something because your safety and feelings matter and dog owners don’t seem to get the message from members of the wishy-washy persuasion.

1. Set your terms. No dogs allowed within 20 feet of the notary. They should be behind a locked door at all times.

2. If any dog approaches you, you will not hesitate to leave the signing and they will not get their loan. You will get fired for this, but if you value your dignity, this is the only way you will get it. Many dog owners don’t really understand what “behind a locked door” means. They think that means for a few minutes until they let rover out so he can jump on nonconsenting people like he always does.

3. Pepper spray. You can let people know you carry pepper spray and will spray any dog that comes close to you whether he looks dangerous or not because after all, you don’t know which dog is dangerous until it is too late.

4. Making a scene. This is not a very professional thing to do, but then having you menaced by a dangerous predator isn’t either. If you are being attacked or menaced, professional behavior goes out the window. Taking the upper hand and defending yourself is paramount.

5. Kicking. If a dog attacks you, there is no time to pull a gun, knife or pepper spray. The one effective weapon against smaller dogs is kicking. You might break their face, but when a surprise attack happens in less than half a second, this is your only reliable and effective weapon. Dog owners rarely respect the feelings of those who don’t like dogs.

NOTE
I just had a situation in my apartment. I went out into the hall outside my front door. The neighbor in apartment A opened his door a little. I thought, “Oh God” because the last time that happened I was startled by a vicious dog who abruptly started barking out of control. But, this time two tiny dogs came out of the door at 20 miles per hour and started jumping all over me. I started yelling really loud and kicked one of the dogs. Six hours later I saw the owners in the lobby downstairs. They were holding their dogs, and their dogs once again WERE NOT ON LEASHES. The lady said in her thick Russian accent, “What kind of neighbor are you?” I responded that I am the type of neighbor that doesn’t like being jumped on by your dogs. Keep them on a leash!!! As usual, someone violates me, I react, and then I am treated like the bad guy. Next time I’ll kick ten times as hard and there will be an injury. Enough is enough. I told the woman that next time I’ll report them and I yelled at her very loudly.

Dog owner psychology
Since dog owners are generally reincarnations of dogs, they relate to dogs. I relate to tigers and cats for the same reason — and cats hate dogs. Dogs are normally vile creatures (but, some act nicely), so if someone is a dog lover, they will probably have or accept vile behavior as a result. Humans have a facade of civility, but beyond the veil of etiquette, the vile behavior will eventually show.

Dog owners love dogs, and they normally assume that the rest of the world loves dogs too. They have tremendous trouble understanding that many of us don’t like dogs, feel threatened by dogs and freak out if their dog jumps on us. Even people over fifty can’t understand this. I like Chinese food, but I get it that not everyone likes it. I also know that if somebody doesn’t like Chinese food that doesn’t mean that something is wrong with them. Dog owners will treat you like you are abnormal if you don’t like their ferocious and poorly behaved little friends. It’s insulting.

SUMMARY
If you stand up to irresponsible and inconsiderate dog owners, you might get fired from several jobs, blacklisted, or even fail your background screening if you pulla knife on little mugsy even if mugsy is the bad guy showing his teeth and growling at you from three feet away. On the other hand, if we don’t stand up to these jerks (nice dog owners are not jerks by the way — just for the record) then they can walk all over us for the rest of our lives. My apartment complex used to have a no dog policy. This changed two years ago and I have had incidents almost every day since then. I have been bitten once, and jumped on twice which I consider an attack if it happens suddenly. For me this is woof war. What do you guys think?

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November 4, 2021

Notary on 123notary gets his notes professionally written

Filed under: Your Notes Section — admin @ 8:07 am

One of our most serious notaries on our site got his profile notes written by an advertising expert. The expert did a good job, except for a few things.

It is easier to read designations such as certifications, E&O insurance, etc., if written in bullet point format. It is also good to have a long list of packages you are familiar with.

I might not be an expert at notes writing, but I know what content needs to be there. Nice cozy text is attractive to read, but nothing beats cold hard facts, and warm fuzzy information about yourself.

So, yes, have your notes professionally written if you can afford it. But, make sure they understand the basic content that has to be there, because if they are not in our industry, they might not know. Or if they are in our industry, they still might not know. That is why I exist — to keep the record straight and to avoid omitting critical information.

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November 2, 2021

Park La Brea has gone to the dogs… literally

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:08 am

Park La Brea Apartment Complex of Los Angeles, CA 90036 used to be a reasonably nice place to live. There were noise issues from time to time over the last 20 years and security was generally sluggish solving these problems. Routine stereo use, subwoofers, children playing loudly near high rises for hours at a time, chirping fire alarms that needed new batteries. We would normally have to bother security several times or up to seven times in the past to get these problems solved and often get the run around. Those were the good old days, at least compared to the current status quo.

