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June 16, 2017

His 1st 100 days as a New Notary Public

Filed under: Humorous Posts — admin @ 8:49 am

Ever since FDR, when the only thing we had to fear was fear itself (and if you were a notary, not getting calls), the leader of the free world’s first 100 days in office was a blueprint for how effective he was and how much he could get done.

What about a notary public’s first 100 days? What are the promises a notary public makes on the job, the “campaign,” that he finds more challenging “governing”?
What should he be aiming to accomplish?

A certain number of loans for starters. An experienced notary could do between 3 and 8 per day unless it’s the end of the month. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a loan a day keeps the Secretary of State away. Assuming you don’t backdate. A beginner, if he’s lucky, can do one loan per day. So if you reach 100 loans in 100 days, you’re doing fairly okay. But if you’re doing 1001 loans in 1001 nights, you’re positively sheikh. If you have an affair on the job, you might do 69 if you’re lucky, or get lucky that is. If the lender’s gay, you might do a reverse, and I’m not talking about mortgages. If you’re a bad Georgia notary, you might get your commission im”peached”.

Who advises the notary? Who are his Jarrods and Ivankas? How about the NNA hotline. And, of course, Carmen at 123Notary.

How should a notary sell his agenda and goals, a la the leader of the free world, in early morning Tweets?

The goal is to get new companies to use you. Which begets this tweet…

“Just found out other companies you’re currently using wiretapped my office. Sad!”


“Tweet-backs. Sad!”


“That company didn’t pay quickly enough! Mean!”

If a notary doesn’t quite reach his goals by the end of the first 100 days, how can he make it sound, like the leader of the free world, as if he’s doing better than he is?

As in this Tweet…

“Jessica at SBC Signing Services says I was good and would definitely use me again. Although I haven’t heard from them again. Sad!”


“Paul said he would write a review for me. Although it’s been 45 days and nothing has happened. Sad!”

If all of your goals don’t get met in the first 100 days, there’s always the next 100 days. Remember – Rome wasn’t built in a day. Neither was a wall around Mexico.


You might also like:

Compilation of posts about notary & politics

Trump – Making American Notaries Great Again

2016 Notary Timeline; A year in review


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