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April 21, 2019

The notary who was oral retentive

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 10:40 am

There once was a Notary named Clyde who was so picky about how he gave his Oaths. Everything had to be worded very particularly. If there was even a word out of place, he would have to rewrite the entire script. Each job got a unique script. And he didn’t like it when the affiants were sloppy about how they answered Oath questions.

CLYDE: Do you solemnly swear that you are a citizen of these great United States of America, so help you God, with liberty and justice for all?

AFFIANT: Yeah, whatever.

CLYDE: I beg your pardon. Whatever is not an acceptable answer. I would like a clear and definitive yes.

AFFIANT: Yes…. definitively. Boy are you anal.

CLYDE: I’m only anal retentive about signatures and dates on documents. About verbal acts I’m oral retentive.

AFFIANT: I never heard that one before.

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1 Comment »

  1. Our CA wording runs something like this:

    “Do you solemnly swear or affirm that all the information on this document is true and correct so help you?”

    This provides the person to mentally select whether they wish to swear to a supreme being or upon their honor. In this PC world, there are many names that could be applied to for help. By leaving it open-ended, the person can again mentally agree with whomever they wish.

    I do agree with being Orally Fixated. I will not accept “Whatever,” a head nod, nor yeah. I wait for a confirmed “Yes” or “No” before going forward.

    Comment by R. L. Scherrer — June 10, 2019 @ 9:01 pm

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