In the old days, until about two years ago, there were strict dog policies. The policies went from no dogs allowed period — to being changed to allow a few nicely behaved dogs. I did not read their policies as I don’t have a dog myself although you will find me dogmatic if you read to the end of this article. In the old days the only time we had a problem with dogs is if someone brought a dog in from outside and the dog made lots of noise barking. In those days security would solve that quickly.

Then, around 2019, which incidentally is the same time that in my opinion a very dark and ominous spiritual force became pervasive in my area, dogs were allowed in with few restrictions. More and more dogs came into the complex to live. However, management and security had no protocol to manage the dogs or their poop. Their attitude seems to be — we’ll deal with problems AFTER they happen rather than do preventive maintenance. Except if there are no specifics of what happened after the fact, then we have our hands tied. How useless!

I have already been bitten once, and pounced on several times, menaced, lunged at, barked at, growled at, and had serious screaming matches with dog owners. I don’t blame the dogs, I blame the owners.

So, we have several thousand dogs roaming around, most of whom are relatively new to the area. None of them have been trained from management as to what acceptable behavior is, how long or short their leash should be, or how much of a distance they should keep from those who did not express an interest in being close to their vile pet. Sure this is a nice way to attract new renters in an economy ravaged by an outward migration of people who don’t like the dragonian reaction to Covid-19 in California. But, this lackadaisical attitude towards pestilent pets will surely not be attractive to the long term residents who by definition are not likely to have a dog.

So, here is an itemization of my issues:

1. LEASH LAWS & POLICIES
Los Angeles County law requires all dogs to be on a leash not to exceed six feet. But, in Park La Brea it is common to see dogs running around freely, sometimes out of sight of their owners. It is also common to see dogs on adjustable length leashes that go up to 15 feet. If you go anywhere near these dogs, you can easily get pounced on or bitten. I pass by 40 dogs per day, and I keep at least six feet distance if possible. If I came closer to these animals I would be having an incident involving yelling at least once per day. Unless you report an individual to security that you can name, or name where they live, security will not be able to do anything — and they never act proactively on their own for this issue unless the dog looks very dangerous.

Management and Security do NOTHING to enforce leash laws or leash length laws which has led to a lot of chaos.

2. RESTRICTED PARKS
Park La Brea policy and signage disallows pets from entering the activities center park. However, whenever I go, day or night, there are always pets there. Sometimes those pets don’t behave in a manner conducive to me having a relaxing walk.

3. MUZZLES
Dogs that are aggressive are required to wear a muzzle. However, there is no definition of what aggressive is. One security guard thought that killer attack dogs were aggressive and I agreed with him. However, tiny dogs that growl at you if you walk near them are ALSO aggressive and they also bite. Their bite won’t kill you, but it is very disconcerting to be bitten or pounced on by a hostile little canine.

4. LEADERSHIP & TRAINING
Each security guard I talk to (and there have been about five I have spoken to about the dog issue) has a different understanding about dog policy. Since 20% of the problems that we have in the complex are now dog related, it behooves security management to have all of their staff be intimately knowledgeable about dog policies and probably carry written policies on their person at all times so they can look things up. Many security offices just ride around on bicycles but have no clue how to handle very basic situations. What is the point of even having security if they don’t keep us secure?

5. PREVENTIVE MAINTENANCE
My solution to the dog problem is as follows.
(a) Have fewer total dogs
(b) Segregate dogs to living in certain units on the perimeter of the complex, and playing only in certain areas, and walking only on certain sidewalks
(c) Enforce “dogs not allowed” areas with sound technology. Dogs cannot stand high pitched noises that humans would not be aware of. In certain parks, there could be devices making those noises. Additionally, security could write up citations for those who violated the policies.
(d) Signage. It is no surprise that people do not follow leash laws as there are no signs explaining what leash laws or policies are. Those signs should be in your face everywhere. At least people would know what the policies are even if they disobey them.
(e) There are 13 entrances to the activities center park. The backs of all high rises have a back door which constitutes an entrance. And then there are pedestrian entrances on either side of the four high rises that surround the pari. Additionally there is a main entrance which is the 13th entrance (or the first depending on where you started counting. There are three signs in the park which are not lit at night stating that pets are not allowed. If there were large and lit signs on all 13 entrances stating dog policy, there would be a lot fewer people with doggies creating a nuisance.
(f) Poop maintenance. Since I am familiar with the concept of living in harmony with nature, I understand that in nature, dogs poop. Therefore, unless you want to live in a poop infested world, there needs to be a mechanism for picking up the poop as not all dog owners do it for their dog. Management here leaves the poop all over the place and it stays on the grass for weeks. If you walk around at night on the grass, you will step on poop. How attractive. Yet another piece of information to put in the sales literature for prospective renters.

