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September 3, 2019

Should you include Kleenex in your notary bag?

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 10:57 pm

One Notary on NR had a signer who burst into tears and left the room. I guess she didn’t like the terms of her loan. I have never had that happen thank God although I had some moments where borrowers were not filled in properly and had lots of last minute questions.

If someone starts crying, you will look a lot more professional if you have a box of Kleenex on your person. I guess it might not fit in your bag unless you have the Kleenex travel pack for air travel. But, you will look more professional if you have it even if you don’t need it.

You could do show and tell to impress the borrowers. “Check out my notary bag contents – I have a stamp, embosser, law primer, ack forms, jurats, permission to travel, copy certification, pens, stapler, oh, and don’t forget — Kleenex, just in case the borrower doesn’t like the terms of their loan.” How professional!

I heard in the future there will be a new app to get therapy from Siri.

NOTARY: Siri, the borrower doesn’t like the terms of their loan.

SIRI: How does that make them feel?

NOTARY: Bad

SIRI: What was their relationship like with their mother?

NOTARY: Bad

SIRI: It looks like the problem lies within and not with the loan documents.

NOTARY: Thanks Siri, I think you are in the wrong line of work. You should be a cheesy guru instead of an app. Maybe you can call your service iGuru. Whatever they ask, tell them — the problem is coming from within. You’ll have thousands or Hindus following you overnight. Canned answers work with certain crowds.

BORROWER: Sob. Yes, it is true. The documents are not the problem at all.

NOTARY: Does this mean you will keep the loan?

BORROWER: Of course not dummy. The Lender is trying to rip me off? Boo hoo hoo.

SIRI: Time to offer them one of those Kleenexes you have in your Notary bag.

NOTARY: Oh yeah. Have a Kleenex.

BORROWER: Thanks, you are one of the most considerate Notaries I’ve ever had. Will you marry me?

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