CHARLIE ROSE INTERVIEWS A NOTARY
CHARLIE: Welcome to the program. Tonight for the full hour, I interview a notary. I’m pleased to have you at this table.
NOTARY: Honored to be here, Charlie.
CHARLIE: Tell me… what makes a notary tick?
NOTARY: You mean ticked off?
CHARLIE: No, not ticked off. Tick! What makes a person want to become what it is you do?
NOTARY: Darn. If you meant “ticked off,” I had a good answer.
CHARLIE: Go ahead.
NOTARY: When I ask somebody, “what’s your sign,” and they think I meant their birth sign.
CHARLIE: Okay, how about answering my question?
NOTARY: What made me want to become a notary? My mom said I was good at witnessing signatures at the age of 2.
CHARLIE: What possible signatures could a two-year old be good at witnessing?
NOTARY: When my folks signed for a used Fiat, I said my first words – “Mama. No!”
CHARLIE: Fiats have terrible reliability. Mama didn’t listen to you?
NOTARY: Not really, I said “no” a lot then. I was in my terrible twos.
CHARLIE: Where are today’s notaries headed in the future? Will we even be signing things anymore? Everything’s digital.
NOTARY: More and more documents are digital. But many will always be too sensitive to risk security breaches.
CHARLIE: Are you a believer in executing a document?
NOTARY: No, Charlie, I believe a document should be behind bars, but never executed.
CHARLIE: What’s your feeling about statutes of limitations?
NOTARY: There are statutes of limitations, and statues of limitation.
CHARLIE: What’s a statue of limitation?
NOTARY: One with no more room for birds to poop on.
CHARLIE: How would you define a “credible witness?”
NOTARY: Someone who knows the signer. If the witness is you, then it’s an incredible witness.
CHARLIE: You really know how to kiss up to the host. Getting back to my question about the future and the bad actors out there.
NOTARY: They’re on those other talk shows… As for the Chinese, they can produce an authentic looking ID for 200 dollars.
CHARLIE: I’ve heard notaries will be able to directly query the DMV drivers’ license data base as well as the Department of State’s Passport data base to verify the authenticity of the documents.
NOTARY: The Chinese will be able to hack into the DMV data base and create falsified records.
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