Welcome to Park La Brea — if you like stepping on dog poop that we let sit for weeks on end, this is the place for you! If you walk on the sidewalk you will be antagonized by dogs, but if you keep a safe margin of space between you and the dogs, you will have to walk on the grass which is covered intermittently with poop. Enjoy!

SUMMARY
In short, Park La Brea welcomed thousands of dogs with no plan on educating, managing, or disciplining a single one of them. This has led to chaos. There is poop everywhere, barking, dog bites, pouncing incidents, growling, slobbering, happening on a regular basis. If I didn’t know any better, I would think that Biden arranged this whole situation, but it seems that there are others out there as clueless as Biden who follow in his footsteps.

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November 1, 2021

Notary Public Day — every Nov 7th

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 7:53 am

Since 1975, every November 7th has been celebrated as Notary Public Day. I have never heard of this day before. I don’t think very many Notaries celebrate it. I’m not sure how you should celebrate it. Perhaps getting a rectangular cake that looks like a frosty Notary seal would be the best way. And you could sing Notary songs about declining backdating requests, 15 year whisky and a 30 year loan, I’m running out of song ideas.

To me that is one more excuse to party. But, would Notaries get together with other Notaries (competition) and celebrate, or get together with friends and describe their profession and listen to all of their lame questions? Hmm. Food for thought.

The date of November 7 was chosen as Notary Public Day in recognition of the date that America’s first notary, Thomas Fugill, was commissioned. Fugill’s appointment by the Colony of New Haven happened on October 25, 1639 (Julian calendar), November 7 on the Gregorian calendar now in use. So, Fugill’s Notary commission was not in Fugility nor was it in futility!

I’ll contact my local cake makers. We really need to make a thing out of this. We should contact calendar makers to get them to put it in the calendar as it trumps some of their other inconsequential holidays like Canadian Thanksgiving (observed.)

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October 31, 2021

In 2028, will there still be a notary industry?

Filed under: General Articles — admin @ 7:32 am

I am working so hard, that sometimes I often lose track of how what is going on in the world is going to play out. I feel that the Messiah is going to reveal himself in 2034 (my guru says that is the year. I feel that society as we know it will be wiped out before that. Of course not all of it will be destroyed. God likes to wipe out civilizations with wars, invasions, plagues, diseases, floods, earthquakes.

All of the crazy things happening now have historical precedents in the bible, or were discussed in the Bible. Isaiah discusses a lot of the social realities of today, believe it or not, and that was written about 2700 years ago.

Covid was the appetizer. People were all afraid of Covid but not the economic consequences. Inflation, labor shortages, supply chain backups — who would have guessed. I thought we would have deflation, unemployment problems, and warehouses full of stuff that nobody wanted. Boy was I wrong. I think whenever I predict the future, I should just reverse what I predict, and that will be the accurate representation of the future. Just like the Seinfeld episode — The Opposite.

I feel that in this unpredictable environment, if there is something I really want to do, I better do it now, because I might not be able to later. On the other hand, going to China was my long term goal, and now is by far the worst time to go to China with all of the vaccine nonsense going on.

So, if Covid was the appetizer, then what is the meal? Asteroids, Earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, WW3, starvation? All of these thoughts run through my head. My psychic channeled the angels and they said we would also have volcanoes — good God! If these things happen, they will happen in the next ten years. My guru said that the asteroid will come in 2028 and it will rain fire and God knows if our satellites will survive this. Our banking system is tied to satellites, so I wonder how safe our assets will be.

And if these things happen, what will happen to the Notary industry? If half of Americans die in the next ten years due to the various plagues, will there still be a Notary industry? What will I do? Will I do business with China? How many Chinese will still be alive? 98% of Chinese are atheists. I don’t think God will let too many atheists survive the plagues before the coming of the Messiah or as the Hebrews call him, “Mechiach Ben David.”

I think there will be a remnant of what once was in 2028 as far as the Notary industry goes. There will be a lot fewer people if my prediction is correct. I predict that America will have a population of 140 million in 2028 which is generous compared to what I think God will do to most of the rest of the world, especially places that lack faith in God or decency. Most of Asia will be completely wiped out including most of Israel if I guess correctly. But, some of Israel has to survive otherwise where will the Messiah live. There has to be a logic to my train of thought.

So, I am afraid. Sometimes I want to just scream in terror. I don’t know what to expect. Perhaps I should just not think about it. The death of an industry and a nation — both of which are my home and economic stability.

When my father was in his early 50’s, my mother died. His friends told him that he was getting older — and that if there was anything he really wanted to do, he should do that now. I am giving this advice to myself. I think I want to spend more time with the cactuses in Tucson and work on my health.

I’m not sure what I will do for a living in 2028 if the Notary industry is over. I better learn more Chinese so I can do some trade work. That has always been my dream.

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October 30, 2021

Notary Halloween Tips

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 8:00 am

How can you enjoy Halloween to the fullest this year as a Notary?

1. Scare people by not wearing a mask.

2. Scare people like me by telling me that you don’t take vitamin D — to me that’s even worse than sneezing during a pandemic.

3. Dress up like a Covid virus with the little spikes, etc.

4. Dress up like Fauci. I am more afraid of him than anyone at this point. I start screaming when I see him.

5. Scare people by telling them what their oil bill will be this winter due to Bidenomics, hyperinflation, and his ban on many types of domestic drilling. Trump had a big mouth but we never had trouble like this under his leadership.

6. Tell people that you are not the real Notary, but that you stole someone’s seal and notarized their document with it. (you might get arrested for that one)

7. Tell people that if they are bad, they will be reincarnated into a Notary Signing Agent — oh no, anything but that!

8. Go trick or treating and tell them that you will be hanging around there for a while because your doordash pizza delivery was booked using THEIR address.

9. You could use the new environmentally friendly shaving cream cans to vandalize someone’s property. Once again, you might be arrested for that, and for good reason. On the other hand, if they just ran out of shaving cream, they might appreciate that.

10. Knock on someone’s door with a really scary costume. Then say, “You think this is scary? Not as scary as Kamala’s performance managing the border. Speaking of which, I might be a cartel member who sneaked in, or a Taliban member. They can just waltz on in now.” Then they will say, “Not with that lack of an accent, you don’t scare me.”

11. Knock on someone’s door with a broken border wall, and some kids dressed up like Osama Bin Ladin who jump through the hole in the fence. That will make a statement regardless of which side of the political fence you are on.

12. Dress up like a Notary seal. Make the costume yourself. Just make sure you don’t leak ink, unless that is part of the gag.

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October 29, 2021

Testimonial from Joe Kennedy

Filed under: General Stories — admin @ 8:05 am

Jeremy Belmont — You Rock!!!

If there is any guy who market’s notaries effectively, it’s you. Whoever shows Notaries the finer points of Notary marketing — it’s you! Jeremy is the guy in my corner when it comes to being the notary marketing coach pushing me in the right direction.

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October 28, 2021

Is your personality compatible with Snapdocs or 123notary?

Filed under: Marketing Articles — admin @ 8:05 am

When I talk to new sign ups, many were referred from a course, an agency, or a friend. Word on the street is that Snapdocs, 123notary, and a few others are good places to sign up. However, I had to explain this to someone on a sales call, and I explained it differently.

I informed this nice lady from Ventura County that each site has its own personality. Whether you gel with that personality is something to think about before getting involved.
SnapDocs and 123notary both come highly recommended. But, if your personality doesn’t match, you are barking up the wrong tree in my opinion.

SnapDocs is for the snappy. It is for people with snappy personalities who answer texts at the speed of a millennial hooked on pumpkin frappachinos. It is for those who are caffeinated to the peak, whose jittery fingers snap into action whenever a text goes out. Those who are sluggish even by a matter of nanoseconds will get left out on Snapdocs unless it is for a job that nobody else wants.

123notary is for those who want to be treated like they are more than just a person. At 123notary, you are more than just a person, you are also a number, and we are three numbers. Those that do well on 123notary have particular personality traits. See if these match your traits.

1. You like logging into their listing every few months and manicuring their notes sections so that their factual, detailed, and unique information will interest and intrigue the readers (who read everything by the way just so that you know.)

2. You like asking for reviews and sending links to their review page so they can get more reviews to stand out.

3. Some like passing our certification test. This is more critical for new people on the site who do not have name recognition in the industry.

4. You like answering phone calls and emails for job offers(old school) rather than responding to texts or using apps (millennial B.S. in my opinion).

There are other options for advertising. Notary Rotary is old school and some people do well there. Less is required. Just put your name on a list and they have fewer requirements to do well than 123notary does. Notary Cafe gets some people work and they are not as caffeinated as SnapDocs despite their name. And then signingagent.com gets work for some, but not all. Don’t overlook Yelp, Google Local and other options.

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October 26, 2021

The goal of 123notary

Filed under: Marketing Articles — admin @ 8:03 am

The goal of 123notary is to keep title companies who use us happy. 123notary gets more title and escrow searches than any other directory out there. I have to compete as an individual human with 100 million dollar companies. They only way I can do this is because we live in a talent market these days rather than a purely capitalistic system.

I focus on having the best notaries, filtering out free listings that don’t measure up, filtering up good listings that deserve higher placement, etc. All of this is to give the best search results for title.

I quiz people, help them with their notes, coach them on getting reviews, teach industry competency, and even help people choose business names from time to time.

The goal is not to have the most listings, but to have a critical mass of Notaries who are worth calling and who have very complete looking listings. And I feel I have achieved that goal, although it is a lot of work to maintain!

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